Saturday, November 17, 2007
“Rudy Giuliani was the best mayor New York has ever had.”
Above: Billy, a lifelong New Yorker, throws an excellent curve ball.
Above: Billy, a lifelong New Yorker, throws an excellent curve ball.
Did you ever wonder what the show 24 would be like if it was set in 1994? No? Well, for starters, it would be much funnier.
It is what it is ... very, very funny.
My nomination would be Byron York.
(via The Poor Man Institute)
Dan Collins, fill-in insufferable twat at Protein Deficiency, has taken loathsome douchebaggery in the blog world to a whole new level with this out-of-nowhere hit job on an ex-girlfriend.
UPDATE VIA INSTAPUTZ: Jeff Goldstein has issued an update to the post linked above and he gets a sincere “bravo” from me. I’m also open to the notion that this might be a spoof post, as some people have indicated in the comments at PW, though no one, including Goldstein, seems entirely sure.
UPDATE UPDATE: It really was his ex-girlfriend. Yikes. This boy’s got (say in sing-songy voice) issues:
Huh. Well, first of all, I know this person much better than you do, and she knows something about me, as well, Second, the reason she went to medical school in the first place was through my urging. Third, I know her well enough to know that she will interpret this as the psychological hand up that I intend for it to be. Fourth, if you think that I would post something like this just to intensify someone’s humiliation, you don’t know me at all. Fifth, the fact of airing this is liable to give [nickname redacted by Rumproast] some sense of how little I think this is important to my conception of who she is, and because that is so, and because I’ve been honest in a way that was liable to bring criticism upon me, I am hoping that it gives her some breathing space in the great wide world, because I know that she is not at all as brazen as she would like to seem.
UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE: Due to a follow-up comment by Goldstein I’m dialing back my “sincere ‘bravo’” to a golf clap.
In this case, “WTF?” = “What the fortune?” This is what was inside of the fortune cookie that my wife got with her Chinese food last night:
The greatest medicine is the emptiness of everything.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go drown myself in a huge vat of lo mein.
...at the Garden last night.
Because that’s how I roll.
Categories: Images •
ADDENDUM: The post title is actually a quote from my good pal Colin. Several years ago we were talking about how much 9/11 was being exploited and he said (sarcastically, of course), “It almost makes me wish 9/11 never happened.” It is one of the funniest things anyone’s ever said to me.
Like someone says in the comments to this linked post: “I love David Letterman. Always have. Always will.”
I’ve just learned that David Letterman and his producers yesterday morning announced to his Late Show staff that they will be paid through the end of the year even though the show isn’t on the air during the writers strike. “Dave’s not doing this to get good press, which is why it hasn’t been reported for almost two days,” a source tells me. “This is really significant because, as opposed to all of the other shows, this money comes out of Dave’s own pocket.” When Late Show stopped making new episodes last week, CBS ceased paying Letterman’s production company on November 5th.
I’m starting to compile my favorite albums of the year and have settled on the fact that Blitzen Trapper‘s Wild Mountain Nation (think Pavement meets the Kinks) will garner my much-coveted top spot. But when it comes to identifying the new release that I’ve listened to the most in ‘07, it would have to be the gloriously buoyant old school hip-hop comp Top Shelf 8-8-88 that was released this year as a Japanese import. I first heard about it on one of my favorite radio shows, NPR’s “Fair Game,” and got a hold of a copy soon after. Recently I’ve been revisiting some somewhat silly step-back stuff like Das EFX, Fu-Schnickens and A Tribe Called Quest, and Top Shelf slotted righted into that mix perfectly. And the best thing about the comp, which claims to feature “lost” recordings from ‘88 by the likes of Black Sheep, Biz Markie, Jungle Brothers, MC Lyte and Big Daddy Kane, is that it’s complete and utter bullshit and I really don’t care:
The rumors swirled all summer: a hip-hop El Dorado, a treasure trove of lost recordings by old-school greats like Big Daddy Kane and Biz Markie, had been discovered in an abandoned storage locker in New Jersey.
Then, in August, an album called “Top Shelf 8/8/88” was issued in Japan. Supposedly a collection of never-before-released recordings from 1988, it came with a back story that was even more elaborate than the rumors. And as the music spread on the Internet, skeptics set blogs ablaze: was it a hoax?
The album’s liner notes told this story: An unidentified New York hip-hop aficionado scavenging through a storage locker near Hoboken, N.J., discovered a box of studio reels. The only clue to their contents was a name scribbled on a label: “Fab Five Freddy,” the hip-hop impresario who was host of “Yo! MTV Raps” in the 1980s.
According to the story, the reels turned out to be recordings from hip-hop’s fabled golden era, taped at a studio called Top Shelf in a basement in the East Village of Manhattan. The reels were supposedly lost during the Tompkins Square Park riots of 1988, and the studio later shut down.
Built on loops of classic soul songs and with rap that is at least four times faster than what is usually heard on the radio today, “Top Shelf” is peppered with references to Michael Dukakis, the Pontiac Fiero and the first “Die Hard” film. But why, as fans wrote online, do some of the supposedly teenage rappers sound hoarse and winded? And how come nobody has stepped forward and claimed to be one of the “anonymous Top Shelf producers” credited with the album’s excellent productions?
It’s due for a rumored US release in early ‘08 but if you want to preview it before then, I found this link via Google. You’re welcome.
MORE INFO: Werner von Wallenrod’s Humble, Little Hip-Hop Blog and Soul Sides.
“Pigpile” is a live recording of Big Black‘s final tour in 1987. The video was taken at the Hammersmith Apollo concert hall, London and is currently out-of-print. This is pretty damn near the entire thing. Playlist below the fold. Enjoy.
From Peter Berkowitz’s editorial in the WSJ:
Hating the president is almost as old as the republic itself. The people, or various factions among them, have indulged in Clinton hatred, Reagan hatred, Nixon hatred, LBJ hatred, FDR hatred, Lincoln hatred, and John Adams hatred, to mention only the more extravagant hatreds that we Americans have conceived for our presidents.
That first paragraph sounds somewhat even-keeled so far, right? Let’s cue up the second paragraph:
But Bush hatred is different.
And then Berkowitz goes on to unfurl the typical story of how people were mean to him at a dinner when he defended Bush (it seems like I’ve read accounts like this one several times on the internet—never mind how venomous a response to a defense of, say, Hillary would be received at a table full o’ wingnuts) and a tepid overview of how Bush really hasn’t been that bad or divisive of a president.
The kicker comes here, though:
In short, Bush hatred is not a rational response to actual Bush perfidy. Rather, Bush hatred compels its progressive victims—who pride themselves on their sophistication and sensitivity to nuance—to reduce complicated events and multilayered issues to simple matters of good and evil. Like all hatred in politics, Bush hatred blinds to the other sides of the argument, and constrains the hater to see a monster instead of a political opponent.
In short, Berkowitz lays bare what he’s really trying to get at: liberals aren’t allowed to be angry because it’s not what conservatives want them to be. They’re supposed to be nuanced, serene and dull as dishwater (or John Kerry). They’re supposed to realize how awful and uncivilized they behaved in the 60’s and make eternal atonement for it. Only conservatives can get be angry and mean and see stuff in black and white because it’s a lot easier for them to win elections when lefties are suppliant and borderline catatonic while nutters are spitting blood and breaking every unwritten rule of civility. And if you were a real liberal—a good liberal—you’d take Berkowitz’s advice and just throw yourself into a coma already.
Ugh. I can’t believe we’re still going through this shit.
From The New York Times:
In the genteel world of bridge, disputes are usually handled quietly and rarely involve issues of national policy. But in a fight reminiscent of the brouhaha over an anti-Bush statement by Natalie Maines of the Dixie Chicks in 2003, a team of women who represented the United States at the world bridge championships in Shanghai last month is facing sanctions, including a yearlong ban from competition, for a spur-of-the-moment protest.
At issue is a crudely lettered sign, scribbled on the back of a menu, that was held up at an awards dinner and read, “We did not vote for Bush.”
By e-mail, angry bridge players have accused the women of “treason” and “sedition.”
The proposed sanctions would hurt the team’s playing members financially. “I earn my living from bridge, and a substantial part of that from being hired to compete in high-level competitions,” Debbie Rosenberg, a team member, said. “So being barred would directly affect much of my ability to earn a living.”
It calls for a one-year suspension from federation events, including the World Bridge Olympiad next year in Beijing; a one-year probation after that suspension; 200 hours of community service “that furthers the interests of organized bridge”; and an apology drafted by the federation’s lawyer.
It would also require them to write a statement telling “who broached the idea of displaying the sign, when the idea was adopted, etc.”
Alan Falk, a lawyer for the federation, wrote the four team members on Nov. 6, “I am instructed to press for greater sanction against anyone who rejects this compromise offer.”
Greenberg said she decided to put up the sign in response to questions from players from other countries about U.S. interrogation techniques, the war in Iraq and other foreign policy issues.
“There was a lot of anti-Bush feeling, questioning of our Iraq policy and about torture,” Greenberg said. “I can’t tell you it was an overwhelming amount, but there were several specific comments, and there wasn’t the same warmth you usually feel at these events.”
Rosenberg said the team members intended the sign as a personal statement that demonstrated American values and noted that it was held up at the same time some team members were singing along to “The Star-Spangled Banner” and waving small American flags.
Read it all (or via this non-subscription IHT link).
More from Jon Swift:
I always thought that people who play Bridge, a needlessly complicated card game, were harmless enough, though they certainly could be making better use of their time. But I had no idea that that the world of competitive Bridge was a hotbed of anti-American feeling.
(Hat tip to TBogg)
MORE: A wingnut weighs in with the twisted logic that you should never protest in a place where protests aren’t allowed. Or at least you shouldn’t protest about anything expect how you’re upset that you can’t protest there. Or something like that. And, surprise surprise, just like TBogg predicted, Malkin is on the case, though she really should have pinched my post title.
I thought Julie Mason was joking about this, but she wasn’t. The following is really how Bush’s recent press conference with German Chancellor Angela Merkel ended:
PRESIDENT BUSH: I’m now going to go feed the Chancellor a hamburger.
(Laughter.) Right here, Crawford, Texas. No, well, I mean back over there.
Thank you all.
CHANCELLOR MERKEL: Obviously, for me, as a person who originally came
from Hamburg -
PRESIDENT BUSH: Yes.
CHANCELLOR MERKEL:—it’s even more important.
PRESIDENT BUSH: Hamburger.
CHANCELLOR MERKEL: Thank you.
Mental and heavy.
Go to Judas Bullethead’s MySpace page. Download all four lo-fi MP3s they’re giving away there. Listen to over and over and over (like I just did). Be one with teh stoopid.