Sunday, December 09, 2007

The Sunday Selector: December 9th, 2007

“Crazy Horses”—The Osmonds (via Missing the Moon)

  • MORE FUN THAN IT SHOULD BE: If Jackson Pollack could have right-clicked to change paint colors, maybe he wouldn’t have drank himself to death. (via oh. you. again.)
  • RUSSERT DOES GOOD: If you missed it this morning, Tim Russert was pretty aggressive with Rudy Guliani this morning.  Best Russert quote: “Using that reasoning, would it be appropriate for a president to provide Secret Service protection for his mistress?” “Best” Guiliani quote: “I don’t make many mistakes, but when I make them, they’re big ones.” You can watch it here. Transcript here.

(Please note: My internet connection was down nearly all day, so this is all I have for you.  It’s driving me absolutely crazy at the moment trying to get anywhere on the innertubes.  Yeeeeeaaaaaarrrgh!)

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/09/07 at 07:19 PM
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Saturday, December 08, 2007

Baby Jesus butt plugs

Too funny.  I love it when “good” Christians talk dirty.  And I love it even more when they mix up their disgust for homosexuals and Muslims into one gooey stew of stupidity.

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/08/07 at 01:40 PM
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Categories: PoliticsNuttersRelijunSkull HampersYouTubidity

Gravel load

I get a kick out out of Mike Gravel and watched that last “Power to the People” video he did over and over and over, but if you’re going to say the following in your new video (below the fold):

“But the country needs a guy like me.  Candidates today can’t tell you their favorite ice cream without a focus group. I’ll tell them exactly what I think.” might want to leave the following off of the video’s YouTube page:

(Produced by Hodge Pictures/ screenplay by Joe Shepter)

If you’re wondering, Joe Shepter’s favorite ice cream is mint chocolate chip.

read the whole post »

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/08/07 at 01:14 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '08YouTubidity

Friday, December 07, 2007

Paul Krugman is a terrorist

The wingnuts were right!

UPDATE: He’s lucky he didn’t get the Uday and Quasi treatment.

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/07/07 at 04:02 PM
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Categories: NewsPoliticsBedwettersEditorialsWar In Error


Last night at the Rwanda Reporting benefit (great time!) I was talking with someone about this great vignette (featuring RZA, GZA & Bill Murray) from an otherwise not-so-great film (Coffee and Cigarettes). Enjoy.

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/07/07 at 02:06 PM
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Categories: MoviesYouTubidity

“Car 118, we’ve got a mistress on the upper east side who needs emergency transport to Saks.”

Driving Miss Judi
Dear Daily News, a “girlfriend” is something you have when you’re not a married man, a “mistress” is something you have when you’re a married man fucking around on your wife.  Thank you.

It looks like the Noble Knight of Nineelevenstan was strong-arming the NYPD to play limo service for Judi “First Mistress” Nathan long before it had been recently reported.  The New York Daily News has it all:

Judith Nathan got taxpayer-funded chauffeur services from the NYPD earlier than previously disclosed - even before her affair with then-Mayor Rudy Giuliani was revealed, witnesses and sources tell the Daily News.

“It went on for months before the affair was public,” said Lee Degenstein, 52, a retired Smith Barney vice president who formerly lived at 200 E. 94th St., Nathan’s old building.

“It was going on longer than anybody thought,” added Degenstein, who, along with others in the neighborhood, said they often saw Nathan hopping into unmarked NYPD cars in early 2000, before the affair was revealed that May.

When pressed by The News Thursday, aides to the Republican presidential hopeful conceded that Nathan got police protection “sporadically” before December 2000 - the previously acknowledged beginning of her taxpayer-funded detail.

Then-Police Commissioner Bernard Kerik said in January 2001 the NYPD assigned Nathan round-the-clock protection the month before because of an unspecified threat against her on a streetcorner near her home. He insisted at a news conference she had no guards until then.

Thursday, Giuliani aides changed their story. They said Nathan had received previously undisclosed “threats” earlier in 2000, and that protection was provided at those times.

They refused to provide dates, describe the nature of the threats or confirm - as witnesses and a law enforcement source now contend - that the protection began before she was publicly identified as the married mayor’s girlfriend in May 2000.

That would make the threat justification all the more puzzling, because she wasn’t a public figure.


A law enforcement source familiar with mayoral protection said Nathan got bodyguards as far back as 1999, shortly after the affair began.

“If she had to go shopping, errands, that’s where you went,” the source said.

Other residents at the building said they often saw Nathan coming and going with two well-dressed drivers, who occasionally toted her packages.

“She was always coming back with shopping bags from the different well-known stores in New York,” said Jacqueline Elman, a building resident for 12 years who walked her dog regularly and often spotted Nathan, who became the third Mrs. Giuliani in 2003.

But, ya know, quick, look over there!  Bill Clinton is getting a blow job!

UPDATE: Apparently the Giuliani camp is getting very nervous about all of this bad news. (via memeorandum)

MORE: Who should be ashamed of themselves?

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/07/07 at 08:28 AM
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Categories: New York CityNewsPoliticsElection '08Giuliani is a Jerk

Thursday, December 06, 2007

What to do the next few days in New York City

This is a quick reminder guide for my fellow Big Applets:

  • Williamsburg: Go to the Rwanda Reporting benefit tonight at Supreme Trading featuring a performance by Francis and the Lights, free hard-to-find Rwandan food and an hour’s worth of complimentary Bass beer. The donation is a measly $20.
  • Manhattan: Go to see the wonderful and unique documentary Billy the Kid that opened last night at the IFC Center for a limited engagement.  I haven’t had time to finish my review, but you can read some of the raves at Metacritic.
  • Manhattan: Go to see the long-awaited Holy Modal Rounders documentary Bound to Lose (and accompanying live music bonuses) at the Anthology during its one-week run (starts this Friday).

UPDATE: In comments the delightful and reliable Robin from oh. you. again. recommends buying tix for Au Revoir Parapluie (Farewell, Umbrella) at BAM in downtown Brooklyn. I’m doing that right now.

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/06/07 at 08:56 AM
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Categories: FoodMoviesMovie ReviewsMusicNew York CityBrooklynManhattan

Suddenly Seeking Stupid Syndrome

I was going to write about the Little Green Footfungi’s reaction to the Omaha shopping mall murders, but Lawyers, Guns and Money beat me to it.  I know nutters have come up with a lot of ridiculous ideas in recent years, but Sudden Jihad Syndrome just may be the absolute dumbest. It lays bear their intense paranoia, full-throttle Islamophobia, and knuckle-dragging numbskullery all in one simple little phrase.

BONUS: For additional fun, read the comments over at The Jawa Report or just this from Rusty Shackleford himself:

As for the knee-jerk first reaction, a friend in Omaha who’s listening to reports live on the radio says it’s not Islamic terror.

Probably spot on….but before you rule it out, just remember Lee Boyd Malvo.

Yeah, because I’m fairly drool-free, I can remember Charles Whitman, Columbine and Richard McBeef, too.

How do these bedwetters sleep at night?

UPDATE: Since I suffer from Giuliani Derangement Syndrome, I should note that Daniel Pipes, who coined the term Sudden Jihad Syndrome, was signed on as an adviser to the Giuliani team.

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/06/07 at 07:40 AM
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Wednesday, December 05, 2007

I’d Prefer David Cross, But This Will Do for Now

My wife and I were just talking about how we haven’t read or heard much about Al Franken’s run for the Senate lately, but today The NY Times has published an article about him working the ropes in Minnesota. I hope the state’s Democrats do the right thing and nominate him because, well, it would be entertaining as hell to watch him run against the thoroughly despicable Norm Coleman.  Best quote (via an MP3 audio excerpt available with the article):

To the extent that I have money from show business ... ya know, he gets it from big pharma, big insurance, big tobacco, big coal, you know, I get it from big comedy. And big comedy doesn’t want anything from me. Big comedy doesn’t want me to put the seventh fleet off of China so that they don’t make more knock-offs of Caddyshack.

ADDED AL FRANKEN BONUS!!!: Video of him giving a speech this year at a wedding in Little Rock, AK on 11/24.



Posted by Kevin K. on 12/05/07 at 08:24 AM
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Categories: NewsPoliticsElection '08

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Sy of Relief

Quick question: Is Sy Hersh ever wrong about anything?
Quick answer: No.

CONVERSELY: While we’re on the subject….

Quick question: Is John Bolton ever right about anything?
Quick answer: No.

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/04/07 at 11:29 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersNuttersWar In Error

Paul Newman is one sick fuck

Recently I was cleaning off some of the detritus that we have magnetized (magneted?) to the fridge when I got a chance to reread something my wife and I had torn off a bag of Newman’s Own popcorn.  This is really what it said (image below the fold):

LEGEND: I’ll tell you how bad it is.  Nobody gets trusted with popcorn - except me. That includes the FBI, the IRS, Tiffany’s and concessionaires of any ilk.  A good flick arrives on the local screen, you see ol’ Newman scuttling across the lobby with a greasy brown paper bag of this homemade popcorn in one hand and—you guessed it—a machete in the other.  Who’s who lists a lot of one-armed people in my hometown.  They got caught trying to muscle their way into my greasy brown paper bag.  The way I feel—they got off easy. They should have been strung up.

Col. P.L. “Pops” Newman

“[Y]ou guessed it—a machete”? Are you fucking kidding me?  Who would guess that Paul Newman would be “scuttling across the lobby” with “a greasy brown paper bag” and a fucking machete? And since when did “who’s who” start keeping tabs of amputees in any town, let alone the town where a deranged Paul Newman is running around wildly hacking people’s arms off? And why isn’t he under arrest for this crime or locked up in a mental ward?  He owns the company that makes the popcorn and, instead of offering people free samples, HE LOBS OF THEIR LIMBS WITH A MACHETE if they try to eat any! And then, in case you don’t think his out-of-control sharing issues were batshit crazy enough, he has to add that all of these poor, sans-arms bastards are lucky because HE SHOULD HAVE KILLED THEM.

What does it say on the side of his salsa jars?  That if you take any from him he’ll slowly peel off your skin and wear it like a suit? That he’ll jam your open mouth over a curb and ram his boot into the back of your head? If you sneak a sip of his lemonade will he tear the legs off of your children and make coffee tables using their tiny appendages?

I don’t even want to think about what he’ll do if you try to use any of his steak sauce because it probably involves guillotines, mass genocide and skull fucking.

read the whole post »

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/04/07 at 12:31 PM

Categories: FoodMessylaneous

Quote of the day

About Rudy Giuliani from Politco:

“He treated the media like mushrooms,” said Rob Polner, a former Newsday reporter who edited the book “America’s Mayor: The Hidden History of Rudy Giuliani’s New York.” “He kept them in the dark and fed them a lot of manure.”

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/04/07 at 08:46 AM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '08Giuliani is a Jerk

Monday, December 03, 2007

Books of architecture

What’s even cooler than the buildings is that the design concept has been implemented in two different cities.  You really need to see this.

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/03/07 at 10:58 AM
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Sunday, December 02, 2007

The Sunday Selector: December 2nd, 2007

Minutemen—“This Ain’t No Picnic”


Busy, busy, busy ... and no time to burrow for you, my loyal Roasters. Plus I need to rest up for Mudhoney performing the entire Superfuzz Bigmuff CD tonight. I hear they play something called grout rock.

  • THE DECEMBER 2007 MOVIE PREVIEW:  Always an informative and entertaining read from Dave Thomas at FREEloader.
  • FANTASTIC DOCUMENTARY COMING TO NYC: The wonderful and unique documentary Billy the Kid is opening this Wednesday, December 5th at the IFC Center in Manhattan for a limited engagement. Carve out some room for it if you live in NYC because it’s highly recommended. Make sure to check out the excellent trailer at the documentary’s web site (or these outtakes at YouTube).  You can read our review of it at some point tomorrow here at Rumproast.
  • OUR YUCK! MOMENT OF THE DAY: Missing the Moon alerts us to a reason to add one more entry to the rule book in NCAA basketball. They also teach us to never, ever fuck with transvestites.

UPDATE: A new entry for our horribly neglected Worst.Band.Name.Ever category. One of the bands opening for Mudhoney tonight is called Pissed Jeans. No matter how good they are a little part of me will always hate them for that.

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/02/07 at 01:40 PM
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You *can* cheat when it comes to security

(via Atrios)

UPDATE: Figured I’d check into YouTube to see how the dreadful pro-Rudy “President” “parody” has been doing since we snickered at it back in mid-November. Only a little over 6000 views on YouTube is pretty dismal for a video someone obviously dumped a lot of money into, including advance promotion and building a whole web site for it. I guarantee the video embedded above, which was probably just crapped out on a home computer, will have at least that many views in a couple of days. But remember, Republicans are much better with money.

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/02/07 at 12:36 PM
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