Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Hellraiser ‘09: The Senate’s Christmas Package for America

“The box. You opened it. We came.”

An oiled and barb-tipped cat-o’-nine-threads for up-at-dawn ‘Roasters who take pleasure in torment. The Senate vote on Health Care Reform is now scheduled for 7:00AM.

Volunteers welcome. Orphans preferred. Bring your bitterest anguish and most unspeakable joys. But no tears, please. It’s a waste of good suffering.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 12/23/09 at 10:26 PM
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Categories: PoliticsHealth Care

Jane, You Ignorant ...

Jane Hamsher, Grover Norquist’s new BFF, is now apparently on a crusade to throw Bernie Sanders out of the Senate if he doesn’t vote against HCR. This would be the same Bernie Sanders who is the only avowed Socialist in the US Senate. Yes, according to FDL, a Socialist is not “progressive” enough to pass the purity test.

I thought Lambert was the pinnacle of petulant, delusional douchebaggery. I was wrong.

Posted by Tom65 on 12/23/09 at 10:19 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersElection '10NuttersPoliblogsPUMAs

Virgin Birth Strains Credibility, but I Flat-Out Refuse to Believe that Something this Lame Exists

I didn’t realize that Freethinkers Brights Smarter Than Everybody Elses nonbelievers had their own holiday.

HumanLight presents an alternative reason to celebrate: a Humanist’s vision of a good future. It is a future in which all people can identify with each other, behave with the highest moral standards, and work together toward a happy, just and peaceful world.

PARTAY!!!

It’s worth clicking over just for the slideshow. Unless you suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder, in which case it’ll send you running to the tub with a toaster under your arm.

I doubt I’ll ever waver in my belief that religion’s been a net negative for society, but I will say this: atheism has yet to provide mankind with a yearly opportunity to fuck drunken coworkers. Advantage: space ghost.

Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on 12/23/09 at 09:14 PM
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Categories: Relijun

Grover Norquist Random Progressive Quote Generator

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Grover licks the FDL petition for good luck.

Grover Norquist Random Progressive Quote:

“I don’t want to abolish government. I simply want to reduce it to the size where I can drown it in the Firedoglake.”

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/23/09 at 06:00 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBarack ObamaNuttersPoliblogsSkull Hampers

Dildo of the Day: Lindsey Graham

Zandar smacks down the Graham cracker and then rolls out this bit of wisdom:

Now I know that I’ve said that the real reason the GOP wants to kill this [health care] bill is exactly because of race:  that this bill will help minorities is anathema to the teabagger jagoffs who “want to take the country back”.  Some, not all, but some of the opposition to this bill is racism, pure and simple.

It’s telling how desperate the Repubs are that they are now playing this card as a last resort.  It’s also a sign of how much better than the status quo it will be.  Right now the focus is on this being a “big government spending” bill.  But if the GOP wants to make it a “welfare handout to blacks” issue, the center is going to turn on the Republicans again.

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/23/09 at 12:38 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBarack ObamaHealth CareNuttersSkull Hampers

All you need to read about the progbaggers (teaproggers?) today

Matt Bastard with a side o’ No Nice. (Too much good stuff to quote, just go read.)

SOMEWHAT RELATED: James Wolcott hails Harry Reid, “teabag-Christmas slayer.” [via Teresa K.]

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/23/09 at 11:01 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBarack ObamaHealth CarePoliblogsTelevision

A very special holiday wish

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Peace on earth and good will toward men is a worthy holiday goal. But to really make the world brighter, it would be helpful if certain annoying people would fuck off in 2010. Who do you wish to hear much less from as we enter a new decade? My top 5 after the jump.

read the whole post »

Posted by Betty Cracker on 12/23/09 at 07:55 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersNuttersSarah Palin

BREAKING: Progressive Blogosphere Agrees on Interim Health Care Strategy

Or not. I just rarely get a chance to use Cannibal! The Musical as a poliblog analogy. And this seems about right.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 12/23/09 at 12:06 AM
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Categories: Knee SlappersPoliticsBedwettersNuttersPolisnarkYouTubidity

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Plan 9 from Left Blogistan

1955 archive footage: Fuchs Blitzer interviews Dr. Eric Vornoff, the original disaffected Progressive Blogger, regarding a dynamic new strategy for retaking the Democratic Party and enacting a truly liberal agenda.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 12/22/09 at 03:20 PM
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Categories: Knee SlappersPoliticsBedwettersHealth CareNuttersPoliblogsPolisnark

2009 “Opportunistic Meme-Napper Marketing Achievement” Award Winner

God bless the insidious spam-meisters at http://www.bestheartrate.com (who sent me this email offer) for exploiting the subliminal language cues of wingnut opposition to Health Care Reform to sell bullshit quick-money schemes to white-knuckled Americans who have no jobs and no health insurance.

Click on the link to read (and HEAR!) how even lazy, stupid people can keep their homes, own a Lamborghini and probably pay for quintuple bypass surgery out of petty cash just by “Killing Bills,” saying “NO” and acting fast. And, by all means, take a moment to tell helpful “Live Agent” Emma that you’ll be happy to sign up for whatever she’s selling just as soon as she takes off her top and types “Yes, Master” in the reply box.

read the whole post »

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 12/22/09 at 12:00 PM
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Categories: MessylaneousPoliticsHealth CareSkull Hampers

Rumproast’s Top 15 Music Videos of 2009

Yesterday we rolled out the honorable mentions and today we present the fifteen best music videos of 2009. Enjoy.

15) Steel Panther’s “Death To All But Metal”A perfectly goofy, risque and politically incorrect ([Trigger warning.]!) send-up of all of those “Hot for Teacher”-style videos of the 80’s.  The lyrics could not be more appropriately moronic or offensive. Features a cameo by Sarah Silverman as a horny principal.

 

14) The Flaming Lips’ “I Can Be a Frog”A cutesy-odd little semi-animated video featuring a girl in a bikini imitating critters (and other things) and the Yeah Yeah Yeahs’ Karen O providing the sound effects. Deceptively adorable.

read the whole post »

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/22/09 at 10:17 AM
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Categories: MusicMusic VideosRumproast RelatedYouTubidity

Monday, December 21, 2009

What Alex Pareene said

From Gawker:

Ugh. Shut up, bill-killing liberals. You know who has more liberal cred than all of you? Bernie Sanders, who secured $10 billion for community health and then voted for cloture.

He would prefer universal single-payer! He introduced an amendment to that end! It did not even make it to a vote, though, because of parliamentary tactics, whee. But he decided, “this bill will help poor and working people, and no bill will hurt them,” and so he is using his leverage to attempt to improve it, like a good socialist senator.

He is not throwing a tantrum (though he does get shouty sometimes!) and inventing a new reality in which this bill’s failure means we’ll totally get a better health care bill next year or something. I mean, what? The options are literally “pass this HANDOUT to the insurance industries (that they are still lobbying against!) that will insure millions of people and improve the social safety net for those in danger of losing their insurance” or “fuck off home to let people continue to die because we got super mad at Senator Fuckface from Connecticut.” There is not a third “Alan Grayson and Keith Olbermann and Matt Taibbi are all elected to a new kind of Senate that only needs three votes to pass legislation and they declare us Canada for Christmas” option.

[Hat tip TS who has more on HCR]

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/21/09 at 04:57 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBarack ObamaHealth CarePoliblogs

Tough words, Sheldon Whitehouse

I’ve never paid much attention to Sheldon Whitehouse, D-Rhode Island. He seems like a mild-mannered pol with a mild-mannered name to match. But dayum—Sheldon Whitehouse, ladies and gentlemen:

He needs to change his name to Stakedriver Wingerhammerer Von Dethhaus or something.

H/T: TPM

Posted by Betty Cracker on 12/21/09 at 01:40 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersHealth CareNutters

Coming Tomorrow: Rumproast’s Top 15 Music Videos of 2009 (Today: Honorable Mentions)

Because Rumproast is probably the only poliblog that posts new music videos on a regular basis and I’m doing everything possible to avoid all things political these days so that I don’t run around headbutting everyone, tomorrow I’m going to roll out my top 15 music video picks for the year. There were some exceptional music videos released this year, so it was hard to narrow it down to just fifteen. Presented below, in alphabetical order, are all of the fabulous videos that were in the running for best of the year, but sadly didn’t make the cut. Enjoy.

read the whole post »

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/21/09 at 11:15 AM
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Categories: MusicMusic VideosRumproast RelatedYouTubidity

Monday Morning Music: Leon Redbone & Dr. John’s “Frosty The Snowman”

Posted by Kevin K. on 12/21/09 at 07:12 AM
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Categories: MusicMusic VideosYouTubidity

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