Tuesday, August 03, 2010

Acronymony

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There are certainly more consequential annoyances, but for some reason, contrived acronyms irritate the crap outta me. Take the USA PATRIOT Act (please!). Most people these days refer to it simply as “the Patriot Act,” but it was originally conceived as a tortured acronym: “Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act.”

Who could vote against a bill so named? Well, those who claim to value civil liberties could have. But most didn’t since that might have conflicted with an even more fundamental goal: reelection.

And speaking of reelection, GOP crazy lady Michele Bachmann has come up with a contrived acronym of her own with which to christen her political money-raking outfit:

The chairwoman of the House Tea Party Caucus filed paperwork Friday to form a political action committee called “Many Individual Conservatives Helping Elect Leaders Everywhere.” The acronym is MICHELEPAC.

The committee hasn’t reported raising any money yet.

Bachmann is one of the top fundraisers in Congress. She’s collected more than $4.5 million this election cycle as she seeks a third term in Minnesota’s 6th District.

Forming a PAC is apparently the political equivalent of a Mama Grizzly rearing up on her hind legs to defend her cubs, the cubs being the political equivalent of a campaign war chest. So far as I can tell, Bachmann’s mentor, Sarah Palin, didn’t bother to come up with an acronym for her PAC, though “Simpletons Against Reason and Healthcare” might have done nicely.

As for Bachmann (whose mother, unlike First Lady Michelle Obama’s mother, did not realize that “Michelle” generally has two L’s), her acronym is even more tortured than the PATRIOT Act abomination. I think her PAC should be called “Morons in Congress Howling Evil Lies Eternally.” It’s no more elegant, but 100% more truthful.

Posted by Betty Cracker on 08/03/10 at 10:08 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersNuttersSarah PalinTeabaggery

Life Imitates Art: Basil Marceaux and Tommy Shanks

Uncanny.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 08/03/10 at 08:51 AM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '10NuttersTeabaggery

The New Agenda’s Walks of Shams

The New Agenda’s Amy Siskind yesterday at The Huffington Post (from a post originally titled “Is the GOP Becoming the Party of and for Women?”):

The sexism the 2008 election will forever change the political landscape. Millions of women voters, be they registered Democrats or newly-minted Independents, no longer feel that they have a home in the Democratic Party. If the Democratic Party does not yet realize this, the Republican Party does!

Ummm, yeah, they sure do:

JASON MATTERA, Human Events editor: “You know what gave Billl Clinton the most satisfaction when walking his daughter down the aisle? It wasn’t sending off Chelsea in holy matrimony. It was scoping out the talent in the room. As he’s walking down the aisle can’t you picture him contemplating, “I’ll take that honey at 1:05 AM. I’ll take that one thirty seconds later.” Then there’s the walk of shame back to his bed with Hillary. And getting in bed with Hillary is probably one of the biggest walks of shames [sic] there is.”

Posted by Kevin K. on 08/03/10 at 08:50 AM
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Categories: PoliticsNuttersSarah PalinPUMAsSkull HampersYouTubidity

Monday, August 02, 2010

Under the wigs, a formless void…

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Even I never imagined the teatards were this fucking dumb:

“Tea party” activists drawn to Williamsburg and its portrayal of Founding Fathers

WILLIAMSBURG—The original Tea Party may have been in Boston, but some modern-day “tea party” activists are finding a powerful narrative this summer at a different historic landmark: Colonial Williamsburg.

Amid the history buffs and parents with young children wandering along the crushed shell paths of Virginia’s restored colonial city, some noticeably angrier and more politically minded tourists can often be found.

[snip]

“They all should come here and listen,” said Bob Rohrbacher, a retired plumber from Floral Park, N.Y., who opposes President Obama and was inspired to visit Williamsburg while watching Glenn Beck on Fox News. “They’ve forgotten about America.”

Well, if Beck has to inspire the drooling halfwits who watch his show to take action, it’s better that they should visit Colonial Williamsburg than load an arsenal into their mother’s SUV to go kill a bunch of liberals.

The executives who oversee Williamsburg said they have noticed the influx of tea partiers, and have also noted a rise in the number of guests who ply the costumed actors for advice about how to rebel against 21st-century politicians. (The actors do their best to provide 18th-century answers.)

[snip]

Sometimes, the activists appear surprised when the Founding Fathers don’t always provide the “give ‘em hell” response they seem to be looking for.

I bet these morons corner Goofy for dog training tips when they go to Disney World.

Posted by Betty Cracker on 08/02/10 at 03:57 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersNuttersTeabaggery

Sarah Palin Writes Lies on Her Hand so Liberals Will Think She Knows What She’s Talking About*

Think again, Sarah.  After blathering incoherently about Jan Brewer’s cojones, Sarah tackles the subject of tax reform at about the 4 minute mark.

Where to begin to set her spew of wrongheaded drivel straight.

First of all George Bush signed the law that his tax cuts would expire in 10 years.  He did this so he could get the cuts passed through the Senate using (gasp!) reconciliation.  Letting any of the cuts expire is not a nefarious plot by the Dems. It’s something that has been scheduled to happen since the tax cut laws were enacted.

Second, as Chris Wallace helpfully reminds her, the Dems aren’t even touching the idea of letting all the cuts expire.  They’re targeting only the small tax increase on people whose net taxable income (and that’s after all their deductions, mind you) is more than a quarter of a million dollars ($200k in the case of single filers).  So we’re not talking about people whose gross pay is $250k, we’re talking about people who end up with that number after deducting the mortgage interest and taxes on their McMansions, the state taxes they pay, and the (hopefully) generous charitable donations they make.  People who are, in a word, wealthy.  Or quite comfortable if you want to look at it that way.

Third, they’re even considering retaining lower tax rates on dividends and long term capital gains, items which, frankly, do not figure heavily into calculating the taxable income of most middle and lower income Americans.

read the whole post »

Posted by marindenver on 08/02/10 at 02:30 PM
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Sharron Angle: Most. Stoned. Vegas. Lounge Act. Ever.

Here follows Starfleet Yeoman Sharron Angle’s speech at the RightOnline Conservative “counter-convention” to the recent Netroots gathering in Las Vegas.

Vegas has a long history of “dry” performers who pretended to be working “under the influence.” But Angle honestly looks like she flew in direct from the Day Room at the Haldol Institute for Advanced Psychosis-Management.

No need to watch the whole thing. 20 seconds or so will be all the corrective required to nuke the perception that Harry Reid is “dull” and “unassertive.”

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 08/02/10 at 01:11 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '10NuttersTeabaggery

Sarah Palin: Vile, Potty-Mouthed Priestess of Ignorance

“She walks. She talks. She reads off her hand and says ‘cojones.’”

Yeah, everybody else has covered this, and I was going to let it slide as just more of the same uninterrupted, content-free dial-tone from America’s Back-Seat Driver.

But the truth is, every time Palin uplinks to Fox, posts on Facebook or tweets the universe from her Arctic Fortress of Solipsism, she cheapens the nation’s political discourse. From “Death Panels” to “Lamestream Media” to her bigoted, brain-dead “refudiate” gaffe and her description of the Journolist participants as “yahoos,” she shames the Founders with her intellectual shallowness, while eliciting shouts of “You GO, girl!” from the driftwood barflies at my neighborhood watering-hole.

The only “Grizzly Mama” I ever met was a sideshow attraction at the Trumbull County Fair. And if this incoherent, gabbling teratism is what passes for Conservative leadership in 2010, we should throw a striped tent up over America’s midsection, and pass legislation guaranteeing free cotton candy and funnel cake for all registered Republicans.

Please forgive the rant. I just wanted to get this headline in the Google-stream. Beside, I found book-borers in my library over the weekend—a perfect metaphor for Palin—but it was just too fucking gross to build a post around.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 08/02/10 at 12:38 PM
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Categories: PoliticsNuttersSarah PalinTeabaggery

Best. Book. Review. Sentence. Ever.

From Elon Green’s review of Pamela Geller’s new book screecher The Post-American Presidency:

In another era, Pam Geller would be rotting away on Blackwell’s Island, counting cockroaches.

You know you want to read the rest...

Posted by Kevin K. on 08/02/10 at 07:33 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersNuttersPoliblogsPolisnarkSkull Hampers

Sunday, August 01, 2010

Laughingstock! Uni-Tea Speakers Outnumber Minori-Tea Listeners at Philly Blove-In

Dammit, Keep The Cameras On Me!
Here is mercifully short Part IV of Big Blightblurt’s monologue from yesterday’s grand gathering of peaceful Tea Partiers of every creed and color gaggle of Foxwatching paleopensioners.

There’s a half-hour of this stuff; I brought you the shortest clip, which goes conspiracy/Journolist/smear Mary Frances Berry, Big Gubmint’s newest out-of-contextual experiment in its drive to maintain the brand as go-to site for slandering black women.

Note the lack of interest in much larger crowd across the street, though comparison is difficult since the Bigs are not so much into showing their multicultural audience. At all. Talking Points Memo has a picture which pretty much echoes yesterday’s. Wee The Peepull run the gamut from A to B!

Posted by Mrs. Polly on 08/01/10 at 10:07 AM
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Categories: Knee SlappersPoliticsNuttersTeabaggery

Sudden, Brief, Unnamed Illness Spares Bachmann from Wrath of Missouri Tea Party Groups

According to the Minneapolis Star-Tribune:

U.S. Rep. Michele Bachmann canceled a scheduled campaign appearance in St. Louis on Saturday for GOP Senate candidate Roy Blunt after being hospitalized with an undisclosed illness.

The 54-year-old Minnesota Republican, who is serving her second term in Congress and running for a third, apparently was admitted to a Washington-area hospital Friday with what her office described as a “sudden illness.” She missed several votes on the Gulf oil spill just before the House adjourned for its August recess.

Fortunately, all appears to be well now, with Bachmann’s Web site posting an announcement that she is “currently resting…and on her way to a full and quick recovery.” A spokesman for her office said she planned to return to Minnesota on Saturday.

Quite coincidentally, it seems, missing her Missouri appearance with Rep. Blunt could be just what the doctored ordered…politically, anyway. Blunt is running against Tea Party favorite Chuck Purgason, a Missouri state senator. Bachmann’s official endorsement of Blunt—and the news of her plans to campaign with him this weekend—prompted 28 in-state Tea Party organizations to issue a joint message indicating that they were “shocked” by Bachmann’s actions, and suggesting that she had been “grossly misled” by Blunt:

Tea Party participants believe the spending in Washington has to STOP. Roy Blunt voted for TARP and Cash for Clunkers. For Michele Bachmann to come to Missouri and give the impression that all the Missouri Tea Parties support Roy Blunt is an abomination of everything we have been standing up for.

In addition to his support from various Tea Party groups, Purgason has been endorsed by celebrity non-entity Joe “the Plumber” Wurzelbacher.

Although Bachmann could not physically attend the St. Louis event, she was able to speak to Blunt’s campaign volunteers via Skype.

We wish Rep. Bachmann a speedy return to health…and a rapid rehabilitation of her “We the People” street-cred.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 08/01/10 at 01:36 AM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '10NuttersTeabaggery

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