Thursday, September 23, 2010

His name is Jerome Armstrong….

...and he is a very famous netroots blogger:

Since I am moderating, I got to decide the format, so we are skipping over the speechs and going straight into, after intro’s, the questions. Here’s what I came up with, let me know if you’ve any others you think I should add for the participants. Bowers, of course you know, Matt Lewis is a blogger over at Politics Daily.

Ha ha! What in the hell just happened there? Jerome’s skull is a centrifuge! That’s why things like this happen on his online activism thing-that-exists! Democracy saved! *fart*

[hat tip YAFB for the horrible, horrible Jack Landsman link via Nick]

Posted by Kevin K. on 09/23/10 at 08:33 PM
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Palin/McKenzie 2012?

I always knew that America’s Back-Seat Driver™ reminded me of somebody. But it took TPM’s most-hysterical-screencap-ever to bring my repressed latent memories to the surface.

Apparently, she also said some goofy stuff about Obama, but who really gives a fuck? I’m tired of caring about a racist, low-brow celebutard who has to scrunch up her face in order to think.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 09/23/10 at 06:33 PM
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Categories: PoliticsNuttersSarah PalinTeabaggery

Repubs Draft Pledge to (Destroy?) America

And it’s 21 whole pages long!  Now how, you might ask, could the Pubbies maintain that kind of concentration level long enough to draft 21 whole pages of detailed, comprehensive, forward looking policy that they are now offering up as a “Pledge” to Wee the Peeples? 

Well let me ask you this.  How many of you crammed out a 21 page term paper the night before it was due by making creative use of spacing, repeating your central thesis as many times as possible, throwing in a lot of random quotes and unsubstantiated assertions and generally just bull shitting your way through it?  Now we have the gist of the Pledge to America!!

OK let’s sift through the window dressing, quotes, unattributed assertions (ex.  “An unchecked executive, a compliant legislature, and an overreaching judiciary have combined to thwart the will of the people and overturn their votes and their values, striking down long-standing laws and institutions and scorning the deepest beliefs of the American people.”) and see what the essence of this document boils down to.  If you can stomach it and want to read along with me it’s right here.

read the whole post »

Posted by marindenver on 09/23/10 at 04:35 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBarack ObamaElection '10Nutters

Fiorina Slams Uppity Womenfolk for Demanding Respect

Seriously. You give some haughty bitch a title and she acts like a Black Man with Fuzzy Hat and a Cadillac:

Not at all like easygoing, self-possessed Carly, who no doubt invited her staffers to call her “Cottage-Cheese Cheeks” while she was shipping their jobs to Bangalore:

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 09/23/10 at 10:13 AM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '10

Reflections on REFLECTIVE

Congresswoman Michele Bachmann gets lumped in with fellow bug-eyed loon Sarah Palin a lot. It’s understandable—both are god-bothering wingnut ladies with longish brown hair who tar political opponents with McCarthyesque charges of Un-Americanism in similar tundra-twang accents.

But I’m not sure the comparison is entirely fair to Bachmann, who is, after all, an elected official who shows no signs of abandoning her post. And while Palin disgorges Teapublican boilerplate interspersed with random gerunds when she opens her gob, Bachmann generally speaks in recognizable sentences. It must be her legal training.

However, in the clip above, it’s clear that a particular Teapublican Pledge talking point has worked itself into Bachmann’s hide like a tick on a hound dog: REFLECTIVE! The Tax Cuts for Jeebus and Fetuses Pledge is REFLECTIVE of the Declaration of Independence (twice). It is also REFLECTIVE of the will of Wee the Pipple (twice). The latter point is amplified by the obligatory reference to “taking our country back.”

The more the GOP throws its lot in with the teatard movement, the more hopeful I feel about the midterm elections and beyond.

[H/T: National Review Online]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 09/23/10 at 07:56 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersElection '10NuttersSarah PalinTeabaggeryYouTubidity

Crawling dog

image

This dog likes to crawl around on her belly for some reason. She’ll crawl clear across the house, over carpet, tile, whatever. I guess it’s easier than just getting up and walking like a normal dog.

PS: She has a tail. You just can’t see it because she’s wagging it so fast.

Posted by Betty Cracker on 09/23/10 at 07:15 AM
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Categories: Critters

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

“Dreck”: RedState’s Erickson Not Impressed with New GOP “Pledge to America”

Erick bin Erick isn’t happy with the much-ballyhooed successor to Newt Gingrich’s “Contract With America.” And for once I agree with him, at least in his umbrella assessment.

TPM has the full preview text in annoying Scribd format

At 21 pages, it’s a ponderous, sleep-inducing read that intersperses geriatric Conservative boilerplate and Sarahnoid references to an “arrogant,” “out-of-touch,” “elite” rulership that “scorns” Real American Values™ with a Rock-Ola jukebox selection of Every Conservative Talking Point That Ever Got a Round of Applause at a Fundraising Dinner.

The motivational magic of the original Contract With America was that you could print the whole thing, legibly, on a single large piece of posterboard. The Pledge, in contrast, is longer—and less inspiring—than the manual for my HP printer.

Just be grateful the Founding Fathers didn’t draft the Declaration of Independence as a PowerPoint presentation, or no one would have read past the first of couple of pie charts.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 09/22/10 at 07:57 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '10

No, No, No—ABJURE the Snark and EMBRACE the Fear!

Millions for hairshirts and sandwich-boards, but not one penny for snark!

Because, as Mark Twain observed, “Humor is the last refuge of people who don’t realize how fucking serious this shit is.”

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 09/22/10 at 01:40 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '10NuttersTeabaggeryOur Stupid Media

Behold the Power of Snark

To continue the fascinating discussion in comments here, I propose the following thought experiment:

Say you have a mouth-breathing, ditto-head brother-in-law who is considering an automobile purchase. Which of the following bumper stickers is likely to compel him to choose a more environmentally friendly vehicle?

Hummers are unhealthy for children and other living things.

OR

Big truck = Small dick

Respect the snark.

Posted by Betty Cracker on 09/22/10 at 01:00 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '10NuttersTeabaggeryOur Stupid Media

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Palin Endorses Real Piece O’ Work in Texas 30th District Race

Sarah says Pastor Stephen Broden’s inner-city Dallas ministry, which helps 75-100 low-income youths annually, has proved that “private charities can do much more than government can.” (Yeah, right.) What she neglects to mention is that he’s completely insane. Too bad the Democratic candidate has issues of her own.

It took me a minute to reverse-engineer Broden’s rhetorical style, but I was able to trace it back to this Master Orator of my youth:

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 09/21/10 at 10:25 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '10NuttersSarah PalinTeabaggery

Teabaggin’ NY Gubernatorial Candidate Carl Paladino’s New Campaign Ad

Okay, I lied. But in reality there’s not a lot of distance between Paladino and Alec Cauch (video warning: BAD EVERYTHING). Way to go, GOP!

If the NY Republicans wanted someone to really kick ass in Albany (baseball bats are for pussies), they should have nominated Charles Manson. He’s still alive. I looked it up on the Googles. Put the tea on! Helter Kettle!

Posted by Kevin K. on 09/21/10 at 08:32 PM
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They Call Me MISTER Homo!: Extended Footage of Breitbart Courageously Annoying a Crowd of Strangers

God help me, I just can’t get enough of this. The notorious “spitting” sequence—which was implied if not exactly “captured” by a second, cell-phone camera—is absent from this pro-quality cut. Otherwise, the video conveys all the breathless drama of a posturing ponce with a serious case of Geraldo-envy futilely goading a group of mostly-indifferent people in the desperate hope that someone will hit him with a shillelagh on-camera. 

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 09/21/10 at 06:24 PM
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Categories: PoliticsNuttersTeabaggeryOur Stupid Media

The Republicans hate the troops

Well, not really. They just hate homos more than they love the troops, so they were willing to filibuster the sacred Defense Appropriations Bill because it contained a repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell.

I hope Cindy McCain spikes McCranky’s Metamucil. And fuck you, Jim Webb.

UPDATE:
Oops—apologies to Senator Webb, who voted for cloture. The above “fuck you” is hereby transferred to Senators Blanche Lincoln and Mark Pryor, both allegedly Democrats of Arkansas. [H/T: Allan]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 09/21/10 at 03:31 PM
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Categories: LGBTPoliticsBedwettersNutters

Boxcar Mamas: Palin, O’Donnell Murder Karl Rove in Graphic Taiwanese Snuff Film

Like Jerry Lewis, America’s comic surreality is only appreciated overseas.

This one’s worth it just for Christine O’Donnell’s anti-masturbation lesson.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 09/21/10 at 02:40 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '10NuttersSarah PalinTeabaggeryYouTubidity

A day late and a Twit short

Slow to recover from last night’s soiree with the stars, Mama Grizzly regained consciousness, stretched, swept the remains of last night’s moose offal and bumpit off of the rumpled bearskin bedthrow, reached for her Blackberry and checked out what was going on in the big bad world.

The first thing that caught her eye thanks to her serfs’ efforts was a delightful article by someone called Shushannah Walshe in a furrin newspaper called The Independent that said she was gonna be prezzydint one day. Too many words. That would have to wait. There were lefties that needed ruffin up.

Her nails clattered on her Blackberry keyboard.

image

Ha! That’d show ‘em.

read the whole post »

Posted by YAFB on 09/21/10 at 01:07 PM
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