Thursday, January 27, 2011

PALIN SOTU POTUS WTF FTW STFU!

Spittle guards, earplugs, padded desks, and gags at the ready ... She’s BAAAAACK. And potty-mouthed. Good to see that Fox felt a foil hat wasn’t enough and went for the full foil jacket this time.

Also. SPUDNUTS! It’s the new WOLVERINES! Dunkin’ yer way to prosperity, America.

More at Media Matters if you can take it without pulverizing your computer or coughing up a tonsil. [Irony Trigger Alert]

h/t Allan

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Posted by YAFB on 01/27/11 at 12:36 AM
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Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Republican Official Party Line:  “We Hate The Unemployed”

Paul Ryan’s idea of a typical unemployed person:

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Last night Rep. Paul Ryan, R-WI, gave the official Republican rebuttal to the State of the Union address delivered by President Barack Obama.  It’s important to emphasize that this was the Republican party line response and not a rogue response such as Michele Bachmann’s Tea Party number.  Presumably the speech was reviewed and vetted by the party brass.  So I guess we can also presume that this excerpt represents official Republican thinking:

We are at a moment, where if government’s growth is left unchecked and unchallenged, America’s best century will be considered our past century. This is a future in which we will transform our social safety net into a hammock, which lulls able-bodied people into lives of complacency and dependency.

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Posted by marindenver on 01/26/11 at 03:57 PM
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SOTU Responses: Little Munsters

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Two observations:

1) The Ryan Roadmap will come back to bite the GOP on the ass. Better to just mumble something about the dog eating their homework than to tacitly endorse a plan that is electoral suicide.

2) The tea party will have to un-friend Bachmann, change its cell phone number and eventually move to a different city to get rid of her.

UPDATE: Who broke the Palin? Tumbleweeds on Twitter. Facebook forsaken. Is she done, folks?

ANOTHER UPDATE: You know what’s really quite remarkable? Obama said the following:

Our troops come from every corner of this country -– they’re black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American.  They are Christian and Hindu, Jewish and Muslim.  And, yes, we know that some of them are gay.  Starting this year, no American will be forbidden from serving the country they love because of who they love.

And it was considered largely unremarkable.

Posted by Betty Cracker on 01/26/11 at 07:59 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBushCoNuttersTeabaggeryOur Stupid Media

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

State Of The Union Open Thread

Kumbayunion

Awwww, the amity is so thick in there you could cut it with a knife! Open thread, live blog, have at it, agents of O-struction!

Posted by Mrs. Polly on 01/25/11 at 08:43 PM
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Categories: ImagesNewsPoliticsBarack ObamaElection '12

Me-Three Mitt

As you know, the official GOP response to President Obama’s State of the Union speech will be delivered by Paul “Roadmap to Galt’s Gulch” Ryan. Michele “I Can Lick the Beaters While the Electric Mixer Is Running!” Bachmann will project her pin-wheeling irises through the screen to pin teatards to their sofas and deliver the short bus rebuttal.

But that’s not all! We learn via the extra-precious Mitt Romney Central site that their man plans to deliver a State of the Union response on Sean Hannity’s show tomorrow:

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I don’t think that’s really fair to Ryan and Bachmann as Romney will have an additional 24 hours to prepare. But hey, I’m not Hannity’s booking agent.

However, I am wildly curious about the above mentioned “BINGO and Chat Party during tonight’s address.” Are they not allowed to participate in alcoholic beverage drinking games like everyone else on account of Mitt being a Mormon? Oh well, more for the rest of us!

Posted by Betty Cracker on 01/25/11 at 05:19 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '08Election '12MittensNuttersTeabaggeryOur Stupid Media

(Preemptive) Shorter Bachmann

A preview of Congresswoman Michele Bachmann’s State of the Union Response:

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Obviously, she’ll still need a teleprompter.

Posted by Betty Cracker on 01/25/11 at 10:39 AM
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Categories: PoliticsNuttersTeabaggery

Monday, January 24, 2011

Tim Pawlenty 2012: “Ask Not What Stock Footage Can Do For You”

You don’t know his name. You don’t know his face. But, damn—anyone who fought at Valley Forge, marched with MLK and went to the moon is plenty fucking presidential in my book.

[Via TPM]

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 01/24/11 at 08:05 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '12

Separated at birth?

They don’t look alike, but Rush Limbaugh and Fidel Castro have a lot in common:

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This occurred to me the other day while reading a Limbaugh-related Balloon Juice thread.

Posted by Betty Cracker on 01/24/11 at 04:35 PM
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Categories: PoliticsNuttersOur Stupid Media

Senate Tea Party Caucus hopes to increase membership 33%

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Since there are only three TPC members at present, all that would take would be the expected addition of new FL Senator Marco Rubio. But after riding the tea party bandwagon into DC, long-time Florida statehouse hack Rubio doesn’t seem to be that into them:

[Tea Party Express chairman Amy] Kremer, who said the tea party movement is aimed at ``sending conservatives to Washington, not Republicans,’’ acknowledged a ``little bit of disappointment’’ that it appears Rubio ``won’t be standing with Sen. DeMint, Lee and Paul.

``Ultimately what matters is his vote, but there is concern,’’ Kremer said. ``All these new members should know that we are watching. If anybody thinks they can play this movement, that’s not going to happen. We’re watching what they say, what they do.’‘

Like they haven’t already been played? That’s precious.

Posted by Betty Cracker on 01/24/11 at 07:20 AM
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Categories: NewsPoliticsElection '10NuttersTeabaggery

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Geller Accuses Obama of Planning to Ethnically Cleanse Israel of Jews

...based entirely, of course, on anonymous sources speculating on the always-accurate DebkaFile news site.

Fortunately, Pam’s readers aren’t nearly as pychotic as she is. Oh, wait:

We must pray for Obama’s death . Pray to Adonai. Pray that the POS dies a horrible death from cancer

Note to Pam: Whether or not Obama vetoes the UN Resolution condemning further Jewish settlements in the West Bank and East Jerusalem, a Second Holocaust isn’t part of the equation. Oh, and if you don’t mind, we Communists prefer to use the term “ethnic freshening.”

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 01/23/11 at 04:44 PM
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Categories: PoliticsNuttersWar In Error

State-of-the-NFL-Playoffs-Open-Thread-Union Address Opposition Response

Please continue to comment on KK’s shitty thread below. I’m just exercising my version of the Fairness Doctrine.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 01/23/11 at 03:29 PM
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Categories: Sports

NFL Playoffs Open Thread

Chicago Bears vs. Green Bay Packers at 3:00 PM ET and then a repeat of this…

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..when the New York Jets defeat the Pittsburgh Steelers in the 6:30 game. (Strange probably disagrees with me about this.)

This thread is dedicated to J. (the “J” is for Jets).

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Posted by Kevin K. on 01/23/11 at 02:45 PM
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Categories: Sports

The creeping censorship of bipartisan seating arrangements

Rep. Paul Broun (R-Nuttier-than-a-Squirrel-Turd) isn’t going to sit next to no stinkin’ Democrat during the upcoming State of the Union address:

I already believe very firmly that it is a trap and a ruse that Democrats are proposing. They don’t want civility. They want silence from the Republicans. And the sitting together being kissy-kissy is just another way to try to silence Republicans, and also to show — to keep the American people from seeing how few of them there are in the U.S. House now. Then when people stand up to — what the Democrats are going to be doing when Barack Obama spews out all his venom, then, um, if they’re scattered throughout all the Republicans, then it won‘t be as noticeable as if we’re sitting apart. So it is a ruse and I‘m not in favor of it and I’m talking about it and I hope other members of the Republican conference in the House will not take the bait.

Broun, as you may recall, is the birther-curious congressman who accused Obama of being a Marxist and radical socialist who is trying to orchestrate a secret domestic military force just like Hitler and the Soviet Union did.

It’s a shame Boehner didn’t designate Broun to deliver the GOP rebuttal. Maybe next time.

[H/T: Beck’s House o’ Crazy]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 01/23/11 at 07:51 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBarack ObamaBedwettersNutters

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Rep. Giffords’ gun pØrn-purveying former opponent: What? Too soon?

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Actually, that does look like a RINO to me, where “RINO” is an acronym for Repulsive, Ignoble, Noxious Opportunist:

As you might expect, if you visit the website of Jesse Kelly, the ex-Marine Tea Partyer who challenged Gabrielle Giffords in last November’s election, you will find a simple message expressing sympathy for the congresswoman and her family. And, also as you might expect, if you ask Kelly’s spokesman, as the Los Angeles Times did, you’ll hear that he’s interested only in his former opponent making a full recovery.

But behind the scenes, the story appears to be a little different. Per Ben Smith, Arizona Capitol Reports, a subscription-only insider newsletter, reported this week that Attorney Lee Miller, who serves as legal counsel for the Arizona Republican Party, told our reporter Kelly’s campaign contacted him earlier this week to find out how the seat would be filled if Giffords couldn’t serve….

Remember, this is the clown who lured his mouth-breathing supporters to a campaign event last year with an invitation to “Get on Target for Victory in November Help remove Gabrielle Giffords from office Shoot a fully automatic M15 with Jesse Kelly.” Classy bunch, those teatards.

PS: Rumproast pal Allan is encouraging folks who were offended by Rush Limbaugh’s latest racist antics to contact gutless shitweasel Mitch McConnell to request that McConnell address it, since McConnell’s wife and children are Asian Americans. Of course, we all know the answer to that. But it couldn’t hurt to add your voice to the request. Details here

Posted by Betty Cracker on 01/22/11 at 09:23 AM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '10NuttersTeabaggery

Friday, January 21, 2011

If you thought Paul Ryan was a bad choice for SOTU rebuttal, how about MICHELE BACHMANN!!

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Thanks to the Tea Party Express we not only get to hear radical *fiscal genius* Paul Ryan give his take on Pres. Obama’s State of the Union Address next Tuesday but we also get to hear REALLY crazy shit right after that!

Thanks progressives!*

Of course there is at least a chance that both of them will be so awful they will pretty much end their political careers.

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Posted by marindenver on 01/21/11 at 10:38 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBarack ObamaElection '10NuttersTeabaggery

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