Sunday, June 26, 2011

Fouling the waters

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Rich politicelebrity Mike Huckabee, whose official residence is a multimillion-dollar Florida beach house, simply cannot understand why Governor Rick Scott is less popular than butt acne:

“You’re doing a lot of things people had hoped you would do, and yet (your) approval rating recently has not been steller [sic],” Huckabee said. “And I’m stunned as to why.”

And Scott is doing a lot of things Florida residents such as Rush Limbaugh, Matt Drudge and Ann Coulter hoped he would do, like attempting to auction off disabled orphans’ crutches and wheelchairs to zero out one of the nation’s lowest corporate tax rates and completing the pauperization of the state’s already impoverished public school system.

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Posted by Betty Cracker on 06/26/11 at 08:29 AM
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Saturday, June 25, 2011

Rumproast Challenge: Draft this Headless Recriprocating Tactile Torso to Primary Obama from the Left

Sense-Roid is the Ultimate Progressive Candidate, because it does exactly what you would do, if you were doing it to yourself. Plus, it can’t talk back or run away, which means it will always be your Special Friend.

[H/T Mrs. Polly for the above clip, which will be a terrific first campaign spot once we lose the Japanese guy and add a ‘70s wah-wah guitar track.]

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/25/11 at 05:46 PM
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“A Man Can Be Wiser Today Than Yesterday” - Four Republicans’ Equality Vote

New York State Senator Mark Grisanti made possibly the speech of the night, in a night of speeches both moving and, in the case of one particular asshat, incomprehensible (See GOP Senator Stephen Saland wrestle with Diaz, followed by the roll call vote, cheers, and more Diaz asshattery below the jump):

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Posted by Mrs. Polly on 06/25/11 at 02:22 PM
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Categories: LGBTPoliticsElection '12Relijun

Haters eat bitter hate pellets

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I’m sure it’s indicative of some awful character flaw, but I must admit I’m enjoying the homophobes’ consternation about New York’s shiny new marriage equality law almost as much as I’m enjoying the fact that the measure passed.

Are you a terrible person too? Then come sit by me, and let’s take a short schadenfreude tour…

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Posted by Betty Cracker on 06/25/11 at 09:15 AM
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Categories: LGBTNewsPoliticsBedwettersNutters

Friday, June 24, 2011

NY GAY MARRIAGE BILL PASSED

About Time

Please see Strange’s thread below for as-it-happened reactions of joy, retraction, joy again, plus a damned good argument against any kind of marriage.

But now, snark-free, hooray and amen. Can’t wait to see the happy couples lining up at City Hall.

**UPDATE** The Empire State shows her colors (For Gay Pride, she would usually be just Lavender):

H/T: xecky gilchrist & JMG

Posted by Mrs. Polly on 06/24/11 at 09:56 PM
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Categories: LGBTNews

Date Night Open Thread

Because we’re all looking for someone who’s no damn good.

[UPDATE:] Might as well call this the Equal Marriage Act Passes New York State Senate Open Thread. The deed is done.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/24/11 at 07:58 PM
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Categories: Messylaneous

House Rejects Obama’s Authority to Continue Military Action In Libya, Funds It Anyway

Rejects authority.

Maintains funding.

This is driving the folks at The Blaze crazy.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/24/11 at 02:36 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBarack Obama

RIP Peter Falk

Wishing he would get up and say, “Oh, by the way, there’s just one more thing…”

[H/T to Oblomova for the video clip. And right back atcha.]

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/24/11 at 02:00 PM
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Categories: MoviesMovie News

Tea Party-Produced Soap Opera Makes Colonial America Even More Boring Than Previously Thought

It opens like an 18th-century version of “The Honeymooners,” but don’t expect the memorable tagline from “Courage, New Hampshire” to be “POW! — To the moon, Constance Asquith!” 

“I’d like to concentrate on some of the regular folk who made the Revolution possible,” James Patrick Riley, the man behind the show and its production company, told The Hollywood Reporter (THR), “mix the narrative tension of The Sopranos and the redemptive, heroic American exceptionalism of Frank Capra.”

“Most TV sitcoms and dramas tend to depict conservatives and traditionalists and people of faith as halfwits. That tactic lost its edge about four decades ago and we think it’s time to turn the tables,” he added.

Yeah, four decades ago is right about when Ned Flanders stopped being hysterical. Or maybe Riley is talking about Exidor.

Personally, I think “See here, Sergeant. I’ve been paid to gut and clean the King’s fish” is the “Go ahead. Make my day” of agenda-driven, post-realist cosplay screensavers. Plus, reviving the chapterized theatrical release model of the old Republic serials could give C,NH the most innovative distribution bootstrapping strategy since Atlas Shrugged....or Radar Men from the Moon, anyway.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/24/11 at 12:38 PM
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Categories: PoliticsNuttersTeabaggeryTelevision

Why God Invented PowerPoint

Because illustrating “pork spending” with a colorful pie-chart is less work than hauling around an entire dead, burnt pig.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/24/11 at 11:18 AM
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Categories: PoliticsSkull Hampers

Failure to Launch

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Combining a Mike Gravel-style campaign ad strategy and a Giulianian focus on winning states that start with an “F” and end with a “lorida,” the Huntsman 2012 campaign is a juggernaut:

“How cool is it to be making history: the first Republican presidential campaign to be headquartered in Florida,’’ the former ambassador to China told more than 100 people gathered to see him at a downtown Orlando office building.“Florida is where this race is going to be won by the Huntsman campaign.”

Jeebus. Didn’t anyone warn Huntsman about launching a campaign in Orlando during the “Tot Mom” trial?

Posted by Betty Cracker on 06/24/11 at 07:01 AM
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Thursday, June 23, 2011

Tea Party Group Aims to Exceptionalize the Solar System

We must stop them on Earth, before they can carry their Evil to the Stars.

Volunteers needed, orphans preferred.

No one can figure out exactly what they want, but their platform seems to envision a future where Starfleet Command is run by the Chamber of Commerce, rather than the United Federation of Planets:

For American values to spread throughout the solar system, the United States government must strongly support and utilize free-market principles in how it promotes the settlement of space.  Government agencies including FAA/AST, DOD (including DARPA), and NASA must become a partner of commercial entities and facilitator of market emergence and growth.  These government agencies must also develop sound economic policies for commissioning new missions, project management, and technology development.  Robust free-market competition has been objectively shown to be the most cost-effective means of producing and procuring goods and services.

Naturally, this will require modest amounts of tricky transuranics, unless ion thruster technology is determined to be more patriotic:

NASA shall partner with the Department of Energy (DOE) and immediately resume production of plutonium (238Pu) to be utilized in outer solar system exploration.

Space, the Final Franchise Opportunity.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/23/11 at 08:58 PM
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Categories: Geek SpeakPoliticsNuttersTeabaggery

No Sudan Charity Trip for Palin

Looks like July is no good for Christian Missionary photo-ops with starving children in Africa. She must be a juror on one of those big-ass murder cases that takes forever. Oh, wait — July is when The Unfeated premieres.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/23/11 at 02:46 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '12NuttersSarah PalinTeabaggeryRelijun

Quarterback-In-Chief: Limbaugh Recycles Donovan McNabb Line In Obama Rant

Just heard it, so no audio clip yet. But Rush moments ago stated that the media is giving Obama a pass on the economy because everybody wants to see a “Black President” succeed.

For those who don’t recall, this is the line that got El Rushbo ejected from ESPN:

“Sorry to say this, I don’t think he’s been that good from the get-go,” Limbaugh said. “I think what we’ve had here is a little social concern in the NFL. The media has been very desirous that a black quarterback do well. There is a little hope invested in McNabb, and he got a lot of credit for the performance of this team that he didn’t deserve. The defense carried this team.”

I’m sure I’m not the only one who caught this, so hopefully we’ll have the sound bite later.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/23/11 at 12:34 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBarack ObamaOur Stupid Media

Obama Releases 4% of Strategic Oil Reserve in Attempt to Destroy America, Install Global Caliphate

I personally can’t say whether this is a good and necessary measure to quash price speculation, but the immediate effect didn’t suck.

However, I’m pleased to report that Republicans and people who sell oil think this was a shitty, cynical idea, so there’s every reason to believe it’s a smart, short-term reponse to a volatile market environment.

[UPDATE:] Traders call Obama’s move “genius.”

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/23/11 at 11:49 AM
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Categories: NewsPoliticsBarack Obama

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