...But I Won’t Ass Hat

What’s the craziest thing you ever did for love?

Admit it, you’ve played the fool. Everybody does sometimes, sang Aaron Neville, who also claims not to know much except that he loves Linda Ronstadt, and in a shocking endorsement of ignorance maintains that’s all he needs to know, so either his awareness of his love for Linda Ronstadt crowded everything else out, or he was just guessing that everybody plays the fool sometimes, it wasn’t based on any kind of peer-reviewed research into fool-playing.

Damn it, Neville! You have the voice of an angel but you’ve used it to lure me into a black hole of abject confusion! And I’m not talking about the mole!

Unrequited love, now, that’s the one that gets most of us into trouble. Who among us hasn’t made a spectacle of themselves in pursuit of the unattainable? And rejection, oof, that’s a hard pill to swallow. It’s like getting a form letter back after submitting unsolicited cartoons to The New Yorker, except instead of a line-drawing of humorous goings-on inside a psychiatrist’s office, it’s you as a sexual being they have no use for at this time, though they appreciate your interest.

So again I ask, but rephrasing slightly: What’s the craziest thing love ever made you do? Grade your shame on a scale from playing “In Your Eyes” on a boombox outside your beloved’s window to this insane immolation of dignity.

Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on 02/18/12 at 10:18 PM • Permalink

Categories: Music • Politics • Nutters • Sarah Palin • YouTubidity •

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Craziest thing I ever did for love? Marry.

Comment by Bill on 02/19/12 at 01:15 AM

Zeigler made an investment in Palin. (He claims) he spent his entire savings promoting her of his own accord and thought he’d hop on her gravy train. Sadly, he still has a glimmer of hope that will happen.

Comment by Bob Stanley on 02/19/12 at 10:15 AM

I Karaoke’ed In Your Eyes to my now-wife before singing In Your Eyes was cool/lame. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house (music lovers, apparently).

I was struck by Zeigler’s

The integrity of Fox News and the credibility of the entire Republican primary process are on the line here.

Really? Non-entities don’t exist and nothing can place non-entities at risk.

Comment by xulon on 02/19/12 at 11:44 AM

Not an answer to your query, gil mann, but I love your posts. And that may be all I need to know.

Comment by KRK on 02/19/12 at 06:55 PM

I was struck by Zeigler’s

Oh thank God that was leading up to a quote. For a second there I thought we had a Goldstein situation.

KRK, I can’t tell you how much I appreciate that. No, really, I can’t, due to my congenital inability to take a friggin’ compliment.

Comment by gil mann on 02/19/12 at 10:40 PM

Hmm, I’ve been married (very happily, still) for so long that I can’t remember an example to lay at the feet of your query, so I’ll just say that I agree with KRK.

Comment by StringOnAStick on 02/20/12 at 12:00 AM

Tried to learn how to ski. Decided he wasn’t really worth it.

Also, what KRK and SoaS said. And I cannot hear a Talking Heads song without thinking of gil’s New Yorker cartoon, then laughing my ass off.

Comment by Nancy in Detroit on 02/20/12 at 11:45 AM

Love made me move to Canada, change universities, and then seriously consider cancelling as best man at my best friend’s wedding. It was while I was considering that last possibility that I realized that the relationship might not be a healthy one.

Comment by Lowkey on 02/20/12 at 02:39 PM

Stick & Nance, you’re too kind. Now I gotta go over to LG&M and pose as a Green just to get the hatin’ I crave. It’s my comfort zone!

Lowkey, that hurts just reading it, man. Hope you’re past it now.

It’s not precisely an answer to the question, but as I’m currently failing to talk myself out of going to an NPR speed-dating event on Wednesday, the potential to out-cringeworthy all of you is huge.