All God’s Children Need Guns


On Sunday it just seems right to check up on what’s shaking in the Wonderful World of Christianists.  Today, since the buzz is all about guns lately, I figured I’d tune into Tim Donnelly’s recent pronouncement regarding the role of guns in God’s master plan. 

According to Tim, God is all about guns:

They are used to defend our property and our families and our faith and our freedom, and they are absolutely essential to living the way God intended for us to live.

That came on the heels of Donnelly blasting President Obama for “politicizing this tragedy to impose an anti-Second Amendment agenda that would have done nothing to prevent the tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary.”

Donnelly gets to weigh in on the President’s actions because he is a Republican California Assemblyman, (R-Twin Peaks) [Really].  A very rare bird, indeed, in deep “blue” California.  Donnelly, elected in 2010 during the TEA Party mania, represents one of California’s few remaining “pink streaks”—District 33/ San Berdoo— a weird little corridor gerrymandered into existence as part of the GOP’s “life support” efforts and highly susceptible to Donnelly’s primarily anti-illegal immigration platform.

Prior to launching his political career, Donnelly became involved with the Minuteman movement, and founded the Minuteman Party in California.  Here’s how he spins it in his bio:

In 2005, Tim answered the call of his country, and joined the fight to secure our borders. As the founder of the largest Minuteman chapter in California, he leveraged the media to bring national attention to the Federal government’s failure to enforce the border. Since then, Congress voted against amnesty, to improve the border fence and double the Border Patrol presence. The American public is acutely aware of the drug war, which has claimed over 40,000 lives in 4 years, and the violence that has spilled over the border into California.

So.  Now we have a better idea where Assy. Donnelly [seriously, that’s the official abbreviation for “assemblyman] is coming from—he’s a good Christian, gun-toting vigilante who’s decided to serve his country in a legislative role.

Unfortunately, one of Donnelly’s first, and most colorful, acts in office was to “break” the law, rather than “make” the law. 

That’s right:

On January 4, 2012, Donnelly was discovered with a loaded .45-caliber Colt Mark IV pistol while attempting to board an airplane. TSA security screeners discovered a loaded Colt handgun in his carry-on luggage along with an additional loaded clip.

Now, all due respect, Assy. Donnelly, but that’s just plum stupid.  Since 9/11, who actually “forgets” that they have a loaded gun in their carry-on briefcase?  Seriously? 

On top of that, it turns out that Assy. Donnelly doesn’t actually have permit to carry a concealed weapon ANYWHERE—let alone onto an airplane.

Donnelly’s defense:

Due to his selfless stint in the “laboratories of Democracy,” Donnelly receives a lot of death threats.  He’s not saying that they come from illegal aliens but he did note that they started when he launched a legislative effort to repeal California’s DREAM Act.  Just sayin’ . . .

So, like all good “minutemen” he carries a shootin’ arn at all times.  But don’t tell his wife because he’s tried to save her the anxiety.  Evidently, he also tried to spare California’s Capitol Security anxiety as well.

. . . despite Donnelly’s claim about receiving death threats, neither the offices of the California Assembly speaker nor the sergeant at arms, which provides security for members, said he’s reported any such threats to them or requested extra security, according to the LA Times.

Well.  It’s been an eventful couple of years for Assy. Donnelly but, undaunted, he plans to forge ahead because he’s obviously taken a shine to politicking.  Recently Donnelly launched an exploratory committee for a run at ousting Gov. Jerry Brown from the California governor’s mansion in 2014.  He’s billing himself as a “Patriot, Not a Politician.”

I guess that’s better than “Patriot, Not Rocket Scientist”?

Good luck with that, Assy. Donnelly.  But, piece of advice . . . Tell your wife.  God would want it that way.

Here’s a little video bonus to get to know Tim just a little better . . .

The Colbert Report
Get More: Colbert Report Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,Video Archive

Posted by Bette Noir on 01/20/13 at 09:31 AM • Permalink

Categories: PoliticsNuttersTeabaggery

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Hmm-I never was much for Sunday school, so I guess I forgot the bit in Genesis when God gave rifles to Adam and Eve, advising them to “be shootful and mutiply.”

Noah clearly had high-powered rifles aboard the ark.  It’s why we don’t have any dinosaurs or unicorns today.

Yea, God’s whole thing about love thy neighbor and peace and turn the other cheek needs guns.


Yeah, I can see it now, Robin Hood is makin’ his arrows, and God is there, chastising him for not inventing gunpowder earlier. But then again Robin is just as bad a Redistributionist as Jesus, so he’ll sacrifice him too.

Due to his selfless stint in the “laboratories of Democracy,” Donnelly receives a lot of death threats.

Those death threats… they’re coming… from inside your head!

I remember the days when the only minutemen in California were good guys.

Noah clearly had high-powered rifles aboard the ark.  It’s why we don’t have any dinosaurs or unicorns today.

@Craig HS HEH! you’re going to fit right in here . . .

I’ve been lurking for almost a year now, love this blog!

I must admit though, I am a God-botherer.  And crap like this annoys the heck outta me.  When Jesus went into the temple and overthrew the money-lenders tables and generally got QUITE irate, he did it with a hand-crafted whip, not an AK-47.  Somehow, these morons miss that.

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