America the Asinine

It’s official: Sarah Palin will be the 45th President of the United States…unless she runs against a pair of Yosemite Sam mudflaps or a “Big Mouth Billy Bass” that sings the theme from Convoy.

Nothing says “serious political movement” like a bug-eyed cartoon portrait of a famously married woman and mother-of-five, dressed for Mall-Babe Night at the Mattress Olympics and holding a length of rope with a giant teabag where the noose usually goes. Inspiring…and kitschy.

I’m not sure if this is the new brand packaging for Wasilla’s Best™ Pure Alaskan Stove-Top Meth (“It’s Cheaply, Abundantly Polarizing!”) or the cover of Glenn Beck’s new book on the Founding Fathers’ obsession with monster trucks and erotic asphyxiation. Whatever it is, though, I get the feeling it’s very popular with people who think Rey Mysterio is real, and needs our help to defeat The Undertaker.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 02/09/10 at 09:52 AM • Permalink

Categories: ImagesPoliticsNuttersSarah Palin

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My, that’s quite a website over there at Iowa Presidential Watch.  I don’t think they liked the late Rep. Murtha very well.  And the pic of Palin is just pure bizarre.  I’m guessing Rich Lowry’s got a copy of it though.  We should bling it up with some starbursts and the like (and by “we” I don’t mean me. ;-) )

Glad you visited the site, since I didn’t want to link. The artist on this piece (who’s featured there) has a noble history of supporting frauds like the Swift Boat Fabricators. She also runs the site http://www.bootmurtha.com, which has outlived the object of its hatred.

Jesus H. Fuck.

Oh, well.  We’re just reacting with jealousy to their sheer awesomeness.  Or so I’m told.

Also: “grandmother”.

In all seriousness, could she pull off a Presidential bid? Those of us who read political blogs are diehards and we see and hear about her all of the time. I don’t even watch national news anymore, so I don’t know what the general public thinks of her. If they only are getting the positive news about her, the sparkly, All-American Mom for Peace and No More Taxes, will they buy it?

I work in an area with mostly older, white, Republican women and they all think she’s the greatest thing since sliced bread. She’s like the spirit of Ronald Reagan in a beauty queen body. They think she’s one of them, and they would vote for her in a heartbeat.

So, it this just a minority? Do people really think she would be a good President? I’m saying that she would make a good showing. She seems bulletproof.

It’s official: Sarah Palin will be the 45th President of the United States…unless she runs against a pair of Yosemite Sam mudflaps or a “Big Mouth Billy Bass” that sings the theme from Convoy.

This is a brilliant sentence—except I think you’re being sarcastic, and I’m afraid it’s literally true.

And yes, IPW is run by Murtha haters—check out this classy obituary.

Comment by Steve M. on 02/09/10 at 12:05 PM

That picture is so kitsch, you can’t help but admire it in some kind of twisted way…

Do people really think she would be a good President?

I do work with a lot of pretty well educated Republicans and most of them think she’s a joke and a distraction.  However I don’t know that they’re what drives the electorate these days.

Given the exponentially growing number of stupid white people in this country, it’s scary to think that Palin may actually have a shot.

Perhaps the “Laugh, Latte Liberals! Your contempt only strengthens her!” meme is right, but she keeps providing such A+ material.

I don’t know how much of the American public identified with her trying to cheat her way through that already rigged Q & A, but I’m guessing plenty.

Sinclair Lewis and Philip Wylie would laugh their heads off. Then consider a mutual suicide pact.

@donnah—American history is rife with frustrated, suicidal political movements that would rather destroy the Founders’ intellectual elitist vision of a raucous, egalitarian, pragmatic society of bold initiatives and limitless achievement…than have it fall into the hands of raucous, egalitarian, pragmatic people who might upset the status quo and disproportionately reward rarefied levels of achievement that make lazy, ignorant people feel uneasy and irrelevant.

I could be wrong, but I’m hoping that—like Fred Thompson—a Sarah presidency will be a realistic possibly in our angry, dumbed-down American Idol society right up until the moment she announces her intention to run…and normal people shift their viewing frame from “harmless distraction” to “dangerous asshole loose-cannon I wouldn’t hire to baby-sit my pet hamster.” 

Americans may not like their government right now, but I don’t know anyone who thinks turning it over to an embarrassing, babbling hick is the prudent response. Then again, I don’t know anyone who thought Hee-Haw was funny in the intended sense. ;->

That pretty much sums up my hopes.  Then my subconscious whispers ‘Dubya’.  And then my reasonable mind replies, “Ahh, but Bush was an establishment member who cynically used the favor of the Great Unwashed to cement his own political power, not a relative outsider making herself into their lame version of Jeanne d’Arc.  She’ll crash and burn.”  And then my subconscious starts chuckling…

Isn’t that a picture of Tina Fey-as-Palin?

@John Ball—Even though George Bush wasn’t a raw, quivering nerve of hare-brained bullshit hate-mongering like Palin, I can’t rule out her election by the same uncritical base.

However, I can think of less funny things than watching her try to govern for four years.

I, for one, welcome our new Chinese and Mexican masters, and the Rule of the Expat Harvard Grads.

the Rule of the Expat Harvard Grads.

I’m going wherever they are.

And after the past few years, I can no longer predict what the voting public will do or how they will react.

Wait ... that cartoon is being posted by her admirers?  They think it’s flattering to her? 

Truly these people live in a different reality.

They think it’s flattering to her?

I love the crotch-angle shot.  So professional.

Yeppers, MaryRC. In THEIR reality, that’s what a world leader looks like—the joke page of Swank magazine.

Even though George Bush wasn’t a raw, quivering nerve of hare-brained bullshit hate-mongering like Palin, I can’t rule out her election by the same uncritical base.

Exactly.  She probably won’t get it.  But she might.  America has fucked up in a grand way before.

However, I can think of less funny things than watching her try to govern for four years.

Oh, I’ve no doubt it would have it’s amusing moments—but we’re talking about a disaster in the best case scenario, the annihilation of humanity in the worst.  Now is not the time for stupid-crazy to rear its ugly head.

I don’t care for Palin but that picture is just plain mean. Wait, that was created by a fan?

No way.

We’re just reacting with jealousy to their sheer awesomeness.

Yes, that’s it [nudge, nudge]. Liberals, Democrats and other elitist boogey men are jealous. And SCARED TO DEATH of Palin. [wink, wink] Why, if she were to be nominated for president we’d all be too jealous and scared to vote.

Honest.

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