Bill Kristol thinks Chris Christie is the Antichrist

Well, not really. He’s just wrong as usual, this time combining his uniquely wrong insights about both politics and poetry to accidentally imply that New Jersey’s portly guv is The Beast.

Kristol, who as you may recall was instrumental in foisting kooky bumpkin Sarah Palin on an unsuspecting world, looked upon the current GOP field on display during this week’s debate and was appalled by its kookery and mediocrity. In an editorial entitled “Yikes,” Kristol wrote:

Reading the reactions of thoughtful commentators after the stage emptied, talking with conservative policy types and GOP political operatives later last evening and this morning, we know we’re not alone. Most won’t express publicly just how horrified—or at least how demoralized—they are.

[snip]

The e-mails flooding into our inbox during the evening were less guarded. Early on, we received this missive from a bright young conservative: “I’m watching my first GOP debate…and WE SOUND LIKE CRAZY PEOPLE!!!!” As the evening went on, the craziness receded, and the demoralized comments we received stressed the mediocrity of the field rather than its wackiness.

Not admiring your stitch-work, eh Dr. Frankenstein? My heart. It bleeds for you. Not.

Kristol goes on:

Watching this week as Mitch Daniels intelligently promoted his book and Paul Ryan cogently explained why crony capitalism is inconsistent with the rule of law, we of course lamented that neither of them had stepped up to the challenge. Jeb Bush apparently isn’t getting in. That would seem to leave Chris Christie.

He is, in every sense, a big man for a big job.

Notice how Kristol believes the denials of all the candidates he names. Except Christie, whose denials he doesn’t believe. Just as he once cast his beady eyes upon Snowflake Snooki as the savior of the party against all sense and reason, Kristol now settles on the loud-mouthed bully from Jersey as his man. Then the column takes an even odder turn:

A third e-mailer Thursday evening, watching the debate, was reminded of Yeats’s “The Second Coming:”

The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.
There’s some truth to that. But I can’t help wondering if, in the same poem, Yeats didn’t suggest the remedy:

And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?

Sounds like Chris Christie.

Yeats wasn’t exactly suggesting a happy development in those lines. But maybe Kristol is onto something here. For a rabble that cheers executions, eschews compassion for the sick and jeers at diversity (even when it wears the uniform of its country), perhaps The Beast is just the ticket for The Ticket. Or not.

Perhaps somewhere, deep in Flyover Country, one B.L.Z. Bubba awaits his moment…

Posted by Betty Cracker on 09/24/11 at 10:00 AM • Permalink

Categories: I Don't Know Much About Art, But I Know What I Like • Politics • Election '12 • BushCo • Bedwetters • Nutters • Sarah Palin • Teabaggery • Polisnark • Our Stupid Media • Relijun •

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awaits his moment…

Some coarse cross of Chris Christie and Kristol, conceivably? Kee-rist!

Comment by Jewish Steel on 09/24/11 at 10:11 AM

I’m calling bullshit based on the first sentence.

Reading the reactions of thoughtful commentators after the stage emptied

There are no thoughtful commenters in the conservative movement, or they wouldn’t be conservatives.

QED.

Comment by arguingwithsignposts on 09/24/11 at 10:35 AM

Kristol is finally expressing the messianic desperation of the Establishment GOPers. They don’t have an electable prospect in the debates, and their “wild cards” are even worse. Christie’s already been tagged as a Northeast RINO who coddles Muslims, and Palin is a cartoon who’d drag the the primary rhetoric so far down that Romney would have to come out for repealing the Magna Carta and executing traffic offenders, just to dodge the “moderate” label.

Comment by StrangeAppar8us on 09/24/11 at 10:42 AM

You’re dead right, Strange. The GOPers whose exposure to Christie is limited to clips of him yelling at teachers like the cut of his jib, but they haven’t heard the heresies.

Perry has a heresy problem of his own, plus he’s coming off as dumber than a bag of hammers during the debates. Not that dumb is disqualifying for that primary, but you have to at least know when to play the Jeebus card.

Romney might yet grab that nomination, in which case, maybe Palin will form the Cow Moose Party and mount an independent bid, perhaps with Donald Trump on the ticket.

Comment by Betty Cracker on 09/24/11 at 11:00 AM

@arguingwithsignposts — I can’t imagine the kind of human being who could watch the Orlando debate and NOT think they’d stumbled onto the premier of the new Fox series, “America’s Got Hate.”

OK, maybe I can. But that was the sort of crazy that would frighten even Pat Buchanan.

Comment by StrangeAppar8us on 09/24/11 at 11:00 AM

I can’t imagine the kind of human being who could watch the Orlando debate and NOT think they’d stumbled onto the premier of the new Fox series, “America’s Got Hate.”

Someone posted a RedState link to Erick son of Ericksonoferickson positing perry has a problem. In the comments, several people said they were liking Newt Fucking Gingrich more and more. i shit you not.

Comment by arguingwithsignposts on 09/24/11 at 11:05 AM

i shit you not.

I know. Brad Jackson got creamed over there for suggesting Perry was right about in-school tuition for the children of illegals who meet residency requirements and are on a path to citizenship.

The Tea Party gave Pigfuck Americans a “legitimate” platorm from which to express the formerly ineffable bigotry of the tribe. And, now, playing “Can You Top This? with extreme position statements has become the Astro-Glide in a naked pile-on of flaccid erections and premature ejaculations over the corpse of Bill Buckley.

Comment by StrangeAppar8us on 09/24/11 at 11:18 AM

And, now, playing “Can You Top This? with extreme position statements has become the Astro-Glide in a naked pile-on of flaccid erections and premature ejaculations over the corpse of Bill Buckley.

Gack, thanks for that mental image on a bright saturday morning. Now, to the brain bleach.

Comment by arguingwithsignposts on 09/24/11 at 11:22 AM

For a bunch of pro-lifers, the GOP establishment sure seems eager to embrace post-partum abortions for the candidates their cynical posturing begat.

Comment by Oblomova on 09/24/11 at 11:35 AM

Plus, can I just say what I’ve been saying for months now? There are no conservatives on the right. There are only Republicans.

I’d love to smuggle myself in the gallery at one of these “debates,” and loudly yell stuff like “Let him die!” and “Kill him!” whenever any of the candidates says…well, anything, really.

Comment by Mr.Wonderful on 09/24/11 at 11:59 AM

I’d love to smuggle myself in the gallery at one of these “debates,”

Aha! Liberal infiltrators! I KNEW IT!

(srsly, you don’t need to go to the trouble. There’s more than enough howling bloodthirst over there already.)

Comment by Xecky Gilchrist on 09/24/11 at 12:14 PM

Heh - the GOP elevates a know-nothing screeching harpy in Palin which gives other screeching dumbasses illusions of grandeur and Kristol and the rest are appalled?

Sorry, Billy, it is your own damned fault and I hope you choke on it.

Comment by elisabeth on 09/24/11 at 12:55 PM

As an aside, on a shallower note the contrast between Obama and Christie during a debate would be ... huge.

Comment by elisabeth on 09/24/11 at 12:57 PM

Kristol helped build this thing, and now he doesn’t care for the results? Too bad, so sad. Sucks to be you Billy, in an infinite number of ways!

So the next “It” girl is going to be Gingrich, eh? Judging by recent history with the prior “It” girls, he’ll be the savior of the party for about 2 - 3 weeks, and then an insufferable RINO immediately thereafter. Next!

Comment by StringOnAStick on 09/24/11 at 01:08 PM

Is there any candidate who’s pure enough for them? Maybe only Future President-for-Life Limbaugh…

Comment by Scott on 09/24/11 at 02:35 PM

Ohnew series title

Hate plus 8.

Aimai

Comment by Aimai on 09/24/11 at 04:43 PM

Awwwwwww, does poor widdle Billy have a sad ‘coz the monster he created is turning on him? Good. For unleashing Palin on us, he deserves at least this moment of discomfit at the sad shambles of his political party.