I keep trying to pay attention to what Boehner’s saying, but I can’t get over his facial expression. Does he talk with a Mr. Bean voice?

the President will have to explain why he thinks now is the appropriate time to stir up a controversial issue that sharply divides the nation

Stop lying Orangina. You know damn well if he does you’ll have to eat two bags of strychnine powdered dicks.

And his concern about controversial issues that sharply divide the nation is brought to you by the H8rs Recycling Program. “Oh no, we can’t allow those people to [vote/marry/attend school/own property] NOW! Why, the nation is still sharply divided on the issue!

Millions of dads are abandoning their families because . . . GAY MARRIAGE! 

Huckabee, naturally, is too deluded and hypocritical to make the obvious connection that heterosexual marriage is what turns men gay.

But GayMarriage does create jobs!  Just think of all the florists, caterers, restaurants, honeymoon venues etc. that welcome the income when it’s legalized in their states.

But GayMarriage does create jobs!

AT LAST THE TRUTH IS OUT!

The destructive effect of Equal Marriage Rights is SO POWERFUL, it sent shockwaves back in time and forced parents to neglect their kids even when being gay was still regarded as a crime and/or a mental illness!

The good news is, when the “reasonable” bigots start making these post hoc ergo what the fuck arguments they know they’re completely boned. (And not in a good way.)

The bad news is, it makes the unreasonable bigots act up even crankier.

Time to get a stick. With a nail in it.

Heterosexual marriage is a gateway marriage.

casey for the mofo win!

“There is a quantified impact of broken families,” Huckabee said. “[There is a] $300 billion dad deficit in America every year…that’s the amount of money that we spend as taxpayers to pick up the pieces because dads are derelict in their duties.”

Links to studies and graphs or it didn’t happen.

Seriously, #300 BILLION? Fuuuuuck me…

$, you know what I meant.

Also, I heard Republicans (and Mike Huckabee, specifically) created a $100 Billion deficit because of their complete shit-ass ways.

Seriously, #300 BILLION? Fuuuuuck me…

Yeah, I need to contact a family friend who actually knows about this subject. I know the amount of arrearges [sic?] is high, but I seriously doubt it is over a billion. 

But to be honest, it’s nice to see a TalEvangical making up huge lies about straight men for a change.

Even if deadbeat dads owe $300 trillion in back child support, what the hell does that have to do with gay marriage? Are all these formerly straight family men flocking to Hawaii to marry each other?

Oh Betty, you’re not supposed to THINK about the words falling out of that pHucker’s face hole. You’re supposed to hear gay people are a danger to children and the economy and beg Mike to run for president.

Hmm. Looks like he’s been touting the $300 billion figure for a while (From Nov 2010 speech congratulating Iowa on getting rid of its activist judges):

Huckabee also said many of America’s economic problems can be tied to problems with the family. In what he called “the dad deficit,” Huckabee said roughly $300 billion is spent by the federal government each year to prop up single-parent households whose fathers walked out. He also asserted that many of the personal traits which led to the failure of the banking industry and to the economic downturn are taught at the family level.

Looks like gay people caused the banks to fail as well!

Even if our entire welfare safety net was determined to be the fault of deadbeat dads there is nothing to stop the government from garnishing their wages and paying for the kids. In fact, that’s what plenty of state governments do. Also, too, we have laws to enable children to sue their fathers for lack of support.  What has this got to do with gay marriage?

But what I really wanted to say is that I believe that these broken marriage and abandoned children are actually a part of the homosexual agenda—gay men and women are just waiting in the wings to adopt these dropped children.  So, its really all a form of redistributive justice. Therefore, I think we can conclude, Huckabee is against gay marriage because its a form of family socialism!  QED

aimai

Looks like gay people caused the banks to fail as well!

Well, along with teh blacks who created the huge housing bubble.

Well, along with teh blacks who created the huge housing bubble.

Mostly everyone except guys just like Mike. Mostly.