Crappy Owner. Crappy Pizza. Papa John’s.

Are all pizza magnates rightwing assholes? Herman Cain (Godfather’s), Tom Monaghan (Domino’s) and now John Schnatter (Papa John’s)—all currently or formerly mass-produce shitty pizza and all are active in wingnut politics.

It’s almost as if defiling a wondrous culinary gift for profit erodes the brain’s empathy receptors or something. Schnatter, a big Romney bundler, is threatening to hike the price on his crappy pies if forced to comply with “Obamacare:”

On a conference call last week, CEO and founder John Schnatter (a Mitt Romney supporter and fundraiser) said the health care law’s changes — set to go into effect in 2014 — will result in higher costs for the company — which they vowed to pass onto consumers.

“Our best estimate is that the Obamacare will cost 11 to 14 cents per pizza, or 15 to 20 cents per order from a corporate basis,” Schnatter said…

“If Obamacare is in fact not repealed, we will find tactics to shallow out any Obamacare costs and core strategies to pass that cost onto consumers in order to protect our shareholders best interests,” Schnatter vowed.

Two things: If I were ever desperate enough to order one of Schnatter’s lousy pizza facsimiles, I’d be glad to pay an extra $0.20 if that meant the kid who delivered it and the folks who made it had access to basic healthcare. My guess is that most people who aren’t greedy, self-important pricks would be willing to pony up two additional dimes as well.

Secondly, note Schnatter’s vow to hike the price consumers pay for his crappy pizza so shareholders won’t be inconvenienced by any obligations to their underpaid workforce. I hope that blows up in his face like an expired can of anchovies. These people are both clueless and shameless.

[X-posted at Balloon Juice]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 08/08/12 at 07:25 AM • Permalink

Categories: PoliticsElection '12MittensHealth CareNuttersTeabaggery

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I sent them a comment on their feedback forum basically calling them chintzy bastards and if all it took was an extra .20 out of my pocket to make sure someone would have insurance benefits, so be it.  I love how these big guys in the corporate world come out whining when something doesn’t go their way.  These are corporate titans? I’m sure that asshole has health insurance.

Plus, who the fuck says “shallow out”?  Is this a new piece of corporate I’m-smart speak?  “Let’s shallow out the costs and core strategies while we hollow out the middle class.”

$.20 per pizza for healthcare?  Damn, that’s a great deal for everyone! 

Seriously, if all it costs is less than 5% of the total price of goods so that all of us can be free of the fear of medically-induced bankruptcy, we’d be a nation of morons to not jump at the chance*. 

 


* Yes, I know; at least 28% of us are morons, so no go.

It’s almost as if defiling a wondrous culinary gift for profit erodes the brain’s empathy receptors or something.

I think you’re close here, Betty, but have it backwards.

Show me a man who can look at this or this and say, “ya know, if I just replaced the sauce with ketchup, the dough with cardboard, the cheese with cheez, and the chef who cares about good food with a bored college student, I could make a killing in this racket!”, and I’ll show you a man who already has several rotted faculties, but will make a great GOP bundler some day.

Bonus: got to namecheck two of my local faves.  RVA represent!

Comment by Lowkey on 08/08/12 at 02:35 PM

Show me a man who can look at this…

Oooooo Margherita. There’s a newish joint in my town (Salt Lake City) that does a fine one of those.

I haven’t eaten delivery pizza in forever. Having a great time learning to make my own, and the best topping of all is that I’m not supporting these yutzes.

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