Crash of the Living Poll

If fast zombies win, students will take to the streets in protest, wingnuts will somehow find a way to insert themselves into the narrative, and they’ll become even more insufferable with their Twitter triumphalism or whatever it is they’ve been on about lately.

That. Can’t. Happen.

Fast zombies, sheesh. We already had those, they’re called vampires.

Update: Oh, sure, DotD was great, but can you imagine how much better it would’ve been with more wind-sprints? Oh that’s right you don’t have to imagine it.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Rumproast and its focus on actual horror.

Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on 06/18/09 at 09:55 PM • Permalink

Categories: Movies •

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From the “actual horror” files:

“I already emailed Olive Garden and told them until I had a definite answer and they were pulling their advertising I would not be eating in their restaurants and instead I would be eating a lot of Hellmann’s mayonaise.”

You go, girl.

Comment by Matt on 06/19/09 at 11:33 AM

Always happy to do my part for slow zombies. What is the world coming to, when even our zombies are under deadli—

Sorry.

But fast zombies are just not right. There’s no metaphorical value in a fast zombie. “Faster than a speeding zombie”?

On the other hand, “Faster than a feeding zombie”...

It could work. We could make it work, if push comes to shove. Which, hey, we are talking zombies, after all.

Comment by Mrs. Polly on 06/19/09 at 11:41 AM

@ Matt, that one kind of leaps out at you, doesn’t it? Maybe she’s…Puma for Afterlife!!!!

Comment by Mrs. Polly on 06/19/09 at 11:44 AM

You would have to know that Puma for Life made that comment. After which, my comment is screamingly funny. Or might have been, perhaps. In a smile-to-yourself kind of way. If you’ve a low threshold for smiling-to-yourself.

Anyway.

Fast zombies! Just another symptom of what’s wrong with our speeded-up culture. Them, and global warming.