I know, I know ... I should let it go, but I still find these PUMA goofballs endlessly entertaining. Someone sent me an email yesterday (I have “sources”!) tipping me off to the fact that the PUMAs were claiming they had raised six million dollars in their July 4th drive to retire Hillary’s debt (they were encouraging people to donate $20.08 on that day). Sure enough, head PUMA Will Bower amped up that claim yesterday at the beginning of their Blog Talk Radio show called “No We Won’t” (you’ve gotta hear the intro):
We PUMAs have generated a lot of income to help pay down Hillary’s debt. We have it on good authority that our push, our July 4th push, generated from as little as six million and up to ten million dollars to pay off her debt.
As a prominent online journalist emailed me earlier, “So totally implausible...” I’m guessing the “good authority” was probably Cristi “Fatloss Forever” Adkins.
Bower will be on (you guessed it) Neil Cavuto’s Your World today at 4 making the same ludicrous claim, so we’ll update this post with the video as soon as it becomes available.
PUMA: The rift that keeps on giving.
SOMEWHAT RELATED: I think Neil Cavuto should have this guy on next. Sweet fucking jeebus, I’ve finally found the batshit craziest PUMA. No one can top this guy. My journey is complete. I also discovered the worst.parade.float.ever.
UPDATE: Your World actually billed Bower’s announcement as an “exclusive” and ran this blurb at the bottom of the screen during the interview:
I’m glad somebody else appreciates this phenomena too. They are planning “secret puma actions” that only verified pumas get by email from their leader. Part of me believes it is just great satire, and I’m being had like a guest on Colbert.
I can’t help it, I just want to know more.
Comment by Pete on 07/10/08 at 02:38 PM
Heck, maybe it’s true—non-elitist Lady Lynn Forester de la Rothschild could probably scrape up $6 mill by ordering her battalion of maids to gather all the spare change from the bottoms of the 8,987 designer purses stored in her 54-acre closet.
I still think these PUMAS are just Republicans acting like dittoheads.
Then again, if they raised 10 mill, isn’t that enough to pay off Mama’s debt?
Oh, and here’s a quote from my buddy Eyez’s book that had me choking on my quesadilla at lunch.
I didn’t want or choose to be Jewish, it was something my parents insisted on genetically. Well, in truth, they weren’t very religious. In fact, we were so reformed my foreskin tried to grow back.
He’s a former Brooklyn boy, a Canarsie kid and one of the funniest men I have ever known.
Comment by HumboldtBlue on 07/10/08 at 05:45 PM
Why then, is the Clinton campaign still hitting me up for money?
And why are the Clintonistas being so pissy because the people they trashed throughout the primaries are not raising money fast enough to suit them?
Shouldn’t $10 mil wipe the debts out?
Comment by Helena Montana on 07/10/08 at 06:04 PM
4 minutes of Perry Logan = years of emotional trauma. You’re getting the bill for my therapist and recreational drugs, Kevin.
Off topic: your ‘currently listening’ list is awesome.
Rub a 6 pound boneless rump roast with 2 teaspoons salt, 1 teaspoon dry mustard and 1/4 teaspoon each of garlic salt and pepper. If you wish, use unseasoned meat tenderizer according to directions on the package.
Comment by Roza on 07/11/08 at 04:57 PM
You know it’s well within reason to believe the money is there, because if you take 20.08 and multiply that by 2.5 million, you only need 25% of 2.5 million to equal 10 million (+)..... So don’t be to sure of your selves about the realm of possibilities ..... Exercise your American rights and just think of the possibilities....
Comment by Jackie on 07/12/08 at 02:52 AM
You know it’s well within reason to believe the money is there, because if you take 20.08 and multiply that by 2.5 million, you only need 25% of 2.5 million to equal 10 million (+)..... So don’t be to sure of your selves about the realm of possibilities ..... Exercise your American rights and just think of the possibilities....
At which point does the tab of acid come in? And, for the love of god, if there’s that much money floating around in Pumaland, would somebody please buy Bower a new tie?
