Finally, a Bail-Out Conservatives Can Get Behind

Wall Street and Union automakers? Waste of money. Let ‘em die. That’s the Free Market at work, bro’.

But a British-owned oil company? Fuck, man—that’s thousands of jobs, much-needed economic activity, a shitload of Pension Fund investments and America’s Energy Security you’re screwin’ with.

I’ve seen inklings of this “Don’t Let Obama Kill BP” meme popping up in conservative forum comments over the last few days. But as BP’s market cap and stock price continue to tank, it’s a sentiment that seems to be going mainstream. And now that Boehner’s found a neat rhetorical trick to link the Federal government (not the one, I guess, he’s part of) and BP in a diabolical Yin-Yang of culpability, we can expect to see the more daring Wingnut pundits shimmy across the tightrope of arguing that BP Must Be Saved With Taxpayer Money, But We Wouldn’t Have to Do It If Obama—Who Opposes a Bail-Out—Had Responded More Decisively to the Deepwater Spill.

That’s a tad clunky, though. So, at the risk of aiding and abetting the enemy, I’ll jump ahead to the Ultimate Roveian Message Distillation: “Obama is forcing us to abandon bedrock Conservative principles in order to save America.” In fact, I’m actually happy to offer it up, since it worked so well the last time. 

Next up: Rand Paul defends our “Special Relationship” with Britain, and Sarah Palin tweets a message of solidarity with the nation that founded the Original 13 Colonies, and introduced the Native Americans to tea.

UPDATE: OK, looks like Boehner has hauled his earlier statement back into the laboratory for recalibration (but the day is young):

Oceania has always been at war with Eastasia. [H/T to Kevin K. and Allan for the alerts in comments]

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/10/10 at 02:33 PM • Permalink

And Beck is channeling Kipling while his ratings do crash and do burn.

From that Breitbart article:

“I’ve abandoned free-market principles to save the free-market system,” Bush told CNN television

It’s the old fucking for virginity schtick.

Boehner is tweeting himself out of trouble.

According to Josh Marshall, he’s lying.

Pay vewy vewy close attention to when Republicans talk about who’s paying for “cleaning up the spill.”  Ask them, “Does that include damages to everyone who was impacted by the spill?”  Sit back and watch them spin.

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