It’s the Unfairness, Stupid! (Part 77,731)

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Did you watch the Piers Morgan interview with Willard and Ann(toinette) Romney that Anne Laurie linked? OMFG!

Here’s a deal for you, British cousins: We won’t make any trouble when the Little Lord Fauntleromneys* try to return to America if you’ll keep that insufferable prat Morgan within your borders. An example of the hard-hitting journalism:

MORGAN: On the economy, clearly Barack Obama has decided your weakness, your vulnerability, is your record at Bain Capital. And it’s a very divisive issue. And quite a fascinating issue because when I look at some of these attack ads, it’s almost like he’s attacking you for being successful and rich which is not a traditional area of battleground to an American from an American because America was founded on working hard, achievement, success, and making money.

That’s Kristol-level wrongness there, in which falsehoods are nested within falsehoods like a Matryoshka doll. But I thought the most fascinating segment was when Morgan questioned Romney about the upcoming dressage competition. Romney was all, “Rafalca who?”

Look, I’m sure Rafalca is a perfectly lovely animal—one I’d like to have a beer with!—and it’s not her fault that she’s the plaything of useless rich people. The issue is that the Rafalca-owner class has rigged the tax code to such an extent that I can’t write off my child’s braces, whereas Rafalca’s owners can write off more than my entire annual wages for a nonexistent dancing horse “business.” But that’s not enough; they want MORE.

Clueless, entitled prick that he is, Romney dimly perceives that this looks kinda bad, so he’s hoping no one watches the dressage competition and that his wife’s horse fails to medal so the issue will go away. Me, I hope Rafalca takes the gold, and I’ve circled August 2 on my calendar.

*Spelling correction H/T to NotMax. Also too, apparently it was Earl Fauntleroy (rather than Little Lord) who was the entitled douchenozzle—H/T, Aimai.

[X-posted at Balloon Juice]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 07/28/12 at 09:46 AM • Permalink

Categories: CrittersPoliticsElection '12MittensOur Stupid Media

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Piers Stefan Pughe-Morgan (predictably dubbed Piers Moron by our satirical mag Private Eye) began his newspaper career as a gossip columnist on the Sun, moved on to edit the shamed and now-defunct News of the World, then moved on to edit the at times vaguely left-of-center tabloid Daily Mirror.

His newspaper career was dogged by accusations of lack of concern for privacy (he’s never been officially nailed on any phone hacking to date, though that’s more a matter of luck than anything else), and in one case what looked suspiciously like insider trading. For a brief period during the Iraq War he noticed the meaningless trivial drivel he was constantly publishing and took the Mirror on an anti-war tack, finally coming a cropper when he published faked photos of Iraqi prisoners supposedly being abused by British soldiers and was forced to resign.

His Wikipedia page’s section on “Feuds” is quite a hoot.

Basically, he’s doing all he can to suck up to those he perceives as powerful in the US and carve out a niche as a stock British contrarian (he’s been a pretty lonely voice defending Romney about his conduct in London) because he’s made such an arse of himself in the UK that we just reflexively laugh at anything he says.

Oh, and if you want to abuse Piers Morgan on Twitter, go ahead, but there’s a very long queue. A few samples:

Piers Morgan ‏@piersmorgan
Right, let’s go Britain - show the world (and Mitt Romney) what we’re really made of… #London2012

19h Mazen Madani Mazen Madani ‏@mimadani
@piersmorgan I don’t think Mitt Romney can see beyond the US border.

19h PETER MARTIN PETER MARTIN ‏@RedpeterJFT96
@piersmorgan your made of toffee you bad gimp

Piers Morgan ‏@piersmorgan
I am so unspeakably proud to be British right now.

Mariano I. Baragiola ‏@mbaragiola
@piersmorgan and yet you live in New York?

15h Dominic Gray Dominic Gray ‏@DommieWobble
@piersmorgan were you as proud to be british when you used to enjoy printing stories that destroyed careers & lives?

16h PM_UK1 PM_UK1 ‏@PM_UK1
@piersmorgan is that why you live and work in the states???? #olympicceremony

15h Harley Ilott Harley Ilott ‏@harleyilott
@piersmorgan fuck off and stay in America

Piers Morgan ‏@piersmorgan
I still don’t quite understand why the hell we have to hear everything in FRENCH first? Utterly ridiculous. #olympicceremony

17h David Wootton David Wootton ‏@BeekeeperGuide
@piersmorgan @AJROSCO you twat Morgan. French has always been official language of Olympics. a Frenchman was the founder of modern Olympics.

17h Paul Paul ‏@Pvul_QtrCntQnz
@piersmorgan don’t you know Coubertin dude ? come on pay some respect to history

17h Javier Álvarez Javier Álvarez ‏@javier_alvarez
@piersmorgan French is the official language of the Olympic Movement.

18h Geoffrey Smith Geoffrey Smith ‏@GSmithOfficial
@piersmorgan French is the official Olympic language… you’re meant to be a clever man piers… #actuallyamoron

Brook Langston ‏@BrookLangston
@piersmorgan is it true they will use the Stadium after the Olympics for storage of your ego?

Charlie Jackson ‏@Charlie_OoRITE
Personally I’d rather see @piersmorgan strapped to a pole in the middle and repeatedly kicked in the balls. #olympicceremony

LMAO, Brit! No mercy!

Jayne Bradley ‏@swallowsbird
@piersmorgan Go #TeamUSA ! (sorry, Brits, have to say that….) GO FUCK YOURSELF AND THEN FUCK OFF TO FUCKSVILLE

Sometimes I’m so very, very proud to be British. :O)

Here’s a deal for you, British cousins: We won’t make any trouble when the Little Lord Fauntleromneys* try to return to America if you’ll keep that insufferable prat Morgan within your borders.

You sure? I think we might get the better of the deal if we keep Piers, even if he is a gigantic tool. As far as I know, he’s never stolen anyone’s pension.

Well, the US isn’t exactly a Dressage juggernaut.  At least not when it comes to gold.  We’re decent at scoring silver and bronze though.

I’m torn.  As a former dressage rider, (Prix St. Georges level, which is the lower end of international FEI levels)  I’d like to see the US team do well.  As someone who fucking HATES the Romney family though…...

*grumble*

Oh and the reason why I don’t ride dressage anymore?

To compete in anything other than local or regional, you either have to be a) insanely wealthy, b) related to someone insanely wealthy, or c) be sleeping with someone insanely wealthy.    I’m neither a or b, and refuse to whore myself for c.

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