Jesus don’t want you for a sunbeam

The personal assistant to Jesus Christ over at the National Review Online, K-Lo, thought a reader’s observation that God seemed to be smiling down on Bachmann’s teabagger rally (Holocaust imagery and all) was worth passing along:

However, K-Lo would appreciate it very much if perverts like the president and lefty bloggers would refrain from using language that causes images related to S-E-X to invade her cranium unbidden:

So to review, Holocaust imagery accompanied by idiotic braying about freedom fighters and socialism makes Jesus happy. However, calling people who glue teabags to their hats “teabaggers” and linking an unfortunate consequence of back-alley abortions to an anti-choice congressman’s name makes Jesus sad. Please keep this in mind going forward lest the Lord rain down His judgment upon you.

Posted by Betty Cracker on 11/08/09 at 09:34 AM • Permalink

Categories: News • Politics • Bedwetters • Nutters •

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“Does anybody think that the teabag, anti-government people are going to support them if they bring down health care?”

Maybe he should have called them the “hard-working, white voters.”

It’s a silly question of course, how can the teabaggers support anybody and cling to their guns at the same time?

Comment by AltHippo on 11/08/09 at 10:46 AM

i wonder what it would look like to see michele bachman actually get teabagged

oh never mind

Comment by distributorcap on 11/08/09 at 11:32 AM

Great job, Betty! Especially the headline.

Comment by Oblomova on 11/08/09 at 11:46 AM

Did anyone notice that Tom Price (R-GA) seems to have depilated his facial hair?

Comment by sunkawakan on 11/08/09 at 11:49 AM

“Especially the headline.”

Vaselines reference?

Comment by JasonM on 11/08/09 at 02:25 PM

Oh, Betty, I remember that Sunday School song! I hadn’t thought of that for about forty years.

“Jesus wants me for a sunbeam, a sunbeam, a sunbeam…

Jesus wants me for a sunbeam to shine for him each day”

Comment by donnah on 11/08/09 at 04:29 PM

That’s no rainbow. Rich Lowry was watching some old Sarah Palin clips on NRO’s executive veranda and bestowed a sacred batch of starbursts unto the gathering teabagggers from a half a mile away.

Comment by Lawnguylander on 11/08/09 at 04:39 PM

I’m sure that rainbow had something to do with gay rights, but I just can’t figure out what it is. Either that or unicorns are loose on the mall. Again.

Comment by Bonnach on 11/08/09 at 04:43 PM

If I was those people, right now I’d be thinking “Gee, thanks for the fucking rainbow, God, but couldn’t you have, you know, kept the bill from being passed?”