LL Cool J: Mama Bear Palin Said Knock You Out

When I first heard that LL Cool J was going to be one of the first guests on Sarah Palin’s new FOX News show Real American Stories (love the headline), I was wondering why he agreed to do it. Well—surprise!he didn’t...

LL Cool J on Twitter about Palin and FOX

EVERYTHING SARAH PALIN DOES IS A BIG FAT LIE!

Here’s the spot:

I can hardly wait for her interviews with Eazy-E and Ol’ Dirty Bastard.

Posted by Kevin K. on 03/31/10 at 09:00 AM • Permalink

Categories: MusicPoliticsNuttersSarah PalinOur Stupid MediaSkull HampersTelevisionYouTubidity

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Is she going to do any live interviews at all? Or will she just show clips from the Fox vault and regurgitate prefabricated talking points about how Americany her “guests” are and how their real American stories are just so darned real? And American?

Betty, you forgot “commonsense conservative.”

Also, I hear Sarah’s duet with Nat King Cole is a barn-burner. Also.

You should see her dance with Fred Astaire - backward, in common sense heels!

Great catch! Personally, I think the idea of including pre-recorded “ringers” to make it look like Sarah is “down with” youth culture and non-whites is brilliant.

I mean, nobody wants to watch eight hours of The Quitter talking to old, white snake-handling evangelicals, freelance immigration Bounty Hunters and Tonya Harding.

You should see her dance with Fred Astaire - backward, in common sense heels!

LOL. I’m pretty sure she was the vacuum.

And they’ve got Jimmi Hendrix coming ‘round for a little Spanish Castle Magic!  It’ll be great!

Supposedly cunning dog whistle about brown people being liars that turns out to be another blast on the train whistle in 5…4…3…

I wouldn’t be surprised if “Sarah Palin’s Alaska” ends up being shot mostly in Canada, since the landscapes are a good match and production costs are a lot lower.

I wouldn’t be surprised if her reality show is shot on the old Three’s Company set.

I wonder what President Snooki thought of these lyrics.

Comment by JasonM on 03/31/10 at 10:44 AM

You read my mind, Kev.

Strange, re: shooting in Canada, the story just gets better.

One of the very few things Sarah Palin actually managed to accomplish during her gnat’s eyelash of a term as Governor was to sign legislation granting huge tax breaks to production companies for shooting in Alaska, which tax breaks also apply to the salaries of on-camera talent.

Or the Palin-Clan-Guaranteed-Employment-Act of 2008, as it will become known.

From the Anchorage Press:

Initial reports last week said Palin’s appearance fee for a soft-documentary TV show featuring Alaska stories could be between $1 million and $1.5 million, per episode. Zoinks!

...It’s not quite as expensive as it sounds. The state of Alaska’s film subsidy program would allow Burnett, or anyone who hires an Alaska resident as a talking head, to get back 40 percent of those wages, or $400,000. Production companies that shoot between October and March qualify for an additional two percent, and there’s a two-percent rural shooting bonus. So if a company pays an Alaska politician—or an Alaska fifth grader—$1 million to travel to Barrow and chatter in front of cameras about the first sunrise of 2011 next January, the production can qualify for $442,000 in state tax credits.  Hedges the bet a just little, eh?

h/t Shannyn Moore

Fox finally reacts with a Palinesque MIAOW, while studiously missing the point:

A Fox News spokesperson responds that they are cutting the LL Cool J interview from the Palin program:

“Real American Stories” features uplifting tales about overcoming adversity and we believe Mr. Smith’s interview fit that criteria.  However, as it appears that Mr. Smith does not want to be associated with a program that could serve as an inspiration to others, we are cutting
his interview from the special and wish him the best with his fledgling acting career.

The cynical might say that any publicity is good publicity, and that remaining draws Toby Keith and Jack Welch aren’t exactly going to set tongues wagging.

Shorter Fox News:

The content should put the lotion on its skin and keep its opinion about how it is displayed to itself.

Ouch.  I hope Mr. Cool J’s career can survive without the Fox News demographic.

Oh wait.

I hear MC Hammer might be available.

It takes a hard-hitting journalist like Palin to get LL to come clean about his inability to live without his radio.

Ummm…. if she’s gonna interview Ez-E that could get ugly really quick considering dude died from aids about a decade ago. Then again, interviewing a corpse is a nice analogy for Palin’s political career.

... remaining draws Toby Keith and Jack Welch aren’t exactly going to set tongues wagging

Ah. My mistake:

Like LL Cool J, Toby Keith is slated to appear on “Real American Stories,” a Fox News show hosted by Sarah Palin. Unlike LL Cool J, Keith is still slated to be on the program, but his inclusion was news to him.

We just talked to Toby Keith’s representative. Keith, who says he’s a registered Democrat, was not told about the usage of a past interview for Palin’s program. “We were never contacted by Fox,” his rep tells Hitfix.“I have no idea what interview it’s taken from.They’re promoting this like it’s a brand new interview. He never sat down with Sarah Palin.”

Now, where’s Welch ...?

Oh, and after re-reading, I’m an idiot, Betty.

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