John from Soberish tagged me a couple of days ago to identify five of my “Embarrassing Guilty Pleasures” and it’s a difficult game for me to play because (I’ll fess up) I’m a bit of a musical prick. I take great pride in knowing about and enjoying the music of way-underground bands like the Departmentstore Santas and Judas Bullethead, not to mention obscure world music, oddball jazz, ancient n’ scratchy “roots” music, Idaho funk only eighteen other people (including the band members) have heard, etc., so I’m prone to getting embarrassed listening to and digging glossy and popular stuff by, say, Fleetwood Mac or Steely Dan. Since I realize those bands are relished and respected in certain musical quarters, I’ll keep them off the list (for the record, I love Tusk and Pretzel Logic, but please don’t tell anyone) and drill down into the deepest and darkest parts of my musical prickitude to lay some 100% certified muck on you. Latest and gentleman, start your indignation!
Helen Reddy—“Delta Dawn”
Okay, the cool factor gets kicked up several (million) notches because Sly Stone introduces Helen in this live clip, but just pretend you didn’t see it. There are two songs I consider my specialties at karaoke bars. This is one of them. I sing it like I’m Michael Gerald of Killdozer. Oh, and the Tanya Tucker version of this song can go fuck itself. Hard.
Chicago—“Feelin’ Stronger Every Day”
I’ll admit it. This isn’t the only Chicago song I love, this is just the most embarrassing one. I feel naked. And ashamed.
Len—“Steal My Sunshine”
I felt like stabbing myself in the head with a fork when I couldn’t get this song out of my head back in ‘99. Several weeks later I decided that, yes, I do want a “million miles of fun.” How could I be so foolish? Who in the hell wouldn’t want a million miles of fun? You know who wouldn’t want that? Assholes. And I’ll never let them steal my sunshine.
The Osmonds—“Crazy Horses”
I came really close to going my entire life without liking a single song by the Osmonds and then eight months agoPale Dave had to go and screw everything up. I mean, this rocks, right? WTF?! This song should have never been allowed to happen. I’m pretty sure its mere existence is responsible for global warming or some other massive calamity.
Maria Muldaur - “Midnight At The Oasis”
You’d be hard pressed to find lyrics to any song that are as bad the ones you’ll find in the steaming pile o’ turd that is “Midnight at the Oasis.” “Cactus is our friend”? “Send your camel to bed”? Are you shitting me? Why am I admitting I dig this song? Instead of basking in its schmaltzy popjazzerisms, I should be hunting down songwriter David Nichtern and dropping him into the middle of a desert without any water, provisions or sunscreen, and leave him with just a gun with one bullet in it. And a copy of the lyrics to this song.
I will now pass this soul-baring chore along to Icebergwedge, Mark at Holly Martin’s Friend, Tom Hilton and Thers. If you’d like to play along, either do so in the comments or let me know if you want me to add your blog to this list.
UPDATE: Okay, I forgot I kind of like “One Bad Apple” by the Osmonds, too. Now excuse me while I go walk in front of an oncoming bus.
That Chicago song was one of the few of theirs I actually liked.
These date from my youth, and can all be found on YouTube:
Climax - Precious And Few Edison Lighthouse - Love Grows Where My Rosemary Goes Christie - Yellow River And of course, Mungo Jerry - In the Summertime (dig the jug, man)
Comment by Tracy on 08/01/08 at 10:43 AM
Man, don’t get me started! I actually have that Osmonds song and suggested it to my buddy for a band we’re trying to put together. Frankly, it rocks - what can I say?
Steely Dan is probably one of my top three favorite bands. If you’re not a Dan fan, take a look at some of the musicians who’ve been part of the SD experience, some time. Wow!
Embarassing, though, eh? I just picked up a 9 CD Dionn Warwick collection. I also have huge collection of 70’s/80’s stuff - the music that percolated through my brain when I was growing up. Anyone need a copy of Robbie Dupree’s “Hot Rod Hearts”? Don Johnson’s “Heartbeat”? Yeah, it’s that bad at my place.
Kevin, you should talk to my buddy Mark, at Mississippifarian. He’s a collector of “out there” stuff, too, and could probably hook you up with a lot of cool stuff in almost any genre.
Tracy, I have a great quasi-Reggae cover of Summer Time by Shaggy and Rayvon.
Comment by Ripley on 08/01/08 at 10:58 AM
Climax, oh man, you hit pay dirt with that one. I can’t ride that wave with you. All of the hair on my arms fell off after listening to the first minute of that.
Also, one of my folders for the music collection is called “Guilty Pleasures.” We’re dorks! Dorks, I tell you!
Comment by Ripley on 08/01/08 at 11:01 AM
Ripley, no I really like Steely Dan, but I know a lot of people (including my wife) who dismiss them as the equivalent of elevator music. I haven’t much cared for their comeback albums. Actually, I’m not big on anything post-Aja, but I really like everything before it.
Take on Me, Aha (still my all-time fave music video, well, ecept for the one where Chris Walken goes around dancing on stuff)
Muskrat Love, Cpt & Ten.
Wake me up, Wham
Comment by HumboldtBlue on 08/01/08 at 11:13 AM
In the college days after a long night of partying and just as the sun came up we’d play Starbuck’s Moonlight Feels Right and sing along with the line “we see the some come up on Sunday morning” ... we’d be launching empty beer bottles off the balcony and into the ravine out back. It’s quite the embarrassment that I recently downloaded that single from iTunes. What was I thinking?
My wife and I decided to splurge and go see him in Vegas when we were out there several years ago and it was one of the best shows I’ve seen in my life. We were both amazed how much we loved it. It was surreal (blue-haired women yelling, “You’re delicious!"), the venue was all sparkly (MGM Grand) and, damn, even in his later years that motherfucker could still belt ‘em out.
we’d be launching empty beer bottles off the balcony and into the ravine out back
That’s better than my college days. My off-campus roommate and the semi-punk-rock alcoholic who lived downstairs used to hurl beer bottles into the apartment complex’s parking lot between cars.
I generally do a fair bit of music blogging, but I haven’t blogged much of anything lately. If you search “Friday Night Drinking Club” at my place, you can see and download my Random iTunes bits, if you’re inclined.
Oh, and search “Sinners” and “Reggae”, if you want some short compilations of trance or reggae. (I haven’t made any of those in quite a while.) I suppose I should just re-post the links to make it easier.
I was going to put up “Ghost in You” by the Psychedelic Furs, but I know they’re held in fairly high regard by some critics. I tend to just dump all new wave into the “trash” category, but I’ve always kinda liked the Furs. Before they did “Pretty in Pink,” which is totally icky-making.
Oh shit, how could I forget Bandstand! by Barry? Sheesh, that and anything from the Rocky movie soundtrack.
And one more. My rock and roll debut, made while in 8th grade with our band, High Voltage was done while I belted out Hold The Line.
I’m no longer a tenor, but I could sing the shit outta that song as a kid.
Comment by HumboldtBlue on 08/01/08 at 01:15 PM
It’s quite simple for me to generate several titles which are ripe for embarrassment. I have many melodies which deposit themselves in my frontal lobe, fortifying themselves like neurological stalactites. They never leave. Some of them have been there for 30 years. I sing them when cycling in noisy traffic.
1. John Denver-"Blow up Your TV” I love the part about eating a lot of peaches and finding Jesus on your on own. What is more American than that? 2. Annie: the Musical- “It’s a Hard-Knock Life.” I was beside myself when Jay-Z sampled from this musical chunk of my adolescence. Is nothing sacred? 3. “Facts of Life” theme song-I am nervous for even mentioning this one. 4. CW McCall: “Convoy” This was one of my first 45 singles. I could lie and say that my first record was something from Chubby Checker or the Beatles, but no, it was the theme song from a movie that glorifies truck driving and stars Ali McGraw and Kris Kristofferson.
Comment by Mark on 08/01/08 at 01:24 PM
Damn, I forgot this one too. This is dedicated to Betty.
How come all of these clips are “no longer available?”
Comment by HumboldtBlue on 08/01/08 at 02:45 PM
Didn’t Springsteen write Blinded By the Light?
Yeah, but in his original version it was ”wrecked up like a douche.” I think that’s NJ slang for peeing yourself when you get too drunk. Manfred Mann thought that was a little too crass so he tweaked it in his version.
Oh, and all of the videos work for me. I played them all at the same time and it was a total mindfuck.
I used to own that “Crazy Horses” album. Loved it!! I thought the Osmonds rawked! Course that was back in ‘72 when I’d wake up early on Sat. morning to watch all the great cartoons like The Osmonds, the Jackson 5, Fat Albert, Josie and the Pussycats, the Brady Kids, the Archies and Scooby Doo. And then there were all those psychadelic Krofft shows… Man, I look at what my kids are watching today and almost cry. Where’s the great music? Where’s the blatant racial stereotyping? (ahem… the Charlie Chan cartoons?)
As for my guilty pleasures, they’re mostly all those great 70s power pop songs. 1. The Knack - My Sharona 2. Sweet - Little Willie 3. Bad Company - Rock ‘n’ Roll Fantasy 4. Men at Work - Who Can It Be Now? (I can listen to that song every day. Kill me now) 5. Anything by Cheap Trick before 1983
Lionel Ritchie- “Dancing On The Ceiling” Billy Ocean- “Caribbean Queen” Dexys Midnight Runners- “Come-on Eileen” Hall and Oates “Out of Touch” Oakridge Boys- “Elvira” Boston- “Something About You”
And any Jheri Curl R&B;Group from the 80’s-90’s
Dear god let me stop now
Comment by Manamongst Hussein on 08/02/08 at 09:33 AM
