Rand Paul Has 99 Problems

From the “damn, he’s trying too hard to be relevant” files, Marco Rubio made references to hip-and/or-hop artists in a response to Rand Paul’s fauxlibuster (remember, Harry Reid’s spinelessness ensured that “talking filibusters” were unnecessary).  Here’s Rubio incongruously trying to sound relevant:


Ah, yes, way to woo the kids with references to Jay-Z… I think Rubio’s trying to steal the “youth” vote that Rand is trying to inherit from his old man by speaking with the vocabulary of the street.  Good luck, Marco, Paul didn’t even take a drink until he was about an hour into his speech… no furtive snatches at baby-sized water bottles for this Randian superman. Keep quoting those hippety hop artists, Marco, it won’t change the fact that Rand Paul drank your milkshake (which is sure to bring all the libertarians to the yard).  Oh sure, the kids will be appalled that Rand Paul would have opposed the Civil Rights Act of 1964, he doesn’t support reproductive freedom for women, and he didn’t seem to mind that his “Tea Tea Macoutes” stomped a young woman in his presence, but he pretty much left you in his dust (which may explain your dry mouth).  Regarding his continued appeal until 2016, Rand Paul has 99 Problems, but Marco Rubio isn’t one of ‘em.


Of course, Rand Paul is right about the use of drones in extrajudicial killings of American citizens, but you know what they say about a stopped clock… as an added benefit, his fauxlibuster is deepening the rifts in the Republican Party.

Cross-posted at my eponymous blog.

Posted by Big Bad Bald Bastard on 03/08/13 at 07:54 AM • Permalink

Categories: PoliticsPolisnark

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as an added benefit, his fauxlibuster is deepening the rifts in the Republican Party.

I have to be 110% behind any effort that hastens the demise of the GOP no matter how idiotic.  Especially upworthy was the spectacle of Ms Lindsey and Captain America giving the young ‘uns “what for” over drone-age.

Not to mention Ms Lindsey flipping her vote on Brennan.  Rand gave her the perfect face-saving out of her Benghazi-or-Bust crusade.

Great post, BBBB!

Yeah, Marco, you keep dropping relevancy name-checks.  If you just sprinkle some nods to Reddit in among your shout-outs to Young Earth Creationism, the kids will come a-runnin’!

LOL, it is so funny how much you suck.  See you in 2016!

Of course, Rand Paul is right about the use of drones in extrajudicial killings of American citizens

He now appears to agree with the administration!

Butbutbutbut, he’s Hispanic and a Republican; he should be covered in magic sauce and win elections just by thinking about them!

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