Reasons the GOP Will Never Get Better: #73

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One of the BIG reasons that Republicans “Will Never Get Better” is their propensity for promoting nitwitty hacks who couldn’t hold their own in a high school debate club to positions of “thought leadership” in which they write “serious books,” post pseudo-intellectual op-eds for national publications and “win” fellowships to right-wing “think” tanks just like real people. 

From those lofty perches, such bird-brains release their prodigious droppings into the idea stream from which the right-wingosphere drinks deeply.  And so it goes . . .

One such avian diletante is Marc Thiessen whose bona fides include: a widely panned, book length apologia for the Bush administration’s propensity for torturing prisoners (Courting Disaster: How the CIA Kept America Safe and How Barack Obama Is Inviting the Next Attack); a visiting “fellowship” at the American Enterprise Institute: and a regular gig hacking for the Washington Post, which appears to be helping Fred Hiatt immensely in his race to the bottom of the newspaper publishing heap.

As demonstrated by the photo above, Thiessen also grabbed the #6 spot on Alex Pareene’s “Hack Thirty” list in 2010.

Still, don’t feel too bad if you’ve never heard of Marc Thiessen—it only means you were smart enough to stay clear of places “momma told you not to come.”

Here’s Marc Thiessen-in-a-nutshell, though, for enquiring minds:

A speechwriter in the Bush White House and Donald Rumsfeld Pentagon, Thiessen has a lengthy track record working for right-wing and hardline nationalist organizations and political figures. He was a policy adviser to Sen. Jesse Helms in the late 1990s; served as an assistant at the William Bennett-led Empower America (now FreedomWorks); and received a fellowship at the Stanford University-based Hoover Institution.

Thiessen got his start in right-wing Washington politics working as a researcher at the now-defunct lobbying firm Black, Manafort, Stone, and Kelly during 1989-1993. The firm, which was closely associated with conservative senators like Helms and Phil Gramm, was notorious for its work on behalf of controversial clients, including Zaire’s Mobuto Sese Seko, the Philippines’ Ferdinand Marcos, and the Angolan rebel group UNITA.  A 1992 article in Spy magazine opined, “The well-compensated flacks at Black Manafort stand at the pinnacle of organizational apologism. Name a corrupt despot, and Black Manafort will name the account.”

And, more recently:

Thiessen’s campaign against the Obama administration has included comparing the Bush administration lawyers who crafted a legal case for using torture with Obama Justice Department appointees who at one time represented terrorist suspects. Thiessen argued that the right to counsel—the very framework of the U.S. legal system—is superfluous and in fact harmful when it comes to terror suspects. He then vigorously defended “Fine lawyers like John Yoo, Jay Bybee, David Addington, Jim Haynes, Steve Bradbury,” who arguably violated both U.S. and international law in providing a legal alibi for torture.

Which brings us to yesterday, in which Thiessen urges the Flying Monkeys of the Right to “Stand and fight” Obama on the fiscal cliff.  (Ever notice how GOP cheerleaders for “fighting everything” are usually chubby, balding little white guys who are torture fans?)

Anyway, Thiessen gets up on his soapbox, yesterday, and schools his “fellow Murkins” thus:

When the 1st Marine Regiment was encircled by communist forces at the Battle of Chosin Reservoir, Marine Col. Lewis “Chesty” Puller was said to have declared: “We’re surrounded. Good! Now we can fire in any direction.”

(Ever notice how chubby, balding little white Republlicans always get around to quoting Marines?  even though they wouldn’t dream of signing up and probably wouldn’t make it to Day Two on Parris Island?)

So, now the troops are all ears and Thiessen tells ‘em how to proceed:

STEP ONE: Stand your ground on taxes. You’ve already conceded hundreds of billions in new revenue through limiting deductions. If Obama refuses to compromise, pass legislation extending current tax rates for all Americans . . . In the short term, Americans may blame you. You can recover from that. What you will never recover from is surrendering your principles and giving up your brand as the party of low taxes and limited government.

STEP TWO: Go on the offensive. Immediately put forward a plan to fundamentally reform the tax code. You will be able to outbid Obama and the Democrats in any tax-cut fight. And the intellectual groundwork has already been done.

STEP THREE: Pass your plans. If the president refuses to negotiate and no progress is made by February, inform him that you will attach all or part of your plan to legislation raising the debt limit and pass it in the House. Then do so. Obama will sign it.

The GOP can prevail in the current face-off. Doing so will require the kind of fortitude more common in Marines than in members of Congress. Republicans need to put down their white flags and start fighting for their principles.

There is no dishonor in being surrounded — only in surrender.

Well, now . . . I guess Gen. Thiessen’s “armchair” isn’t equipped with a radio for receiving communiques from the front.  What collosally bad advice from a dimwit who shouldn’t receive space on Blogger let alone the Washington Post.  Even the lowest information voters in the country, right now, recognize the fact that Congressional Republicans are somewhat worse than useless and the electorate are anxious to further rid themselves of this pox on the body politic at their earliest convenience—which would be a little under two years from now.

Our man, Thiessen, is recommending that Republicans spend the next year reminding America of how useless, contentious and obstructionist Republicans can be by urging them to mount a replay of Iwo Jima to get their groove back.  Nobody was fooled by the Blame Obama for Bush’s Mess campaign and no one, but no one is hankering for any more congressional stalemates.  It’s been done . . . wasn’t a hit.

The GOP’s big problem is that it is viewed as a fractured, dysfunctional, incompetent political party.  Following Thiessen’s advice would only confirm that assessment.

 

Posted by Bette Noir on 12/11/12 at 10:54 AM • Permalink

Categories: PoliticsElection '12Election '14Nutters

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More from the column:

But when it comes to the debt limit, he does not have that luxury. He can’t default on our debt — the consequences are too catastrophic. So in the end he will cave.

Unless, of course, the President calls the bluff.  Which means either the Republicans will have to cave, or shoot the economy.

I realize that they’re not in full control of their pet Tea Party monsters, but when are the Chamber of Commerce and the NFIB going to call in that $1 billion favor they just cut the GOP?  I realize most of the GOP has the hot crazies, and would refuse to raise the debt ceiling, but the Big Money Boys have to be able to peel of a block of RINOs.

And the intellectual groundwork has already been done.

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahah!

What you will never recover from is surrendering your principles

...although riding roughshod over every single one of them from 2000 through 2008—was that really such a bad thing?  Sure, we turned a surplus into a deficit, ran two wars on a credit card, completely bungled an unnecessary invasion, and made three-quarters of the developed world hate us…But we got creationist pamphlets into the Grand Canyon gift shop, damn it.  Doesn’t that count for something?

My desire to dope-slap this guy is very, very high….

One of the BIG reasons that Republicans “Will Never Get Better” is their propensity for promoting nitwitty hacks who couldn’t hold their own in a high school debate club to positions of “thought leadership” in which they write “serious books,” post pseudo-intellectual op-eds for national publications and “win” fellowships to right-wing “think” tanks just like real people. 

The root of this problem is their reliance on legacy hires- Goldberg, Kristol, Podhoretz, Bozell… all are the children of movement figures.  The entire conservative movement has become the equivalent of the drooling, inbred royal families of post WWI Europe… the House of Saxe-Cobag if you will.

Ironic that they’re against affirmative action.

Is Thiessen a man—or a blancmange?

Is Thiessen a man—or a blancmange?

LOL, good question.  He also bears a strong resemblance to Casper the Ghost.

Is Thiessen a man—or a blancmange?

Not certain but he did order 48,000,000 kilts . . .

Poor Glenn Beck. I hope he does not get Thiessen’s Col. Chesty memo. I mean, Beck is the guy who said: ”...The truth is that they don’t surround us at all.  We surround them. Fire at will, guys.

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