Republican Convention Open Thread—Tuesday—The Fred W. Joementum Edition

I hadn’t planned on doing open threads for the RNC like we did for the DNC, but with the Bush/Thompson/Lieberman tri-feckless tonight and the introduction of the Wasilla PTA’s National Security Czar tomorrow, loading up some open threads as a guffaw catchers is probably a good idea.

Republican National Convention

Posted by Kevin K. on 09/02/08 at 03:11 PM • Permalink

Categories: PoliticsBedwettersElection '08St. McSameThe Late Slight HopeNuttersSarah PalinWar In ErrorSkull Hampers

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I just LOVE the fact that George (Honey I screwed the country) Bush decided that he needed to speak. The corporate telepromter readers are gonna need a LOT of lipstick to make that pig look pretty.
I made the mistake of tuning into “Morning Joe” , this morning when I first woke up. I had to quickly turn the channel before I went Elvis on my teevee. Did the RNC issue custom knee pads to the press , or did they have to buy them at the local Wal-Mart?

Yeah, Scarborough was pushing the “Sarah as victim” card pretty hard and Andrea Mitchell was ramming it through, too, on his show. Don’t think it will last. Several pundits looked borderline pissed about the selection this afternoon, including Michael Smerconish.

Well, Mrs. Palin has asked for a fight and now it appears she’s gonna get one.

Amato and C & L reports Hillary is gonna take her on. Really, Palin should just quit now. step-up-campaigning-against-palin/

Comment by HumboldtBlue on 09/02/08 at 05:12 PM

And Kev, you’re gonna love this site ...

Comment by HumboldtBlue on 09/02/08 at 05:29 PM

And Kev, you’re gonna love this site ...

Wow, I’m speechless.  I actually thought that was a parody site for a bit.  That’s hilarious.

And thanks for the link about Hillary (even though it eventually took me to TalkLeft, you bastard!).

BTW, I’m slowly weening off of the PUMAs, but this comment at Yes to Democracy was solid gold.

From “Fight the Smears”:

CNN’s Wolf Blitzer just announced that John McCain has decided to cancel his appearance on Larry King tonight over the shameful 2 hour segment on CNN’s Campbell Brown last night.

Of course he canceled. Everyone knows that it’s shameful for a journalist to get off their knees and try to make GOP bloviators actually back up their talking ponts with facts.

It was following the Brown interview that I decided to stick around and watch some more talking heads. I was shocked that Brown actually asked simple, journalist questions, and this tool, Tucker, was befuddled. I knew it would be a gold mine from there on in.

“And Kev, you’re gonna love this site ... “

I thought it was a parody too - are you sure it’s not?  OMG, if not, that’s the best they can do?  The “defenses” appear to be written by PUMAs.  “Lack of experience” completely cracked me up.  Bad, bad Obama for saying Wasilly (or slurring it - he’d been drinking?)

It’s also pretty funny about McC throwing his little temper tantrum over Campbell actually pressing Tucker to answer her question.  I’m just wondering how much better it’s all going to get.

Here’s the great quote they’re highlighting at the RNC for tonight’s line-up:

“Love of country, my friends, is another way of saying love of your fellow countrymen.”
—Sen. John McCain

That’s nearly as good as:

“A ship in harbor is safe, but that’s not why the ship is built.”

But not as good as:


I actually thought that was a parody site for a bit.

Well, to prove not only my bravery, but my secret sources, I got the link from Malkin’s site.

From Norm Coleman’s speech tonight:

John McCain has a face that says, “Yes.”

Apparently, so does Bristol.

Thanks, you’ve been a great audience.

As Aimai at Tom Hilton’s joint put it ... ouch.

Yup, this is gonna sting. ristol-palin-teen-pregnancy-distracting

Comment by HumboldtBlue on 09/02/08 at 07:42 PM

“A nuclear-tipped ICBM in a silo is safe, but that’s not why the missile is built.”

“A penis wrapped in a condom is safe, but that’s not why the penis is built.”

Try your own.

John McCain has a face that says, “Yes.”

It sure does .
He said YES,
To his NVA captors when they wanted him to make propaganda broadcasts for them during his POW years.
He said YES,
When Charles Keating asked him for help in wrecking the S&L;industry.
He said YES,
When Bush asked him to sell himself out and support torture as an acceptable American policy.
And apparently he said YES ,
When Dobson , Perkins , and the other Dominionist freaks asked him to pick an unqualified trailer park queen as his running mate.

Apparently, so does Bristol.

Yes but I’m sure the sex was purely for precreation, as God intended.

From the front page of MSNB.COM “Bush To Cite 9/11”.  Never would have seen that one coming!?

DRUNK-BLOGGING THE RNC (watching the C-SPAN version between snippets of MSNBC):

Republican interviewees in general: They can’t fucking believe McCain selected Palin and are still trying out versions of “it’s McCain’s choice” as a response.

A video collage of Teddy Roosevelt? WTF?

Rachael Lampra: Thank dog I’m neither a Christian nor a fan of “worship music.” It’s teh suck.

Barbara Bush: Still the Quaker Oats Man.

Tribute to George Bush I: A slap in the face to the 2nd—all the accomplishments enumerated—building a large coalition, etc.—are areas that are lacking in Bush the Lesser. McCain is, in a way, revenge of the father over the son.

Mittens: Where is the fucking love? He was bumped from the schedule and not reinstated as of this moment. J-Lo and Hewitt are weeping into their hope chests.

Arlen Specter and Orrin Hatch: Holy fuck, as usual, I got them mixed up and thought Arlen Hatch had grown hair within an hours’ time between interviews. Sorry.

Betty live drunk blogging, I knew it was gonna be a fun evening.

Here’s one for a chuckle that I picked up at GOS ...

Also, it appears the fucking redneck has been summoned to the convention. Wonder if they’ll let Maddow interview him.

Comment by HumboldtBlue on 09/02/08 at 08:36 PM

Barbara Bush: Still the Quaker Oats Man.

Damnit! I just passed a half shot of Jack Daniel through my nose.

And I hope J-Lo and Hewitt have their fainting couches handy , methinks the poutrage is just beginning.

I’m sorry, but this convention sucks, like the way a sump pump sucks.

These people are putting on a display of such a glaring lack of self awareness that it makes me think that one day, if I work hard enough, strive hard enough, I’ll be s starting strong safety for the Philadelphia Eagles.

John McCain has a face that says you know Halloween is over ‘cos the Jack o’ Lantern is starting to sag.

Yeah, I couldn’t bring myself to watch it live.  We taped it and watched Lars and the Real Doll instead (a really good, smart and oddly charming film). Afterwards we tried to watch it, but fast-forwarded a lot because Bianca had more life in her than both Thompson and Lieberman.

Thompson and Lieberman were like a two-stage lethal injection drip.

WHY do Republicans ALWAYS look like a Ralph Steadman drawing of Republicans?

John McCain has a face that says:

“Why is Chelsea Clinton so ugly?
Because her father is Janet Reno.”

And now his party has the cheek to complain when Palin’s “family values” come back to bite her in the ass.

“Consequently, the White House played down his Chelsea remarks”

Of course they did!  He didn’t have a (D) after his name!  I dunno how the hell these PUMA’s can bang on about how great he is when he said that about Chelsea.  Or do they just not have that long of an attention span?  Christ, if they end up with him they deserve all they get.

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