Rumproast Exclusive! Book Event Scrammed After Palin is Confronted by “Future Sarah” from 2013
In a dramatic development eerily echoing recent speculation that the potentially Cosmos-collapsing Large Hadron Collider Project is being retroactively sabotaged from the future in order to prevent it from destroying the Universe, Sarah Palin hastily exited a book-signing event in Noblesville, IN yesterday after she came face-to-face with her future self from four years hence.
Shown above (at left) in a photo published on Palin’s own Facebook site, the metal-clad “Future Sarah” reportedly presented the former Alaska Governor with a copy of the book she will write following her spectacular, crushing defeat by Barack Obama in the 2012 presidential election.
According to witnesses, Palin’s Jetson-like doppleganger asked her to sign the book, entitled Never Mind, then encouraged her to “buy gold, don’t sweat the small shit and absolutely DO NOT return those text messages from Ashton Kutcher.”
Autograph in hand, “Future Sarah” winked once, then vanished in a coruscating ball of red-white-and-blue sparks.
A pale, grim-faced Palin abruptly concluded the meet-and-greet and raced to her tour bus, leaving behind a crowd of angry, bewildered fans who will eventually derail her presidential prospects in November 2012 by voting for as-yet-unannounced TimeCube prophet Dr. Gene Ray.