The Grift that Just Stopped Giving

This is just a hit’n'run, but it looks like all former GOP Best of the Worst contestant Newt Gingrich’s business ventures have hit the same kind of skid his presidential ambitions did:

(Reuters) - ATLANTA - When he entered the race for the Republican presidential nomination in May 2011, Newt Gingrich was the prosperous head of a small empire commonly known as Newt Inc, which included both for-profit consultancies and nonprofit foundations.

Altogether, these entwined ventures pulled in more than $110 million over the past decade. Now the vestiges of this empire are mired in debt, as is Gingrich’s campaign fund.

I find this sad, in a way. When Griftrich started with the whole “I know, let’s run for President!” scam, I’m pretty sure he was just looking on it as a nice way to see the country and eat out a lot and sell books. It was all going to be kind of like a working vacation.  The problem was probably South Carolina. You know what I mean. Never believe your own bullshit. Once he started actually campaigning….that was it. Real campaigns are expensive.  Even more than Tiffany’s kind of expensive.

He even owes his good friend Herman Cain money. I wouldn’t want to owe Herman Cain money, would you? Those weird ads with the animals—they’re kind of like a warning of….something.

Anyway, even I, a person who has disliked Newt since, oh, the early ‘90’s, feels bad enough to want to do something. Probably toss quarters at his big old head if I ever see him, but you get the idea.

(You know, I was thinking of posting some more nonsense from the Breitbartlets’ Vettenings , but honestly, how dumb is this thing gonna get before it’s over? Obama might have had lower test scores than Bush? Wake me up when they get to “Is this gum wrapper on the ground Obama’s?  Is he a stone-cold litterbug?”)

Posted by Vixen Strangely on 05/22/12 at 10:45 PM • Permalink

Categories: PoliticsElection '12

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It’s even better than it looks.  Mr. Giant Head sold his old consulting biz to his former partners, and they were supposed to pay him $600,000 a year for a considerable length of time; this was currently Newty’s main source of income.  Oops.  Tiffany’s is rolling up the carpet as we speak. 

It gets even more schaden-y; the main focus of that firm was health care policy.  Those that paid ‘dues’ to the organization were health insurance companies, all of which were apparently quite pleased at one time that he was pushing an everyone must buy health insurance mandate.  Of course, once he got all that cable greenroom air up his nose he had to scream SOCIALISM!1!!! like every other rethug candidate (Teh Base, you know).  Once he denied that he supported a mandate, the dues income rather dried up and done kilt Newt’s spun-off cash cow. 

I guess he isn’t going to save civilization afterall.

Since it appears that we can now close the chapter on this odious little man’s career as a statesman, I thought it might be an appropriate time to remember exactly how he earned our contempt, with a compendium of Grinchy Grandiloquence over the years . . .

On his favorite subject:

“I’m not a natural leader. I’m too intellectual; I’m too abstract; I think too much.”

“I have enormous personal ambition. I want to shift the entire planet. And I’m doing it. I am now a famous person. I represent real power.”

“Gingrich primary mission: Advocate of civilization, definer of civilization, teacher of the rules of civilization, leader of the civilizing forces.” (Describing himself).

“It doesn’t matter what I do. People need to hear what I have to say. There’s no one else who can say what I can say. It doesn’t matter what I live.”

“She isn’t young enough or pretty enough to be the President’s wife.” (Speaking of his ex-wife).

On politics:

“The idea that a Congressman would be tainted by accepting money from private industry or private sources is essentially a socialist argument.”

“I think one of the great problems we have in the Republican Party is that we don’t encourage you to be nasty. We encourage you to be neat, obedient, loyal and faithful and all those Boy Scout words.”

“If the Soviet empire still existed, I’d be terrified. The fact is, we can afford a fairly ignorant presidency now.”

“The problem isn’t too little money in political campaigns, but not enough.”

On domestic policy:

“Give the park police more ammo.” Explaining what to do about the homeless problem a few days after the police shot and killed a homeless person in front of the White House.

“This is one of the great tragedies of the Bush administration. The more successful they’ve been at intercepting and stopping bad guys, the less proof there is that we’re in danger…. It’s almost like they should every once in a while have allowed an attack to get through just to remind us.” (Yes, a 2008 quote advocating another terrorist attack on the United States.

Describing Medicare - “Now, we don’t get rid of it in round one because we don’t think that that’s politically smart, and we don’t think that’s the right way to go through a transition. But we believe it’s going to wither on the vine because we think people are voluntarily going to leave it, voluntarily.”

On Freedom:

“A mere forty years ago, beach volleyball was just beginning. No bureaucrat would have invented it, and that’s what freedom is all about.”

RIP Grinch

You forgot:

‘People like me are what stands between us and Auschwitz.’

You’re right, @Foregone, I had to be selective lest I take up a few more miles of thread than I’m entitled to . . . it’s out there, though.  Pure Americana.

And now that he’s a super Catholic, he’s stuck with Calista.

Hey, all his businesses and campaigns may be bankrupt, but no thanks to him, he still has Social Security and Medicare, right?

My own personal opinion is, if he really needs the dough, there’s always being a janitor.

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