Wingnut gift ideas

It’s tough to buy for the wingnut who has everything. If you’re wondering what to get for the wingnuts on your holiday [heh!] gift list, we can help.

Thanks to Rumproast commenter Markles, I discovered this wonderful site that made my wingnut holiday shopping a snap. Here are just a few of its fine products:

“Jesus Hates It When You Smoke” Ashtray

Your body is a temple, and Jesus doesn’t appreciate your filling His inner sanctum with acrid smoke and stinky nicotine one little bit. Let the wingnut in your life remind smokers of this every time they tap their ashes.

Pro-Life Fetus Cookie Cutter

Fetuses and snowflake babies alike are so very precious that sometimes, the avid pro-lifer would like to just gobble them up. Now they can without risk to their immortal souls.

“Kiss Me, I’m Persecuted!” Mug

We all know how tough it is being a Christian in a country thoroughly dominated by fellow Christians at every level. Allow the wingnuts in your life to savor their sad fate along with their morning coffee each and every day.

These were my personal favorites, but check out the site for yourself. Oh, and I should admit that at first I thought the site was serious—hey, there are sites that sell post-Rapture pet food dispensers in all earnestness, after all. But their tagline, “What a trend we have in Jesus!” disabused me of that notion.

[H/T Shriller Than You]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 12/10/09 at 07:19 AM • Permalink

Categories: Politics • Bedwetters • Nutters • Relijun •

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Wingnuts don’t exchange presents at Christmas. They give each other the unregulated entrepreneurial space they need to earn Christmas gifts by using their God-given liberty and talents to create competitive goods and services for a marketplace that rewards innovation…or fail nobly in the effort, lose everything and commit suicide, depending on the breaks.

Comment by StrangeAppar8us on 12/10/09 at 09:14 AM

I want the fetus cookie cutter! And Strange, you are a wise, wise human.

Comment by Donna on 12/10/09 at 10:25 AM

I’m getting the ashtray for my MIL.

Comment by justlen on 12/10/09 at 11:10 AM

My favorites from Miss Poppy’s catalog are the After Rapture Mints and the book “How to Argue with an Annoying Christian Using the Bible”.

Great stocking stuffers.

Comment by Glix on 12/10/09 at 12:36 PM

Slightly OT: a strange artist friend of mine years ago built a little contraption consisting of a battery-operated disembodied hand (a la Thing in the Addams Family) and a soup spoon he bought at a Salvation Army that had a handle in the shape of a cross and the legend “Someday We’ll All Eat With Jesus” stamped on it.

I told him that the prospect of eating with Jesus was actually exciting and novel for me—being raised Catholic, all I’d ever been allowed to do was eat Jesus.