Former Vice President Cheney to Matt Lauer this morning:
“I don’t think that it [the Iraq war] damaged our reputation around the world. I just don’t believe that. I think the critics at home want to argue that. In fact, I think it was sound policy that dealt with a very serious problem and eliminated Saddam Hussein from the kind of problem he presented before.”
Here on Planet Earth, the other nations that collectively bestow our “reputation” watched our Iraq war murder-suicide-faceplant in the horrified fascination with which a passerby might attend a loud, belligerent drunk’s demonstration of his puppy-and-Hattori-Hanzō-sword-juggling act. Cheney could look it up.
One of the serious drawbacks to being an atheist is knowing that there is no hell in which smug, lying bastards like Cheney will eventually roast. Pity.
It’s damn near impossible to heap too much derision on a blinkered hack like Jonah Goldberg of NRO. Goldberg’s latest column, “My Rick Perry Problem—and Ours,” comes in for its share of righteous ridicule.
As in most Goldberg columns, every hoary trope is hauled forth and lovingly fondled—libruls hate Jeebus, libruls think Southerners and Midwesterners are stupid, libruls look down upon state university graduates, libruls squeal like little girls at the sight of a firearm, etc. But within that loaf of lazy clichés and outright falsehoods glints a kernel of something that almost approaches insight:
Conservatism is starting to have an identity-politics problem all its own. I think conservatism needs to spend less time defending candidates for who they are, and more time supporting candidates for what they intend to do.
Perhaps “insight” it too strong a word, but we’re talking Jonah Fucking Goldberg here. I’d say it qualifies as a relative sort of insight, akin to the epiphany of a particularly dull, Easter chick-loving assembly line trainee at Purdue Pressed Chicken Parts who dimly perceives that his employer may not be as devoted to animal welfare as he originally thought.
Now that the Libyan “squirmish” she opposed has resulted in the apparent ouster of Moammar Gadhafi, America’s Backseat Driver™ has issued some helpful tips on handling the aftermath via Facebook:
First, the White House needs to avoid triumphalism.
Har-dee-fucking-har-har! THIS White House always avoids triumphalism. It’s you Republican jackasses who should have “Avoid Triumphalism” tattooed on your goddamned foreheads.
Second, we must be very concerned about the future government that will emerge to take Gaddafi’s place… We should work through diplomatic means to help those who want democracy to come out on top.
Ya think? I’m sure Hillary is on it, hon.
That said, we should not commit U.S. troops or military assets to serve as peacekeepers or perform humanitarian missions or nation-building in Libya. Our military is already over-committed and strained, and a vaguely designed mission can be the first step toward a quagmire.
A “quagmire” is what the president has thus far avoided in Libya, chiefly by ignoring the advice of the neocon assholes in the Republican Party like your former running mate.
Finally, we must make sure that terrorist groups don’t try to co-opt the revolution, as Al Qaeda is trying to do in Syria. We should continue to use our intelligence assets to monitor the situation in Libya to ensure that potentially dangerous weapons are secured, and that terrorist organizations such as Al Qaeda don’t gain a foothold in Libya.
I’m betting Mssrs. Petraeus, Panetta and Morell are way ahead of you, Snowflake Snooki. Along with every other sentient creature on the planet.
People of Libya, be vigilant. May this opportunity be used to build a free and peaceful country.
Don’t the people of Libya have enough worries without being lectured by this raving, egocentric twit? Yep. All of us have, come to think of it.
Sarah Palin’s adorable sidekick Greta Van Susteren was interviewing Fox colleague Karl “Turdblossom” Rove about the effect of the Bush Depression on Republican prospects for the 2012 race, Obama’s elitist vacation, etc. The subject turned—as ever—to other Fox colleague Sarah “Quitting Bull” Palin, Rove’s recent remarks about her getting into the 2012 race and Team Quitting Bull’s caustic response to Rove’s speculation. From the transcript (because I can’t get the bloody, buggery video code):
ROVE: Yes. Well, first of all, I do assume she—she—when her—when SARAHPAC issues a statement, I assume that Governor Palin authorized the statement. So she knew exactly what SARAHPAC was going to say. But look, here’s the deal…
VAN SUSTEREN: I didn’t even know about, but OK.
ROVE: Oh, yes. Yes, that’s where—that’s where—that’s where her comment came from was a statement put out by SARAHPAC. But look, she’s a big—she’s a potentially big factor in the presidential election. If she were to get in, she’d be a “contenda,” as they would say. She was the vice presidential nominee in 2008. She maintains a following.
There are people who want her in and there are some people who would be deeply concerned if she did because she’d be eating into their—into their ranks. But she’s a player. And so if she doesn’t want to be speculated about, then end the speculation by saying, “I’m not going to be a candidate.”
Until then, I would just recommend she might get a slightly thicker skin because if she’s got this thin a skin now, when people are saying, Well, I think she might be a candidate, what kind of—how’s she going to react if she does get into the campaign and gets the scrutiny that every presidential candidate does get? I mean, that’s not going to be a pretty sight if she’s as thin-skinned in the fray as she is on the edges of it.
At that point, the interview was abruptly cut off with a “breaking news alert” about Steve Jobs’ resignation, which was definitely NOT breaking news at that hour. You can see the clip at The Raw Story here.
Rove also says he suspects Palin would be whining about LACK of coverage if no one was paying attention to her. Those are probably the truest words the cretinous bastard has ever uttered in his miserable life.
Rush Limbaugh’s little bro David tweeted this picture because he thinks it helps the Perry campaign. The Perry campaign thinks so too, responding to a request for comment from Politico (cursed be its name) with, “A picture is worth a thousand words.”
Now, if you embrace the Limbaugh worldview, military machismo sets your man-boobs aquiver. (The military service of others, that is; when it comes to actual shootin’ wars, chickenhawks like Rush Limbaugh tend to punk out with an ass cyst or deferment of some sort.) To that mindset, this photo spread would indeed redound to the credit of the codpiece wearer while evoking pleasurable ooga-booga sensations vis-à-vis the president with the scary middle name.
But there are fewer and fewer Americans every year who can be manipulated by such primitive means, Allah be praised. As Steve M points out, if the last several presidential elections are any indication, Americans do not require their leaders to have served in the military, preferring instead to evaluate candidates on rigorous standards such as “he would be fun to have a beer with” or “he has a cool campaign logo.”
But aside from uselessly beating the long-deceased horse of military service, Perry’s codpiece photo might have the unintended consequence of further solidifying the connection between Perry and the original Commander Codpiece. Since he already comes across as a cheap Shrub knock-off, I don’t think Perry can afford to reinforce that meme.
PS: Does the Limbaugh (k)clan own the white-sheet franchise in Missouri? Rush Limbaugh has been a public racist cretin for three decades now, and his little brother thinks it’s amusing to label an African American man “boy.” If I were unfortunate enough to be related to those creeps, I think I’d change my last name to something a bit less toxic. “Bedford-Forrest” perhaps.
Now that the Gaddafi regime, which is older than Jennifer Aniston, appears to be collapsing, it’ll be fascinating to watch the post-collapse spin, given the way the conflict was framed by US politicians. Those more sympathetic toward the president tended to describe NATO’s involvement as an “intervention,” as if it featured family members surprising Libya in a room and tearfully voicing their concerns about its self-destructive behavior.
The Republicans, however, have insisted all along that it was a “war,” or, more specifically, “Obama’s war.” Modern-day Republicans are wondrously fond of war, but they made an exception for “Obama’s war.” Even the most hawkish donned love beads and headbands and created colorful “Make Love, Not War” posters to carry as they converged on the Capitol in a massive anti-war demonstration.
Over the past couple of days, Rush Limbaugh “joked” that Kraft Foods will name their new “biracial” Oreo cookie after President Obama and called the president’s bus tour the “White Like Me” tour. I know – dog bites man, sun rises in the East, etc.
But let’s not ever forget that this is the same corpulent toad who receives slobbering tributes from Republican presidents and before whom all Republican office holders tremble. For the most recent example, recall that John Boehner delivered on-air briefings to Limbaugh during the debt ceiling debate. Though his hateful drivel would be more at home on a StØrmfrØnt podcast than on FCC-licensed airwaves, Limbaugh is clearly a key figure in the Republican Party.
So here’s a big boo-fucking-hoo to all the wingnuts who whine about their injured feelings when someone says the Republican Party contains practically every racist shithead in America, and screw anyone on our side who scolds Democrats for pointing that out. When the Republican Party stops kissing Rush Limbaugh’s racist ass, I’ll entertain the notion that they’ve made progress. Until then, fuck them.
So Rick Perry made it official, throwin’ out great drippin’ chunks of red-meat Jeebus, Exceptionalism and Not-Spreadin’-the-Wealth at the RedState confab. Times are tough, so anyone who wins the Republican nomination has a shot at unseating Mr. Obama.
But I don’t think Perry’s entry improves the quality of the GOP candidate pool. He combines the energy of Fred Thompson with the sincerity of John Edwards, the intellectual rigor of Sarah Palin, the economic acumen of Michele Bachmann and the humility of Rand Paul—all delivered in the style of Will Ferrell’s George W. Bush impression.
I think that last quality will resonate most negatively with low-info voters. By being a monumental fuck-up, George W. Bush not only plunged this nation into its most precarious position since the Great Depression—he blighted the nascent national ambitions of his smarter younger brother Jeb. It would be fitting if Perry finds his presidential aspirations dashed on that same rock.
UPDATE—Photo and excerpt from Governor Goodhair’s college transcript below the fold…
As they did during another crisis incident faced by the Obama administration (the BP spill), media types and emogressives are urging the president to get riled up over the shitty economy. Obama is too damn squishy and effete, they complain. So professorial. He lacks “fire in the belly.”
Perhaps they’re forgetting another reality as this beleaguered president tries to manage and mitigate America’s ongoing nervous breakdown: Where they see a too-cool customer who needs to get fired up and start swinging at the opposition, the other half of this bipolar nation sees a scary black man who wants to get whitey.
Conventional wisdom holds that an incumbent president can’t get reelected while presiding over a profoundly shitty economy and the rampant misery caused by high unemployment. This has held true in the elections I’m old enough to remember.
But it’s probably a mistake to apply recent history to the current situation, which is more dire than any but the very oldest among us can recall. Will America stick with President Obama? Too soon to know, but I think his chances are better than conventional wisdom would indicate.
With the exception of Hillary Clinton—who was a formidable opponent for the Dem nomination—President Obama has been extremely fortunate in his political enemies. This year, the irresponsible teatards played the wild-eyed, raving nut-sack role formerly played by Alan Keyes.
Former Nixon, Reagan, Bush I and Clinton flak David Gergen wrote a CNN piece in which he laments the absence of a modern-day Churchill—someone who instills calm and focus and builds consensus. I think he’s half full of crap and half onto something (as usual).
In the end, every civilization dies of stupid, and America will be no exception. I’ve long suspected this, of course, but the point was driven home to me this morning by an email forward I received containing the comments of several wingnut relatives / friends.
First, a little back-story: These are middle-class people who, although they live better than 99% of the inhabitants of the planet are, like me, hurting in this endless economic shitpile and truly worried that things could go all Mad Max if it gets any worse.
These are not stupid people (despite the title of this post and allusion to death-by-stupid above). They can walk in a rainstorm without drowning. They hold responsible jobs. They’re conventionally educated to varying degrees. They’re warm, funny and generous to boot.
But the shit they believe makes me want to want to reverse-engineer the motor on my shop vac to create a high-capacity bourbon-bong for my exclusive use. The email in question concerns President Obama’s presser during the debt ceiling debacle and the response on the Senate floor by Florida’s wingnut pin-up squish Marco Rubio.
Nothing raises my hackles like a political conversation that starts with “both sides do…” because 999 times out of a thousand, what follows is pure, unadulterated bullshit. But here’s that one in a thousand case of true equivalency: Both sides do contain way more than their fair share of puling infants.
First there’s the right-wing freak-out over the identification of self-proclaimed Christian Anders Behring Breivik as a “Christian” and a fan of anti-Islam hate sites like Atlas Shrugs. Sorry, but that’s what he calls himself. And if you’ve spent the last decade shrieking “GLOBAL JIHAD” every time a Muslim jaywalks, you don’t get to yell “BLOOD LIBEL” when one of your fans takes your eliminationist rhetoric to its logical conclusion.
John McCain, who is a “maverick” on the planet where “maverick” is synonymous with “weather vane,” sensed a shift in the wind and took to the Senate floor to denounce the “tea-party Hobbits” who are threatening to toss our economy into the fires of Mount Doom:
The idea seems to be that if the House GOP refuses to raise the debt ceiling, a default crisis or gradual government shutdown will ensue, and the public will turn en masse against . . . Barack Obama. The Republican House that failed to raise the debt ceiling would somehow escape all blame. Then Democrats would have no choice but to pass a balanced-budget amendment and reform entitlements, and the tea-party Hobbits could return to Middle Earth having defeated Mordor.
This is the kind of crack political thinking that turned Sharron Angle and Christine O’Donnell into GOP Senate nominees. The reality is that the debt limit will be raised one way or another, and the only issue now is with how much fiscal reform and what political fallout.
Of course, McCain neglected to mention that he attempted to foist Angle the Crackpot Hobbit off on America by campaigning for her. Nor did he allude to the fact that he elevated the Queen of the Teatards to the national stage by choosing Quitting Bull as his running mate in 2008.
Though free to choose my friends, I am powerless to choose my family and neighbors. Thus, I often receive fascinating insights into the thinking of rural, conservative Floridians—Fox News viewing, Rush Limbaugh-listening, Confederate flag-displaying voters of the type who elected (P)Rick Scott as the state’s governor and think Sarah Palin would be a good president.
So here’s what I’ve learned the past couple of weeks over back-fence beers, community boat motor-teardowns and tractor-pull play-dates: These folks are PISSED about this debt ceiling thing. Not at Obama (although they still reflexively despise him)—at Boehner and the Republican members of the House and Senate.
Something that has been blindingly obvious to us libtards for decades—that the GOP’s top priority is to transfer ever-larger shares of the nation’s wealth to the top 1%—is finally beginning to dawn on the working class conservatives I know.
Now, I realize “anecdote” does not equal “data.” I have no idea how this debt ceiling thing will eventually shake out. And did I mention these folks hate Obama’s guts? But still, little shards of reality seem to be piercing the Fox News Armor of Ignorance.
Some Republicans are already declaring victory. They’re crowing about how, no matter what happens, they’ve managed to preserve corporate jet owner and hedge fund manager tax breaks while boning the middle class. God knows their end-zone dance isn’t entirely without justification, as many liberals have noted.
But by showing themselves to be fat cat-coddling bullies, by so nakedly sowing the seeds of top-down class warfare, the Republicans may have lost Uncle Tater for good. And if they lose Uncle Tater, they may just reap the whirlwind.
