Knee Slappers

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Where’s the Beef Jerky, Mr. President?: “Spicy Town” is a Poster Child for America’s Moral Decline

My God, what a hellhole—a gutted, trash-strewn Abattoir of Dreams where Socialism’s failed human Petri cultures scrounge for rods of dry, salted cow-flesh and enlist in steel-cage matches with Mexican luchadores, evil ninjas, obese Social Security Disability sponges and scary robots because government-subsidized Liberal education has damned them to a life of Hopeless Parasitism and nihilistic thrill-seeking. Only when these opportunity-deprived zombies are gnawing on processed tube-meat and being kicked shitless by a mechanical man in a diving helmet do they feel truly alive

You can tour this Bailed-Out, Demand-Side Obamaville of Depradation here...or view a couple of quick snapshots below the fold.

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Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 08/29/10 at 01:30 PM
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Categories: Knee SlappersMessylaneous

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Wee-kenduh!

Funny if you’ve been bombarded by obnoxious NYT commercials:

[H/T: Sully]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 08/24/10 at 10:34 AM
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Categories: Knee SlappersPoliticsOur Stupid MediaYouTubidity

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

J-Lo & the rest of the conservative kiddy table

7. Kathryn Jean Lopez, The National Review

"The Virgin"

Approximate Age: 34

Accomplishments: Lopez has worked for the National Review for a third of her life. Her reign as editor of its blog, The Corner, has been marked by very little actual editing (did you know Martin Luther King Jr.’s wife’s name was Loretta?), at least one sentence from May 25, 2004 that should be remembered—“If the radio gig doesn’t work out[,] Al Franken can always run for Senate”—and pom-poms whenever gays suffers a civil rights setback. The Corner perch has given Lopez entrée to the Wall Street Journal, the Washington Times and the cable networks.

Fun Fact: From her Amazon wish list: The Nanny: Complete Season 4, The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries: Season One and an Israeli paratrooper bag.

Antecedent: None. Lopez is a true original. Never in the history of American letters has an editor had so little grasp of basic sentence structure.

You know you want to read the rest...

Posted by Kevin K. on 08/18/10 at 07:56 AM
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Categories: Knee SlappersPoliticsNuttersPoliblogsOur Stupid Media

Friday, August 13, 2010

Tasers, Diamonds and Crime-Scene Tape: Michelle Does Spain in Chinese 3D

I was willing to forgive her for EVERYTHING until I saw that starving cartoon cowboy attack a video wall. Shame on you, First Tourist!

Plus, did it ever occur to anyone that SPAIN IS THE SOURCE OF ALL ILLEGAL HISPANICS? Coincidence…or conspiracy?

I don’t get the ending, though, because, GODDAMN IT, EVERYBODY LIKES CAKE!

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 08/13/10 at 10:41 AM
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Categories: Knee SlappersNewsPoliticsBarack ObamaOur Stupid MediaYouTubidity

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Goodbye, Bwa-Ha-Ha and Get Your Own Goddamn Peanuts, You Bastard Pricks!

nbcnewyork.com serves up this inspired CGI re-enactment of JetBlue Flight Attendant Steven Slater’s post-landing crackup and swashbuckling flounce, following an altercation with a passenger who dropped the door of an overhead luggage bin on Slater’s head after being asked to keep his gear stowed until the plane came to a stop.

The video was produced by Next Media Animation, the Taiwanese group that previously brought us CGI reconstructions of Tiger Woods’ truck crash and Al Gore’s alleged encounter with a hotel masseuse.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 08/11/10 at 10:37 AM
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Categories: Knee SlappersNews

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis: Steve Carell

[H/T: HuffPo]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 08/04/10 at 02:35 PM
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Stephen Colbert’s masterful destruction of Laura Ingraham

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Laura Ingraham
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes2010 ElectionFox News

[via CityCountryMe]

Posted by Kevin K. on 08/04/10 at 11:20 AM
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Sunday, August 01, 2010

Laughingstock! Uni-Tea Speakers Outnumber Minori-Tea Listeners at Philly Blove-In

Dammit, Keep The Cameras On Me!
Here is mercifully short Part IV of Big Blightblurt’s monologue from yesterday’s grand gathering of peaceful Tea Partiers of every creed and color gaggle of Foxwatching paleopensioners.

There’s a half-hour of this stuff; I brought you the shortest clip, which goes conspiracy/Journolist/smear Mary Frances Berry, Big Gubmint’s newest out-of-contextual experiment in its drive to maintain the brand as go-to site for slandering black women.

Note the lack of interest in much larger crowd across the street, though comparison is difficult since the Bigs are not so much into showing their multicultural audience. At all. Talking Points Memo has a picture which pretty much echoes yesterday’s. Wee The Peepull run the gamut from A to B!

Posted by Mrs. Polly on 08/01/10 at 10:07 AM
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Categories: Knee SlappersPoliticsNuttersTeabaggery

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Toy Story 3: Inception

I’ve seen both of these movies!!!! Yay for me! [via Oliver]

Posted by Kevin K. on 07/28/10 at 09:27 AM
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Categories: Knee SlappersMoviesYouTubidity

Monday, July 26, 2010

Ten-Second Psychotherapy for Non-Creative-Class Progressives

Just having one of those days, while I endeavor to find some looming controversy that’s actually topical in 2010, rather than two years ago.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 07/26/10 at 03:32 PM
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Categories: Knee SlappersPoliticsBedwetters

Friday, July 23, 2010

Friday Night Obscurity Overload: “Jekyll & Hyde Together Again” Half Dubbed In German

I know what you’re thinking, but bear with me. This video includes shit you’ll never see anywhere else:

1. Mark Blankfield, the greatest physical comedian since Buster Keaton (although you can’t tell from this clip), in an absolutely kitchen-clean print of a hopelessly underrated dumb comedy from 1982 about a kindly surgeon who snorts white powder and turns into a Deranged Disco Freak.

2. George Chakiris. Period.

3. Tim Thomerson (Jack Deth, Dollman) at a time when he still had half a chance of being a slick, romantic lead.

4. The invention of the phrase “Putzpuller Prize.”

5. Possibly the greatest in-your-face, “I Yam What I Yam” male stripping anthem ever written, complete with soul-trio back-up.

6. “Some follow their hearts, I follow my nose. Some put on airs, I TAKE OFF MY CLOTHES.”

Plus, it’s partly dubbed in German, which lends the whole thing an air of disturbing Weimar menace that is absent from the original.

Don’t thank me—it’s Friday.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 07/23/10 at 07:55 PM
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Categories: Knee SlappersMessylaneousSkull HampersYouTubidity

Thursday, July 22, 2010

BumpIt McCarthy Can’t Save Sinking Trawler; Palin Promoting Puerile Periodical

Palin Comparison

Once again, the Daily Caller is trying to hype its possession of purloined JournoList emails, with its usual blithe disregard for its own promise of “breaking news.” However, while the rest of the nation focuses on Shirley Sherrod, Tucker Carlson is bound and determined to get all the mileage he can out of his compendium of keyhole-listening, and push the story he’d like to be above the fold. Yesterday’s “JournoLister is helping decide where reporters sit in the White House Briefing room!” made hardly a plop, much less a splash, for the love of Heaven! Is anybody there? Does anybody care? Dear God, will the carnage never end?     

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Posted by Mrs. Polly on 07/22/10 at 05:09 PM
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Categories: ImagesKnee SlappersNewsPoliticsOur Stupid Media

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Quote of the Day

John Cole in response to Peter Daou:

Just go the full emo and cut yourself, for chrissakes.

image

Heh.

[H/T: TS at Instaputz]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 07/13/10 at 04:28 PM
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Categories: Knee SlappersPoliticsManic Progressives

Thursday, July 08, 2010

Maru the Cat & the Laundry Box (plus Double Rainbow bonus tracks)

Maru!!!!

BONUS FUNNY VIDEO: If you aren’t one of the million plus people who saw it this weekend ... IT’S A DOUBLE RAINBOW ALL THE WAY!!!! WHAT DOES THIS MEAN????

MORE: Of course, there were the inevitable Double Rainbow remix and parody videos. Fortunately, some of them are really, really funny.  We’ll start with something froggy from Rumproast pal James Urbaniak...

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Posted by Kevin K. on 07/08/10 at 08:07 AM
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Categories: CrittersKnee SlappersYouTubidity

Tuesday, July 06, 2010

Mike! Mike! Mike Weinstein!

Ladies and gents, we finally have the “Hillary4U&Me” of the 2010 campaign cycle, except unlike Clinton, Weinstein’s campaign actually paid for this:

[h/t Jedediah T. Clowncar]

Posted by Kevin K. on 07/06/10 at 06:55 PM
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