Movie News

Friday, June 24, 2011

RIP Peter Falk

Wishing he would get up and say, “Oh, by the way, there’s just one more thing…”

[H/T to Oblomova for the video clip. And right back atcha.]

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/24/11 at 02:00 PM

Categories: MoviesMovie News

Saturday, June 11, 2011

What Is the Sound of Two Hands Fapping?

Stephen K. Bannon loves the film he made about Sarah Palin. Sean Hannity loves the film Stephen K. Bannon made about his fellow Fox employee, Sarah Palin. Both of them barely escape devastating bukkake-inflicted facial injuries in this steamy exchange of hot Grizzly love.

Thanks to Betty Cracker and Dan Riehl for making Sarah-fapping the most exciting development in big-screen film enjoyment since the false-bottom popcorn bag.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/11/11 at 12:42 PM

Friday, June 10, 2011

Apparently, Batman Doesn’t Need a Boozy, Chain-Smoking Sidekick Who Looks Like Ozzy Osbourne

With its rivers, overlooks, funiculars, architecturally-distinctive ethnic neighborhoods and miniature-megalopolis skyline, Pittsburgh gets routinely tapped to serve as the cinematic stunt-double for other, more expensive locations. So it’s not totally surprising — but still kind of geeky-cool — that Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight Rises will be filming some sequences here. We won’t be subbing for Gotham, but it’s satisfying enough just to be considered sufficiently strange to fit into Nolan’s idiosyncratic visual universe:

Pittsburgh is an old, oft-misrepresented, and deeply weird city. With its streets that twist about and dead-end without warning, the city’s organizing principle is nonsense. You don’t vacation in Pittsburgh unless you have family or friends there, and even then you need every breadcrumb trail at your disposal to navigate in the post-industrial cacophony of ethnicities and aesthetics.

Casting for extras begins tomorrow, but I’m not really enthused about my options:

Casting directors are looking for individuals to play prisoners/thugs, guards, police officers, business men and women and sports fans.

That pretty much limits me to “prisoner/thug” — which is right up my alley, sure. But it’s a popular look in this town, and there’s gonna be a hell of a lot of competition. 

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 06/10/11 at 08:05 PM

Categories: Geek SpeakMoviesMovie News

Friday, May 27, 2011

Iowa Shrugs - “Palin: The Movie” already a clunker?

The barely awaited million-dollar Palin docuvertisement at which we’ve been laughing our socks off in anticipation looks like it’s going to hit a similar snag to the cult flop Atlas Shrugs unless there’s some devastatingly cunning strategy behind its release during the hastily cobbled together Tragical Blustery Tour.

It’s all very well producing a movie, but how do you get it before the eyes of an eager audience, let alone an unconvinced one? The Demoines Register isn’t encouraging:

“Typical political movies don’t do two cents at the box office,” said Brian Fridley, a co-owner of R.L Fridley Theatres Inc., which has 22 locations and 89 screens in Iowa. “No one cares but the Kool-Aid drinkers, whether they’re on the right or the left.”
Some Republicans in Iowa have said they’ve written off a Palin candidacy, partly because of her lack of activity here.

But volunteers not affiliated with Palin continue to feverishly organize support throughout the state on her behalf.
Denise Mahon, owner of the Varsity Theatre near Drake University in Des Moines, said no one has approached her about running the picture, and she has little interest in it. But out of curiosity, Mahon called her New York distributor today to try to track down details about where in Iowa the film will debut.

Fridley, who described himself as an independent-thinking Republican, said he hasn’t been asked to carry the film — and won’t unless film tracking surveys show it would be popular. “We give films priority as to what’s going to do business at the box office and what are good films we’d like the public to see that may have been looked over,” Fridley said.

Fridley said he personally finds Palin “annoying.”

“Why would you do a movie? Are you going to judge your candidacy on whether people want to see the movie or not?” he said. “I think she really shot herself in the foot when she couldn’t put up with the pressure as governor. How is she going to be as president? If she’s under pressure, is she just going to resign?”

Unless Fox makes the arguably illegal move of airing it, which given its length alone is pretty well out of the question, expect it to debut to the faithful few in some hastily hired venue yet to be announced, then probably go the samizdat route via Youtube before sinking without trace.

But the Register did manage to find one person who was enthusiastic:

Avowed Palin supporter Richard Rogers, 61, of West Des Moines said he was excited about the film.

“It’s likely to be helpful because I think a lot of people are confused or unaware what really was happening when she returned to Alaska after the 2008 campaign,” said Rogers, a professional pilot and regional director for Polk and Story counties for the national grassroots group Organize4Palin. “It will kind of be a second introduction.”

The people who’re most confused about what was happening when Palin returned to Alaska after being soundly trounced in the election are her remaining fans. If the media get behind it, it may gain some legs just because it’s Palin and stories about her always attract eyes, but it should also invite scrutiny of the many other threads that remain as yet unraveled from the heaping pile of fail that was Palin’s half-term as semi-detached governor, a number of which are dozing dogs she might be better advised to let lie.

h/t Politicususa

Posted by YAFB on 05/27/11 at 09:29 AM

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

The Crass Picture Show

              Oafs and Fishes

First, there were the “books.” Then, the “reality” show. But brace for impact, America: it’s Sarah Palin, the Movie! Filmed in secrecy and Alaska, the two-hour Grand Delusion helmed AND funded to the tune of a cool million by conservaloon Stephen K. Bannon (of Generation Zero er, fame) should be hitting the screens in June, Fox willing and the projectors don’t mysteriously shut down after the first hour.

But why bother with the rest of the news of the day, or going on with your life, when you could be alarming your friends and frightening your co-workers by howling at John Cole’s Balloon Juice thread of threads? Go.  I’m sorry about your sides, but they’ll stop aching in a few weeks.(H/T YAFB)

read the whole post »

Posted by Mrs. Polly on 05/25/11 at 11:00 AM

Categories: ImagesKnee SlappersMoviesMovie NewsPoliticsElection '12NuttersSarah PalinTeabaggeryPolisnark

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

“Atlas Shrugged” Sequels Scrapped; Galt Halt Critics’ Fault, Says Film Exec

So let me get this straight: John Aglialoro spent $20 million to assemble a turgid, preachy morality play with the mass appeal of a Brazilian He-Wax, then tried to boostrap it into theaters by inciting a populist demand-side uprising among “Atlas” fans who don’t live within 45 miles of a cinema, and were perfectly happy to wait for the DVD. But it’s not his fault the film began to tank almost before the house lights came up on its opening weekend. No, that was the work of collectivist weaklings and social parasites like Roger Ebert and P. J. O’Rourke.

Oh, how very Randian.

Of course, you know what comes next. Because when the going gets Galt, the Galts get gone:

“Critics, you won,” said John Aglialoro, the businessman who spent 18 years and more than $20 million of his own money to make, distribute and market “Atlas Shrugged: Part 1,” which covers the first third of Rand’s dystopian novel. “I’m having deep second thoughts on why I should do Part 2.”


“Why should I put up all of that money if the critics are coming in like lemmings?” Aglialoro said. “I’ll make my money back and I’ll make a profit, but do I wanna go and do two? Maybe I just wanna see my grandkids and go on strike.”

So maybe we won’t have Dagny Taggart to kick around any more, and maybe we’ll never get to see what John Galt looks like when he finally de-lurks. But we’ll always have poker.

Aglialoro, who is chief executive of the exercise equipment manufacturer Cybex, said he is not completely finished with Hollywood, however. An avid poker player who won the U.S. Poker Championship in 2004, he has a dramatic script called “Poker Room” in development. “Maybe the critics will be kinder to that one,” he said.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 04/27/11 at 05:22 PM

Categories: MoviesMovie NewsPoliticsNutters

Friday, April 15, 2011

Stephen Moore, John Fund and Bob Beckel’s Unemployed Brother Bullish on “Atlas” Movie

Meanwhile, Cal Thomas wishes Ayn Rand hadn’t hated God quite so much…and Grant Bowler wishes he were someplace else.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 04/15/11 at 03:48 PM

Categories: MoviesMovie NewsPoliticsNuttersTeabaggery

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Autocracy Rocks!: Stabny Daggert Totally Sticks It to Commie Liberal Union Thug Parasite

New scene from Atlas Shrugged: Part 1. Somewhere, there’s another hour and forty minutes of screen-searing didactic comic-book set-pieces just like this one, apparently all strung together into the world’s most expensive HR role-play training video.

Stabny makes a legitimate point, though: If the locomotive engineers die in a company-killing train wreck, they won’t have jobs anyway — so what’s the beef? And how can they think of themselves when it’s actually Stabny who’s assuming all the on-paper risks of building her railroad out of an unknown metal she bought from a stranger?

Seriously, that’s the sort of brutal moral clarity that has me rethinking this whole collective-bargaining brouhaha. If you aren’t willing to die for your paycheck, maybe you don’t deserve to eat help make Stabny richer.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 03/31/11 at 11:45 AM

Categories: MoviesMovie NewsPoliticsNuttersTeabaggeryYouTubidity

Sunday, March 27, 2011

“American: The Bill Hicks Story” Coming in April, Kinda

This appears to be a 2009 British production that was never released stateside and is still only available in US-hostile PAL format on import DVDs. Right now, engagements are limited to one-shot screenings in a dozen major US and Canadian markets…but I figured I’d alert our Big-City ‘Roasters, just so they can make plans to see this and Atlas Shrugged on separate nights. 

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 03/27/11 at 06:13 PM

Categories: MoviesMovie News

Saturday, March 26, 2011

In the Future, Everyone Will Be a Mysterious Objectivist Anti-Hero for Three Seconds

Hey, kids! Be the first Galt in YOUR Gulch to win a 3-second cameo on a throwaway “Special Feature” track of the sure-to-be-collectible DVD/Blu-ray release of a Mammoth Movie Milestone that STILL doesn’t have a distributor!

Remember all the fun we had last year with the “I Am the Tea Party Leader” videos? Well, here’s our chance at a second bite from the Forbidden Fruit of Self-Selecting Affinity Groups, courtesy of the producers of Atlas Shrugged: Part 1. Apparently — given the resistance of parasitical, collectivist movie theaters to jump aboard Dagny Taggart’s Super-Train to Selfish-Town — the filmmakers have staked their rational self-interest and survival-seeking, morally-ambivalent egoism on a grassroots marketing campaign that’s not just “viral,” it’s damn-near Treatment-Resistant Face-Eating Bacterial.

The full video gallery is here, and it’s growing—but I’ve selected my Top 3 Randian Supermen from the current crop below the fold.

read the whole post »

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 03/26/11 at 05:55 PM

Categories: MoviesMovie NewsPoliticsNuttersYouTubidity

Monday, February 21, 2011

Forget Everything You Thought You Knew About Eye-Gouging Tedium

If only those walls could talk, this movie might have some dialogue worth sitting through.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 02/21/11 at 05:38 PM

Categories: MoviesMovie NewsYouTubidity

Friday, February 11, 2011

Coming Soon to a Righteously Amoral and Self-Serving Theater Near You

Definitely the feel-smugly-self-satisfied-about-being-a-soulless-shitheel hit of the Summer! (Actually, it comes out on APRIL 15TH. Take THAT, Confiscatory Bureaucrat Overlords!)

Sad casting pick: A middle-aged Danny Noonan.

Happy casting pick: Covetous, Randian ST alien Quark!

Here’s what the Galt-Heads are saying.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 02/11/11 at 06:58 PM

Categories: MoviesMovie NewsYouTubidity

Monday, December 20, 2010

They Call Me MISTER Heimdall!: Black Actor Playing “White God” of Asgard Has Bigots Seeing Red

Da Teutonic Bomb: Idris Elba as the all-seeing badass Heimdall in Thor

The friendly Christian White European anti-miscegenists at the Council of Conservative Citizens are racially royally pissed at Marvel Comics for casting swarthy Briton Idris Elba (The Wire) to portray Heimdall, guardian of the Rainbow Bridge and whitest-of-the-all-white Asgardian deities in the new Thor movie, so they’re folding their sheets and staying home.

Realizing, of course, that Blacks are too busy shooting craps and hanging out at race tracks to conceive this mockery of Nordic Suprematude on their own, the CCC follows the trail of perfidy to its unsurprising source, the Jews:

Marvel has a history of advocating for the left-wing. In early 2010 they even used their Captain America comic to attack the TEA Party movement. Marvel front man Stan “Lee” Lieber personally funds left-wing political candidates. Now Marvel has inserted left-wing social engineering into European mythology, casting a black man to play a Norse deity.

Also, in accordance with CCC’s apparent policy of “no slur left behind,” the boycott page cites a recent Guardian write-up suggesting that—compared to Dolph Lundgren in He-Man—Chris Hemsworth’s Thor is kind of a homo.

Since advance screenings of production footage from Thor have been limited, the CCC is likely unaware of other Liberal Hollywood retrofits to the mythos that fan-boys like me have known about for months. For example:

♦  Thor’s enchanted hammer “Mjolnir” has been renamed “Mayor McFisty.”

♦  Bifrost, the Rainbow Bridge connecting Earth and Asgard, is referred to in the film as the Rainbow Coalition Bridge.

♦  Loki, the God of Evil, plots the destruction of Asgard by canceling public funding for essential urban infrastructure projects and the opening of Valhalla to warriors who haven’t died in battle, but can prove they make less than $600 a month and are actively looking for full-time work. He is defeated when the lesser gods and trolls make peace and vote to unionize.

♦  “Ride of the Valkyries” is performed over the end-credits by Afra and the Incredible Beatbox Band.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 12/20/10 at 11:04 PM

Categories: MoviesMovie NewsPoliticsNutters

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Leslie Nielsen 1926-2010

First the WikiLeaks core dump, now this. The world is getting scads less funny by the minute.

[UPDATE]: Might as well include the “Hospital Scene,” just for the added pleasure of John Houseman…and watching OJ get smacked around in the ICU. It’s below the fold:

read the whole post »

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 11/28/10 at 10:10 PM

Categories: MoviesMovie News

Sunday, August 08, 2010

Patricia Neal Dead at 84

Lovely, gifted, whiskey-voiced, classy, courageous in her personal life. And immortal, to geeks like me, because she said the words.

RIP Ms. Neal. You’re part of the permanent record.

Her IMDB bio is here.

Posted by StrangeAppar8us on 08/08/10 at 11:29 PM

Categories: MoviesMovie News

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