Our Stupid Media

Sunday, October 27, 2013

Let’s all not listen to Dick Cheney, m’kay?

The Prince of Darkness, Dick Cheney, has been throwing shade again, and I was kind of going to go into why what he’s saying doesn’t even make sense or go into how getting bin Laden probably couldn’t even be kept a secret and any intelligence gathered would have an expiration date and he’s just jealous anyway, but look. Let’s just get this out of the way—his relevance is as a historical figure, a member of the administration that blew off the intelligence that bin Laden was poised to strike on American soil and embraced bad intelligence about WMD’s in Iraq. He is respected by connoisseurs of a very particular art in politics because of how good he used to be. But let’s look at how he plies his particular forte these days:

He lies about whether he has fished with Senator Mike Enzi, because his darling little girl and fifth deferment wants the man’s job. Did the senator think they were any kind of friends? Huh. Well. Henry Whittington was a friend of Dick Cheney’s, too.

Now, maybe the former Vice President simply forgot whether he was part of a fly-fishing tournament with Enzi, because it’s not like angling is such a great passion of his (maybe compared to shooting little birds by the barrelful it isn’t), and besides, the man can forget a thing or two, can’t he? Like how often he might have met former Senator John Edwards when he dissembled about that during the 2004 campaign. No, it’s not quite as bad as the way he had repeated lies about, say, Saddam Hussein and yellowcake uranium, or the non-existent Mohammed Atta-Iraq connection. It’s a sign, however, of how petty he’s willing to be.

To the extent he acts trifling—he is trifling.  He has managed to, in his retiring years, become the EF Hutton of bullshit, and I can’t imagine why anyone listens anymore.

(X-posted at Strangely Blogged.)

Posted by Vixen Strangely on 10/27/13 at 01:45 PM
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Tuesday, October 08, 2013

Today in Obama Betrayals . . .

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Wait, what?  He did?  Yes, he did!  Obama nominated Janet Yellen to chair the U.S. Federal Reserve.  Going to be a tough job going forward but she is seemingly a tough lady. 

And speaking of tough - the Prez trash talked the Rethugs for an hour today in his presser.  I’m liking second term Obama more and more.

Posted by marindenver on 10/08/13 at 08:37 PM
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Friday, September 13, 2013

Yes, Virginia.  There Really Is American Exceptionalism

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Well, boys and girls, it’s that time again.  Treasury tells us we’re about to reach our debt limit in the Halloweenish time frame, so the House Sons of Anarchy Caucus is gearing up to prove just how masterful they are at political mind games even if they can’t get out of their own way on matters legislative.

Many of us mere mortals of the “represented” class have it on good authority that this is a dangerous game that can result in credit downgrades, Wall Street volatility and all sorts of other, more localized economic mayhem.  That is why the Congressional Record reflects a long and relatively serene history of periodic debt limit rises, as the need arose.

But that was then, and . . . well, you know the rest.  Things are a lot different today, now that a subset of Exceptional Americans have decided that, if government involves community organizer black people in the White House, fewer guns, more abortions and allowing every Tom, Dick and Harriet to vote, then they just don’t want none of that “gummint” stuff anymore.  So they’re fixing to blow it up and the debt limit is the perfect IED.

And the cherry on top? A brand new, ultra-timely NBC/Wall Street Journal Poll telling us what to think:

By a 44-22 percent margin, Americans oppose raising the debt ceiling . . .

A poll like this is analagous to asking your mailman, pastor and the cafeteria lady whether you should go for chemo and/or radiation for your brain tumor.  The answers that those folks give you may make you feel less alone but they won’t even come close to solving the problem.

And, BTW, what’s up with the math thing, NBC/WSJ guys?  What about the missing 33%?  Are they the ones who laughed in your faces, the ones who gave a NSFW response to such an idiotic question.  You do realize that your results indicate nothing useful to the real people wrestling with this “problem”  that should be a no-brainer? 

These numbers are significant only in that they demonstrate everyday Americans’ woeful ignorance of how their a) government b) global economy and c) national budget process work.  But ooh Baby! do they love giving their opinions anyway.  The thing that’s most exceptional about Americans, IMO, is that they are literally fearless about appearing stupid.  If they don’t understand something, they’ll never admit it—they’ll pretend they have advanced degrees in whatever it is and demonstrate their ignorance in a thoroughly American, thoroughly dramatic way.

Oh and one more thing it demonstrates . . . it shows how people like some of the ignorant miscreants currently gumming things up in the US Congress get elected.

Posted by Bette Noir on 09/13/13 at 09:54 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersBqhatevwrOur Stupid Media

Saturday, September 07, 2013

The Gospel According to ‘Love It or Leave It’ Perino

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Dana Perino is tired of pushy atheists and thinks they should leave the country if they don’t like having their lives saturated with Christianism.  Because that’s what America’s all about, right?  Love it or leave it, majority rules, etc, etc.

The reason Ms. Perino is troubling herself with this?  a current case before the Massachusetts Supreme Court, in which atheist lawyer David Niose argued that the words “under God” in the Pledge of Allegiance violate the Equal Rights Amendment of the state’s constitution.

Perino’s take?

I’m tired of them.  I remember working at the Justice Department years ago when I first started right after 9/11 and a lawsuit like this came through, and before the day had finished, the United States Senate and the House of Representatives had both passed resolutions saying that they were for keeping ‘under God’ in the pledge.

If these people really don’t like it, they don’t have to live here.

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Posted by Bette Noir on 09/07/13 at 10:41 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersBqhatevwrOur Stupid Media

Monday, August 26, 2013

You Keep Using That Word…

Former Breitbart rent-boy James O’Keefe must think the word “veritas” means “punch myself in the face:”

I’m no expert at “gotcha” video production and editing, but it seems like a bad idea to lead with three-plus minutes of the target establishing utter and complete pwnage. What’s he going to do for an encore, pour kerosene on his crotch and light a match?

[H/T: TPM. X-posted at Balloon Juice]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 08/26/13 at 03:57 PM
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Categories: PoliticsNuttersOur Stupid MediaYouTubidity

Saturday, August 24, 2013

Trump U Does Have a Certain Ring, No?

It looks like The Donald is being The Sued over a kind of “get-rich eventually” program that he was kindly enough calling a school.  Trump is of the opinion that this suit against him is politically motivated, because…hm.  He could be a somebody. He could be a contender. Instead of a bum, which is what everyone who notices that he is a bum makes of him on teh internets. But let’s hear what he has to say:

“....”

Oh. Wait. What does his spokesperson have to say?

“The attorney general has been angry because he felt that Mr. Trump and his various companies should have done much more for him in terms of fundraising,” Cohen said. “This entire investigation is politically motivated and it is a tremendous waste of taxpayers’ money.”

State Board of Elections records show Trump has spent more than $136,000 on New York campaigns since 2010. He contributed $12,500 to Schneiderman in October 2010, when Schneiderman was running for attorney general, records show. An outspoken conservative, Trump himself flirted with a presidential run last year.

“Donald Trump will not sit back and be extorted by anyone, including the attorney general,” Cohen said.

I am astonished that wealthy people in America donate to campaigns ever, or are concerned that their money bought them influence. Why do they even bother? It’s nonsense, is what it is. Clearly, extortion is that thing of when, you thought you bought protection, but oh no, You “bought” people who bring legal cases against things you might have done that were illegal like it was their job.  Huh. Maybe attorney generals are not good investments if you are running a “get rich eventually” scheme.” Also not a good investment? The word “University”.  Don’t bother copyrighting that one, you shan’t use it legally.

What I’m saying is, once (as in not) and future (as in not) Presidential Candidate Donald Trump is kind of a grifter. As in duh. But I bet he is still popular with the sort who likes his kind of…

Oh what the fuck—remember Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous?  (It was MTV Cribs for ‘80’s celebrities.) That’s all of his appeal. Otherwise seriously. Ask him about anything. Besides whether any politician is a legit citizen. And let the derp ensue. (Not that I think he won’t be faux elevated in the press again, because I do—which is why I point out his “duh”.)

Posted by Vixen Strangely on 08/24/13 at 09:57 PM
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Monday, August 19, 2013

The GOP’s Politics of Moderation

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One of last week’s lighter political moments was the RNC tantrum over the runaway liberal bias of the lamestream media’s plan to immortalize Hillary Clinton [as only a TV bio-pic can] who might, or might not run for president someday.

Now, this is pretty funny stuff on a number of levels.  For example, it is my contention that IF Hill decides to run, Republicans have a whale of a lot more to worry about than a three-year-old cable film tipping the scales.

And, despite the fact that FOX was in the running for production, excitable Republicans were just sure that the film would be a love-letter to Hillary.  But, as those of us who remember the real-time rise of the Clintons know, there’s a lot more dirt in their past, than fluffy white clouds, for a dramatist to work with.  Just ask Kenneth Starr, Monica Lewinski, Newt Gingrich . . .

And, while you’re at it, ask Newt how well that impeachment thingy went for the GOP.  Remember? Newt expected the Republicans’ “divine intervention” in the Clinton presidency to guarantee a pick up of at least 30 seats, in the House, during the 1998 mid-term elections.  In actual fact, a fairly disgusted America rewarded Republicans with a net loss of 5 seats instead.

And, then, of course there is the modern Republican candidates’ propensity for on-air political hara kiri, in which the clean-cut, All-American posed in front of an American flag opens his/her mouth and magically transforms into a far-right wacko-bird . . . to use a Republican-coined term.

So.  It is what it is and we’re all pretty used to it by now BUT—a new idea was born in the minds of wily Republican strategists for a new way to self-immolate: the Limbaugh-moderated primary debate.  Delighting conservatives and Democrats in a rare bipartisan moment.

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Posted by Bette Noir on 08/19/13 at 12:07 PM
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Categories: PoliticsElection '16NuttersOur Stupid Media

Friday, August 16, 2013

RNC Votes Unanimously To Cut Off Nose; Spite Face

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(illustration h/t the very talented Mario Piperni)

Well, it’s official, the Republican National committee is carrying out its threatened punishment of CNN and NBC over the networks’ plans to air a movie on imaginary 2016 Democratic presidential candidate, Hillary Clinton.  After getting wind of the film project, the RNC’s Prince Rebus sent protest letters to the heads of both networks, followed up by a protracted media-blitz pout.

Here’s a taste of the letters:

[A]s American citizens, certainly you recognize why many are astounded at your actions, which appear to be a major network’s thinly-veiled attempt at putting a thumb on the scales of the 2016 presidential election.

And the “unkindest cut of all”:

If you have not agreed to pull this programming prior to the start of the RNC’s Summer Meeting on August 14[, 2013], I will seek a binding vote of the RNC stating that the committee will neither partner with you in 2016 primary debates nor sanction primary debates which you sponsor.

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Posted by Bette Noir on 08/16/13 at 11:39 AM
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Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Throwing-Stone Concessions Rebound on Publication of Sally Quinn Column

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

WASHINGTON DC—July 30, 2013— With millions of consumers making the move to glass houses, stone concessions—kiosks that dispense hefty rocks suitable for hurling through plate glass—were thought to be part of a dying industry, a relic like typewriter ribbon production plants and “Wite-Out” factories. But a new piece by WashingtonPost.com “On Faith” columnist Sally Quinn has unexpectedly breathed life into a waning economic sector.

In a column entitled “Blaming Huma Abedin,” Quinn outlines her objections to Anthony Wiener’s wife’s decision to stand by the pixyish peen-pix purveyor rather than doing something more dignified, such as finding a rich, married managing editor to hump and then parlaying that opportunity into a lofty nepotism perch from which to lord it over the Beltway social scene for the next 50 years.

“I’m telling you, this industry was on its last legs, what with the loss of privacy thanks to the Internet and people’s growing sense that they could attract an incoming barrage if they let stones fly at a neighbor’s glass house in a particularly hypocritical manner,” said Bash Brickbat, proprietor of Ye Olde Stone Shoppe, a colorfully painted pushcart on K Street.

“I mean, everyone is a little hypocritical, but come on. Sally’s column landed like a meteor in the side of the Hoover Dam, just sending hypocrisy gushing through the wall and flooding the valley,” Brickbat continued. “This is emboldening a whole new bunch of eye-mote removers with beams of their own. It’s like that time Bill Kristol accused someone of being wrong about Iraq.”

When read the following excerpt from Quinn’s column, several throwing-stone industry analysts responded with incredulity and terminated a reporter’s call, concluding that they were victims of a prank:

I have nothing against Abedin. I like her: She is a lovely, gracious, intelligent woman. I ache for her need to come to the rescue of this man who has betrayed her so often and will likely do it again. I ache for all women who find themselves in this position. And yet, there she stood in front of the cameras, this modern American career woman, by her man, saying she had forgiven him, loved him and believed in him. Just what exactly does she believe in? The only thing she can believe in for sure is that he will continue his infidelity.

Though her friends say she is strong and resolute and defiant, sadly she makes all women look like weak and helpless victims. She was not standing there in a position of strength. It was such a setback for women everywhere.

Other analysts urged caution at the prospect of a tossing-stone industry resurgence sparked by Quinn’s column:

“Look, the Washington Post shunted Quinn off to their online edition years ago because she’s such an embarrassment,” said one analyst, under the condition of anonymity. “You can think Wiener’s an eFlasher who would make a terrible mayor, and you can believe Abedin’s an idiot for putting up with his bullshit.

You can even imagine that Abedin’s choice somehow reflects badly on every other woman on the planet, though to make that leap, it helps if you’re psychotic. But you don’t publicly tut-tut ‘infidelity,’ not if you’re Sally Fucking Quinn.”

Posted by Betty Cracker on 07/30/13 at 02:42 PM
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Friday, July 19, 2013

Rubin Endorsement Dooms Cheney Senate Bid

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It took a little over 24 hours for Jennifer Rubin to catch her breath, after the conservo-gastic news broke that the Cheney Dynasty lives and plans to run for public office.  It was then, that a reborn Rubin tapped out her homage: Liz Cheney How Do I Love Thee, Let Me Count the Ways to grace the pages of The Washington Post.

And what a load of fluffy crap it is.  Rubin settled on the lazy journalist’s friend, the listicle-format, to sketch in her Top Ten Reasons that Liz Cheney is a great Senate candidate—and it’s pretty obvious that she ran out of steam (and nice things to say about Cheney) somewhere around Item #4.  If these are her top ten, we really don’t want to see the rest of the list.

Also, I should note that Rubin knows she’s somewhat out on a limb with this particular viewpoint, here’s how she opens her article list:

The clubby Senate and many in the press already are snickering at Liz Cheney’s run for the Senate.

But, of course, Rubin sometimes likes to be all maverick-y, despite her past slavish devotion to Willard Romney, the Wonder Bread of the GOP.

read the whole post »

Posted by Bette Noir on 07/19/13 at 09:46 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBqhatevwrBushCoElection '14Our Stupid MediaSkull Hampers

Monday, July 15, 2013

They’ll Say My Foot Was in the Right Place, I Hope

This is a clip from an interview with Juror B37 from the Zimmerman trial who was given a pretty soft interview by Anderson Cooper. She has a book deal lined up to discuss a variety of things, like, I guess, how she made up her mind before the trial, and how she thinks that peaceful demonstrations that actually got a trial to come about were “riots”, how this trial was certainly not about race (Heavens!)and a whole lot of other odd foolishness compelling details.

In America, one can sometimes be assured of getting a jury of one’s peers.

I think it’s interesting that she referred to the defendant in the trial as “George” throughout the interview and that she wholly believed the testimony of a man who did not testify. I will look forward to seeing her story on the remainders table at the 99Cent Store.

(X-Posted at Strangely Blogged)

Posted by Vixen Strangely on 07/15/13 at 10:52 PM
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Electric Ooga-Boogaloo

Can a too-tight hatband cut off circulation to the brain, causing the wearer to babble stupid things uncontrollably? Two influential wingnut race-baiters may need to adjust the fit of their trademark fedoras. Here’s a screen shot of the current front page of The Drudge Report:

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These assholes have such a boner for racially tinged violence that they’ll just flat make shit up if protests are mostly peaceful, and from what I gather on legitimate news sites, they were, aside from a handful of arrests here and there. It’s hardly “America in Flames!”—to the palpable disappointment of many.

Here is Roger L. Simon, another fedora-sporting douche-barge:

By injecting himself in a minor Florida criminal case by implying Martin could be his son, the president of the United States — a onetime law lecturer, of all things — disgraced himself and his office, made a mockery of our legal system and exacerbated racial tensions in our country, making them worse than they have been in years. This is the work of a reactionary, someone who consciously/unconsciously wants to push our nation back to the 1950s.

Yeah, I’m sure Barack Obama wants to go back to the 1950s so his parents can get arrested for miscegenation, he can use the separate bathroom facilities and not eat at the Woolworth’s lunch counter. Simon probably tries to fit the fedora on his ass and elbows every morning before remembering that it goes on his empty head.

[X-posted at Balloon Juice]

 

Posted by Betty Cracker on 07/15/13 at 11:51 AM
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Categories: NewsPoliticsNuttersOur Stupid Media

Saturday, July 13, 2013

Farewell, Big Sis, Plus Open Thread

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Wingnuts will soon have to find another target for their misogyny, paranoia and homophobia:

Janet Napolitano, the secretary of homeland security, announced Friday that she was stepping down, setting off a search to fill one of the most challenging positions in government at a time when the Obama administration is struggling to get a team in place for the president’s second term.

The vacancy sets the stage for another confirmation fight as Republicans continue their efforts to nullify the last two presidential elections. There’s no word yet on whom the president will nominate, but WaPo put together a speculative list, including:

[Joe] Lieberman makes sense as DHS secretary for one pretty obvious reason: He created the department. Lieberman, as chair of the committee that is now referred to as the Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee, drafted the bill that created DHS shortly after Sept. 11, 2001. He also recently retired from the Senate, meaning he’s a free agent. But his tendency to give his Democratic colleagues heartburn be a spiteful, war-mongering Republican dick may not make him an ideal fit. [Edited for accuracy]

No, no, a thousand, million, kajillion, ding-dong-dillion times, no. Jenny Durkan (profiled in that same WaPo article) sounds qualified, and since she’s an out lesbian, her candidacy would have the added benefit of triggering even more Lesbocalypse fears among the right-wing assholes who have spent the last five years absurdly imagining that the innocuous Ms. Napolitano was rifling through their underwear drawer and monitoring activities at the Moose lodge.

But perhaps the best outcome—and most fitting monument to Lieberman’s work in the Senate—would be to abolish the Department of Homeland Security altogether, break it up into its component parts. Like so much that is wrong with this country, it’s a remnant of post-9/11 hysteria.

Or we could at least change the name, which, as Peggy Noonan pointed out in a rare moment of clarity, is “vaguely Teutonic.” What shall we call it? Please feel free to discuss other topics too—open threadage.

[X-posted at Balloon Juice]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 07/13/13 at 08:50 AM
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Categories: PoliticsBarack ObamaOur Stupid MediaWar On Women

Monday, July 01, 2013

Rachel Maddow’s T-dance with the Devil

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If you’re gay, like me, or are related to/work with/care about or know someone who is gay, like most of us, this has been a particularly wonderful week.  And it was just lagniappe, as they say in The Big Easy, to sip a Sunday morning cup of joe while watching Kindly Doc Maddow shoot conservative fish in a barrel.

David Gregory hosted Maddow, along with Jim DeMint and Ralph Reed on Meet the Press to discuss fine points of conservative social policy in the wake of SCOTUS’ “extremist” decisions on marriage equality as well as the abortion bill train wreck in the Texas Senate, last week.

Conservatives showed up lumbered with their grab-bag of outdated, debunked polls and “scientific studies” designed to prove that their zombie social policies still walk among us and have some sort of relevance to some sort of American people.

The fellows in the suits settled in for an hour of pedantic bloviation about the impending Fall of Western Civilization should teh gayz be permitted to destroy traditional marriage and the lives of their children.  And to trot out their new abortion meme about how closing abortion clinics and mandating pre-abortion trans-vaginal ultrasounds for all are just their way of saying “we care about the safety of women and babies.”

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Posted by Bette Noir on 07/01/13 at 08:15 AM
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Categories: Geek SpeakLGBTPoliticsElection '14Our Stupid Media

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

When Is a Senator Not a Senator?

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Sen. Mike Lee, like many of his Senate colleagues, has a law degree.  His is from Brigham Young and, apparently, Lee fancies himself to be something of a constitutional scholar.  I say that because Mike Lee likes to pronounce things unconstitutional.  Especially things like Obamacare.

Lee also appears to be quite the over-achiever.  For example, whilst serving as the brand new senator from Utah, Lee has somehow managed to find the time to write two books (not one—count ‘em, two books) while also trying to learn the ropes of senator-ing. 

If John McCain is any judge of the latter, Lee probably ought to stick to book-writing:

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Posted by Bette Noir on 06/19/13 at 04:25 PM
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Categories: PoliticsBedwettersNuttersTeabaggeryOur Stupid Media

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