Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Things look pretty solid for Rumproast in the Weblog Awards.  We’ve already provided the meat, now everyone do the vega-boogie! [via]

SOMEWHAT RELATED: We write “letters.”

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/13/09 at 12:57 AM
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Monday, January 12, 2009

A vote for Rumproast in the Weblog Awards is a sharp poke in the eye to the one of the blogosphere’s most universally loathed bus station pests, The Confluence’s myiq2xu, who came up with the sure-to-fail plan of keeping us from winning by endorsing a homophobic, Hillary-hating wingnut blogger in our category, and it’s also a vote against insanely delusional and racist PUMA rants like this:

mountainsong 01.12.09 at 12:02 am

  Ths weekend, I heard some disturbing talk. I hope that’s all it was, but I don’t thinks so.
  Some people were saying that blacks have declared an ‘unspoken Declaration of War’ against the United States. Not all blacks, but certainly those who affiliate with thir generalisimo, BO
  They said we couldn’t stop him from being elected. And we wont stop him in the next 4 years. But they are 100% serious about a ‘do or die” idea about changing this country.
  I think it’s sad we can’t all see ourselves as brothers and sisters. Even sadder that I may have to assume wearing the mantle of “racist.” Well, if they want to take the guns and ammunition, ‘they’ are going to have to find them, first.
  These people said that for many years the whites treated the blacks as disposables, dispensable. And that what goes around, comes around. That during the entire campaign they used the white youth and high society and will now dump them since they’ve served their purpose.
  I asked if they were from ACORN, by any chance, and they all acted like they didn’t know what I was talking about.
  So, I said something like, “You don’t really believe all this shit do you?” They said, “You’ll see.” And I said “F*k you!” and left.

Now go vote for us and for all of these fine folks below.  Some of them really need your vote, so please do your part. Roar.

• Best Very Large Blog: Jesus’ General (vote here)
  
• Best Hidden Gem: The Pajama Pundit (vote here)
  
• Best Liberal Blog: THE BIGGEST CHEATER IN THE WORLD  (vote here) Ha ha!  Haxxor perl script promisez, failure #1 and failure #2. Where iz? Obama kill haxxor? *fart*
  
• Best Humor Blog: Jon Swift (vote here)
  
• Best Large Blog: skippy the bush kangaroo (vote here)
  
• Best Military Blog: Army of Dude (vote here)
  
• Best New Blog: ~ synthesis ~ (vote here)
  
• Best Up and Coming Blog: Connecting.the.Dots (vote here)
  
• Best Individual Blogger: Driftglass (vote here)
  
• Best Political Coverage: Nobody’s going to beat FiveThirtyEight (with good reason), so vote for Daily Kos just because it’ll make Flowbee’s fucking head explode losing to Markos, who doesn’t seem to give a shit about these awards.
  
• Best LGBT Blog: Pam’s House Blend (vote here)
  
• Best Science Blog: Pharyngula (vote here)
  
• Best Major Blog: Balloon Juice ... oops ... nope ... TBogg (vote here)
  
• Best Comic Strip: xkcd (vote here)
  
• Best UK Blog: Created In Birmingham (vote here)
  

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/12/09 at 01:23 PM
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The Beast strikes gold again with their yearly list of the 50 most loathsome people in America.  Since our PUMA moratorium is kicking in as soon as the Weblog Awards are over (vote! vote!), we’ve just gotta highlight this one while we can:

22. PUMAs

Charges: Redefining feminism as “supporting Hillary Clinton, whether she wants you to or not,” and “defending” that feminism by embodying negative stereotypes of women as irrational and scornful, there was no demographic more painfully dumb than aggrieved Hillary backers plotting to defeat Obama. Drunk on a dream of vengeance for their queen, this strange minority picked up every despicable, paranoid, racist talking point they could from the worst of the right wing, even complimenting Sean Hannity on his “fair and balanced” coverage of Obama. Desperately twisting words in a sad attempt to tar Obama as a sexist and willing to subject themselves and their country to a probable assault on reproductive rights in the name of spite, the PUMAs comported themselves with all the dignity and sense of a false rape accusation.

Exhibit A: It’s hard to choose, but nothing was more ridiculous this year than hearing an obscenely rich Hillary fundraiser named “Lady de Rothschild” describe Obama as “an elitist.”

Sentence: President Palin appoints Mullah Omar to Supreme Court.

And without peeking, guess who is #1? Hint: it’ll make #22 really angry. Nope, not her. Yep, her.

Read it all.

[hat tip Wendy via email]

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/12/09 at 01:08 AM
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Saturday, January 10, 2009

From CQ Politics:

The Federal Election Commission recently sought advice from outsiders about how the agency could better enforce campaign finance laws. But what it got was completely unexpected — some 200 letters questioning President-elect Obama’s citizenship and demanding an immediate audit of his campaign finances.

You know what’s coming next…

Some comments were tinged with racism. “What the heck is going on here?” wrote one woman from Obama’s home state of Illinois. She accused the president-elect of not disclosing enough information about his family, employment, health and education backgrounds.

You know what’s coming next…

Many of the letters came from members of the People United Means Action political action committee. The PUMA PAC, as it’s known, recently published an article raising questions about Obama’s donors, which included a form letter calling for an audit that people were encouraged to forward to the FEC.

That concludes the post called “You Know What’s Coming Next.”

[hat tip Pumalicious!]

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/10/09 at 12:18 PM
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Thursday, January 08, 2009

...comparing PUMAs to persecuted Jews or getting Debbie Schlussel to write for Big Hollywood.

Halp?

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/08/09 at 05:01 PM
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First of all, vote for us for Best Small Blog.  Just so you know, in the weird world of ROARtardism, that counts as “cheating.”  Asking people to vote for your blog. Cheating. Here’s another example of “cheating” ... they’re normally called “endorsements,” but when you’re recommending a non-PUMA blog (or one not written by the PUMA’s freshly-minted, women’s-rights-hatin’ wingnut pal Debster) it’s ... that’s right ... “cheating.” (Eschaton, a PROWL awaits!) So when you vote for these blogs, remember that you’re “cheating.” JUST LIKE IN THE CAUCUSES!!! MICHELLE OBAMA IS A SCOOP MOUTH!!! DONNA BRAZILE IS SATAN!!! BLORT!!!!!!!!

• Best Small Blog: RumpCheaterMcCheater (vote here)
  
• Best New Blog: ~ synthesis ~ (vote here) [see update below]
  
• Best Individual Blogger: Driftglass (vote here)
  
• Best Humor Blog: Jon Swift (vote here)
  
• Best Liberal Blog: Whatever THE BIGGEST CHEATER IN THE WORLD says. Ha ha!  *fart*
  
• Best Political Coverage: Nobody’s going to beat FiveThirtyEight (with good reason), so vote for Daily Kos just because it’ll make Flowbee’s fucking head explode losing to Markos, who doesn’t seem to give a shit about these awards.
  
• Best Military Blog: Army of Dude (vote here)
  
• Best LGBT Blog: Pam’s House Blend (vote here)
  
• Best Science Blog: Pharyngula (vote here)
  
• Best Major Blog: Balloon Juice ... oops ... nope ... TBogg (vote here)
  
• Best Very Large Blog: Jesus’ General (vote here)
  
• Best Large Blog: skippy the bush kangaroo (vote here)
  
• Best Up and Coming Blog: Connecting.the.Dots (vote here)
  
• Best Hidden Gem: The Pajama Pundit (vote here)
  
• Best Comic Strip: xkcd (vote here)
  
• Best UK Blog: Created In Birmingham (vote here)
  

Previous Weblog Awards post here.

read the whole post »

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/08/09 at 10:49 AM
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Wednesday, January 07, 2009

One of Rumproast’s “little female house slaves” Mrs. Polly has written a flat out magnum opus about those petulant PUMAs that’s a must read.  Here’s a taste:

But PUMA blithely exchanged Hillary’s feminist values for those of John McCain, who opposed equal pay for equal work, voted to impeach Hillary’s husband, happily told rape jokes, verbally abused his wife (“at least I don’t slather on the makeup like a trollop, you c**t”) and disparaged young Chelsea’s looks. They went as well for anti-intellectual mannequin and Republican frozen cheesecake Sarah Palin as if the indifferent scholar and neo-con pinup were a reasonable substitute for detail-oriented Ivy-League magna-cum-laude policy wonk Hillary, thereby endorsing the idea that genitalia trumps everything, from ideology to policy.

Go to her fine blog snarkopolitan and read it now.

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/07/09 at 11:43 AM
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Deregulation? Credit default swaps? Erosion of the manufacturing base? Trade deficits? Spiraling health care costs? An overvalued housing market? Wall Street greed? A perfect storm of all these elements combined? No, silly! According to Riverchucky, it was sexism, and she plucks a poignant allegory from her own life to demonstrate its deleterious effects:

Imagine what it is like to go to a meeting where you are one of less than a handful of females in a roomful of men. You have a presentation but as you begin to make it, several of the guys interrupt you. They smirk at some of your statements.

Riverchucky doesn’t have to imagine what this is like, bitchez, because she lived it. And no, the immature penis-owners in the room weren’t merely smirking at her uncanny resemblance to the horror movie Chucky or at the memory of her embarrassing LiveJournal entries—they were dismissing her ideas because of her lady parts. Motivated purely by malice and misogyny, they accused her of having a “difficult personality” and failed to heed the prescient warnings she was attempting to convey. And so the company suffered.

read the whole post »

Posted by Betty Cracker on 01/07/09 at 11:42 AM
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THIS POST IS CLOSED—MORE CHEATER-ENDORSED BLOGS HERE!

This is so fucking on! Don’t let the PUMAs win this thing.  They must not win anything. Ever. It is their destiny. Vote for Rumproast in the Weblog Awards for Best Small Blog. You can vote once every 24-hour period per computer. If any of our blog buddies could help us out with promoting this, we’d appreciate it. As an added bonus, every time you vote for Rumproast, a PUMA loses its roar.

You can read the previous action-packed thread here, but not until you vote.

MORE: Please also consider voting for friends of Rumproast Wonkette (vote here), Balloon Juice (vote here), Jon Swift (vote here), and Jesus’ General (vote here).

read the whole post »

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/07/09 at 10:36 AM
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Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Because:

All of our writers are committed to writing fact-based, verified commentary on the most critical subjects of our time…

One word: “Whitey Tape.”

That’s right. “Whitey Tape” is in fact one word.

I had that “verified.”

It’s most certainly “fact-based.”

And I am 100% “committed,” or, like No Quarter’s nuttiest writers, maybe I should be committed.

Posted by Noah on 01/06/09 at 09:14 PM
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Monday, January 05, 2009

Huzzah?!?:

Interview With Senate Hopeful Harriet Christian
Wednesday, December 31, 2008 – 3:00 pm (Transcribed from recording)

MB: What made you decide to vie for Senator Clinton’s seat? Was it 9/11?

*thud*

RELATED: Here.

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/05/09 at 09:38 AM
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WaPo‘s article about the Obama family’s two-week stay at the Hay-Adams hotel in D.C. is sure to provoke much heartburn today:

Just off the lobby, where a lavish $65-a-plate Sunday brunch was underway, almost none of the well-dressed diners mentioned Obama or his family already ensconced in a suite upstairs.

Don’t let the cool demeanors fool you, though, said one diner. “That’s what everyone’s thinking about even if they don’t say it,” Terrance Mason said later, a safe distance from the elegant dining room. “Just to be in the same building, to be breathing the same air. It’s amazing.”

Ha ha.  “It’s amazing.”  Too funny. Bonus points in comments to the first person who finds a blog post or comment where this quote is driving someone insane. I love this game!

EXTRA CREDIT: The presidential seal! The arrogance, it mocks me!

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/05/09 at 09:12 AM
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Saturday, January 03, 2009

Diogenes with His Lantern

BJinChicago concluded his recent post at Partizane with the following:

Jerome R. Corsi at World Net Daily has also been exploring the Rezko/ Obama real estate story (http://www.wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=84101) and shares what he has found out about the Obama house and Miceli at the Cook County’s Assessor’s Office. Corsi brings up the name of Kenneth Conner. Conner is suing the Bank of Harvey over his dismissal, which occurred after Conner questioned the Obama/ Rezko adjacent lot appraisal submitted by Rezko, which Conner deemed to be fraudulently high.

So what’s up with Patrick Fitzgerald? Chicagoans are beginning to whisper that he too has played B-Ball with Obama at a Chicago gym. Like Diogenes with his lantern, I seek an honest man….

Anyone who cites the lying wingnut scumbag Jerome Corsi as a reputable source isn’t going to need a lantern to find “an honest man,” they’re going to need a full frontal lobotomy.

Posted by Kevin K. on 01/03/09 at 01:37 PM
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Tuesday, December 30, 2008

A piece of advice for obnoxious, pig-ignorant blowhards who glean their international affairs talking points from Rush Limbaugh and Little Green Turdballs: Don’t fuck with Zbigniew Brzezinski. Check out Dr. B poleaxing the insufferable Joe Scarborough:

“You have such a stunningly superficial knowledge of what went on it’s almost embarrassing to listen to you.”

As he lamely protests that he reads The New York Times, Washington Post and Foreign Affairs (hey, we know he does because he holds them up for the camera every day!), you can see Scarborough’s porcine little eyes frantically darting around in search of his balls. Suh-WEET!

[H/T: Allan in comments here]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 12/30/08 at 03:08 PM
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I know there are two days of potential failure to go, so perhaps this is premature. But here is my list of top 10 epic political fails of 2008. Discuss!

#10—PUMA Movement: A “movement” in the same sense and level of importance of “bowel movement,” PUMA might be rated #1 if entertainment value and copious evidence of failure were the chief criteria. However, in my poll, consequence counts too, so PUMA struggles into the top 10 at the bottom slot. And only because I personally found them amusing. By rights, the “Bratz” vs “Barbie” kerfluffle should edge them out.

#9—Joe the Plumber: Like a cockroach scrambling for purchase in a swirling toilet, John McCain latched onto the sturdiest-looking turd in the bowl as his campaign foundered. He chose poorly. Not only did bullet-headed lunk (not) Joe the (not) Plumber say wingnutty shit that alienated the McCain supporters with triple-digit IQs (both of them!) and leave McCain in the lurch at rallies, he subsequently disavowed his erstwhile patron and made the world’s worst amateur porn flick.

#8—Fred Thompson’s GOP Presidential Candidacy: Gravitas bestowed by a rumbling baritone voice and numerous flinty-eyed performances on film and TV? Check. Confirmation of virility ostentatiously conveyed by decades-younger wife? Check. Actual vigor and energy? Not so much. The Great GOP Hope clearly preferred a scotch and a nap to campaigning. Oh well.

#7—Mitt Romney’s $35M Investment: Romney’s chief credential is his financial acumen, but what does it say about his investment prowess that he blew $35M clams on his own crappy campaign and failed to convince anyone but Hugh Hewitt of his inevitability? His campaign stunk like a stream of runny dog shit flowing from atop a Country Estate Wagon. But lefty bloggers had the Five Brothers Blog to ridicule for a few precious months.

#6—Paultards: At least their heroine Ayn Rand managed to write some crappy books that inspired a future Fed chairman to enact economy-wrecking policies. Ron Paul supporters’ only accomplishments of note were to fund a stupid blimp and organize flying monkey swarms to derail GOP internet discussions. However, their rEVOLution blimp alone entitles them to primacy over the PUMAs, who couldn’t even gas up the Mini-Winnie RV of Haka Doom.

#5—Giuliani’s Electoral Strategy: What the fuck was that all about? After focusing solely on states that start with an “F” and end with a “Lorida,” Giuliana got his ass handed to him in the state by both McCain and Romney, who each received twice as many votes as Giuliani did. A noun, a verb and 9/11 only go so far.

#4—L’affair Edwards: I long suspected Edwards of being a self-aggrandizing phony. But his focus on poverty during the primary season struck me as at least partially authentic and admirable—and remember, this was before Great Depression Part Deux struck and made it more likely that many of us will join Edwards’ displaced mill workers in the breadline. But then he had to go put a camera-toting chippie on the payroll and get ambushed in the toilet of a fancy hotel while visiting his love child. Idiot. 

#3—George W. Bush: The opposite of King Midas (Gnik Sadim?), everything he touches turns to shit. He’s topped my political fail list for the better part of a decade now, and his attempts to salvage a legacy at this late hour are as contemptible as they are pathetic. Digby said it best:  “They need accept that the best they can hope for is to end up among history’s inept clowns instead of history’s villains. It’s not much, but it’s all they’ve got.”

#2—Sarah Palin: Oh, I’ll admit, she had me worried at first. On paper, she looked good. But then she opened her piehole, launching 987,693 punch lines and finally dooming the McCain campaign. The only question now is whether the sticky little starbursts she coaxed from the (ahem) hard right will congeal into a resolve to repeat the epic fail in 2012. Let’s hope so.

#1—John McCain: To be fair, McCain had Bush around his neck like a millstone, but whose fault is that? If McCain truly possessed the principles and honor on which he bases his personal mythology, he could have set himself up as a credible opponent to Bush ages ago and had a real shot at winning this year.  But he defended the indefensible. He said dumb things and stuck to them. He needlessly alienated a sycophantic press corp. He squandered the unearned good will he’d spent decades deceitfully amassing. So he’s the top loo-hoo-hoo-ZER of 2008 in my book.

So what did I miss?

[Cross-posted at Betty Cracker]

Posted by Betty Cracker on 12/30/08 at 11:11 AM
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